It's 10:00pm and I get some text messages from my boss. It went like this ( Read more... )

There is never a day without drama in my office. Today went something like this ( Read more... )

This afternoon at work, we learned that the entire water supply on Mercer Island has been contaminated with E. coli ( Read more... )

I think that my biggest, most pressing goal right now is to find a way to not work.

I really hate working. Not just my job in particular...just overall, I just...don't want to work.

Yes, I am really, really lazy. I just want to stay at home and do nothing. So far, I've only come up with two solutions ( Read more... )

I was at the park yesterday, sitting on the bench at lunch, watching the waves crash against the lake. A dirty old woman comes and sits next to me on the bench. She takes a jar of peanut butter and a knife from inside her coat. She proceeds to eat scoop after scoop of peanut butter straight from the jar, using the knife as a spoon ( Read more... )

You guys, I'm totally not making this up, sometimes I really think that my office is Haunted ( Read more... )

I was looking at my user profile, and noticed that I started Livejournal on May 10, 2002. That's almost TWELVE YEARS AGO.

TWELVE YEARS.My world has completely changed in ways that I couldn't even begin to explain to you. I don't  even remotely resemble the person I was twelve years ago ( Read more... )

Do you ever get the horrible feeling that you're wasting your life away? I'm being serious here ( Read more... )

You guys, I have a confession to make. I have cooked about FOUR TIMES since 2003. I swear to GOD, this is the honest truth.

And I remember the four times that I have cooked in the past ELEVEN YEARS very vividly. They were ( Read more... )

I'm back, people! Sorry I've been away so long, things just got really, really crazy. My new years resolution is to keep updating this journal on a regular basis and keep it alive!

How is everyone? Did I miss anything crazy?