i refuse to overanalyze it anymore.
and i definately refuse to let you all make me feel any sort of BAD about it.
because it's NOT bad at all.

woah am I a mess

i need to stop letting myself get upset about this.
i need to stop sleeping until 3pm.
i need to practice.
and stop eating.
and go to the gym more
write my papers
and study for my finals
(i don't even know when they are)
but more importantly..
i need to stop overanalyzing this because i'm making myself a big fat mess over it.
and thats really it.

it's kind of scary how you live your whole life in such great detail...and so does everybody else. and they're all totally separate from you. and how can you really know very much about anybody because there's so much to every person.

i wish i could turn my brain off.

( Read more... )

if you know anything about the way i think (which you probably don't because no one cares enough to get into these kinds of things)... you know that i believe in the importance of self. because self is essentially the filter through which everhthing MUST go. you can't experience or know anything that doesn't somehow get pulled through your self. ( Read more... )

zach is my hero:

me: hiii
zach: hey
zach: just got back from seeing you know who
zach: (future husband and cello player)
me: YESSSSSSSSSS
me: HOT
me: right?!?!?
zach: lol yes
me: for real!?
me: i need your approval zach.
zach: yes
zach: tap that
me: yesss!!!

are in love with principal players in the philadelphia orchestra.

example:

Angela

( Read more... )

SOLD the FUCK OUT.
AND I DONT HAVE A TICKET.
FUCK.


( Read more... )

i will be unfat by thanksgiving.
and we will smoke a peace pipe.
what?
kthxbye.