I met this girl I swore was close to perfect ( Read more... )

Slept in my makeup ( Read more... )

There is a girl in New York City that calls herself the Human Trampoline
And sometimes when I'm falling, flying, and tumbling in turmoil, I say
"Whoa, so this is what she means"

OH MY GOD.

Stupid. Me. Sort of.

The End.

Oh wait, also, Happy Valentine's Day to all of you who don't believe it's just some commercialized ploy to blah blah blah whatever just go eat some chocolate and be happy that your LJ people love you. :-)

I WILL BE YOUR VALENTINE. SO PUT A CORK IN IT AND QUIT YOUR WHINING.

Glenn (the owner, CEO and elk-murderer) just went in Patti's office and told her to "for god's sake turn that music down".

He is my hero. Henceforth, he may call me "Leezer Geezer" all he wants.

OUR STATEMENT HAS A NEW LOOK! WE WILL NOW BE SENDING LASER STATEMENTS WITH TILED INVOICES! IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS PLEASE CALL!

OMG YAY!

VACATION ALL I EVER WANTED VACATION HAVE TO GET AWAY

From an episode of Designing Women

(Julia is in a televised debate with Commissioner Bricket, and already getting impatient)

CALLER: .........and I just don't think I could vote for someone like Mrs. Sugarbaker who is so obviously against school prayer.

JULIA: Let me say once again, that I am not against prayer.

BRICKETT: These people are ( Read more... )

Sister Christian oh the time has come
And you know that you're the only one
To say...

Okay.

Quote of the day:

"Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing."

~ Redd Foxx