I never have understood the suburban housewive's need to buy everything in bulk, and to be honest, I hope I never have to. I mean really, I don't care how many kids you feed sandwiches to everyday, how can you possibly use up a gallon jar of Miracle Whip before it expires? Let alone TWO of them ( Read more... )

Orihime ( Read more... )

Man, am I glad that’s over. Christmas that is. Well, the whole holiday season, New Years included. My mom just gets way too into the whole mess. It was nice spending some time with my dad though; he’s usually away on business (probably partly the reason behind my mom being so damn clingy ( Read more... )

Only he wasn't fighting giants, he was fighting a dragon ( Read more... )

The pouring rain is no place for a bicycle ride. You'd think I'd have learnt this by now, after years of attempts.

This one time, I was on an expedition out in the Rockies when it poured rain for three days straight. I have never seen so much mud in my life. It took me ages to just clean out my chain, let alone my gears ( Read more... )

Well, life has been pretty routine for me lately. It feels weird calling my job ‘routine’, I mean, its still wicked high stress, and high energy, and every day is different, and yet it still falls into a pattern of normalcy and I’ve gotten used to the demands. The human ability to adapt I guess ( Read more... )

Alright 311, riddle me this. How, exactly, does one accidentally receive or give a blow job? I mean…seriously. Hypothetically I guess, some guy is in the middle of jacking off and gets walked in on. That person trips, mouth opens in surprise and shock and conveniently lands on the guy’s dick. Then, the person who fell starts sucking away, why? ( Read more... )

I’ve been on night shifts lately and its really starting to fuck with my perception of time. I’m kinda starting to feel like a vampire but its kinda cool to see both sunset and sunrise every day ( Read more... )

Another car wreck today. I think those are some of the worst calls we get. This time it was a kid who hit a pedestrian. He smashed through the windshield. Seems his seatbelt hadn’t buckled properly so the lock released on impact. His shoulder was pretty mangled from the strap and his face was just covered with lacerations. It was really hard to ( Read more... )

I hate the newspaper. 'THUNDERBIRD ROCK - Scenes from the Punk Circus Known as the Vans Warped Tour - B2-B3' Fucking fantastic headline. Images of bands exploding on stage and highlights of a killer festival spilling the energy of the show all over the page in cheap ink burst in my head at that headline. So I bought it, the paper that is. Full of ( Read more... )