Thank christ I wasn't actually chucking a spear at a lion because the way I handled things he'd be flossing his canines with my ball sack right now. Also, two points to anyone who noticed that I only followed up the "indiginous African boy" analogy and not the Star Wars one... Aw, what the hell ( Read more... )

Every young Jedi has to learn to build his own lightsaber just like every indiginous young African boy has to take down a lion with a spear. Tonight I believe that I can correct one of the bigger mistakes of my past. No punching middleweight anymore, it's time for the Big Show. Wish me luck, and may the force be with you.

The only time the heavens go silent is when I ask where my future lies. Not even God can tell me where I'm headed.

"I can’t see the end of me
My whole expanse I cannot see
I formulate infinity
And store it deep inside of me"

Everyone is equal. If something bad happens to you, then there's a good turn around the bend somewhere. It might be ten years away, but that good deed or stroke of fortune is one of the few things I still believe in, no matter how minor it may seem. What goes around, comes around and no good deed goes unpunished but those are all the idioms and ( Read more... )

I was thinking about how bad it would be if there was a large scale zombie outbreak and then I thought, "I bet nobody else in the world worries about these things as often as I do." And you know what? I'm probably right. (With the exception of the people that actually DO have to deal with zombies. I just say 'don't mess wid 'em ( Read more... )

There, I said it.

So, I was just sitting there, taking a piss, when I realized who was the first person ever to know me as the "weird" kid. It was my Great Aunt Annie. She used to holler at me not to climb her trees and always effectively cut me off from any type of passing hello. She knew I was the black sheep. Although, she was very old and somehow I get the ( Read more... )

"It really is that simple"
"if she isn't horribly fat and ugly, and if she swallows"
"that's the perfect woman."

"Oh she can't talk to much either,
cause that shit sucks"

N. Mela

My half-birthday is over, by the way. December 22, 2005 may you rest in peace.

Johnny Wishbone's six-month anniversary tour is just getting kicked off however, so if you want to ride the bandwagon, just ask me how.

:D

I'll never be able to truly describe the way I feel when I hang out with Steph but this much I can tell you: There is not another person on this earth that can fill her spot in my heart. She exhibits many characteristics that I wish I could harness and use for myself. I'm not really a stand-up guy and she's a stand-up girl. When I dated her she ( Read more... )