Twilight! 3
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TWILIGHT
CHAPTER THREE
SNOW: *is everywhere*
BELLA: GODDAMMIT. Oh well, Charlie’s not here and I can revel in the aloneness of being lonely.
READERS: LOL WHAT.
BELLA: I can’t wait to see Edward! Even though he lied about his eyes and that makes him suspicious.
READERS: LOL WHAT
BELLA: I notice that boys see me differently here. I bet it’s because I’m new and interesting and they think my only character flaw of being clumsy is actually not a flaw at all but cute and endearing. I kind of prefer being ignored, though... crap, two boys want me, my life SUCKS!
SCHOOL: Yay hi!
BELLA: Yay!
CAR: I KEEL U NOW, BITCH.
BELLA: OHSHI--
EDWARD: I SAVE YOU.
BELLA: Whut. Wait, weren’t you like four cars away?
EDWARD: Don’t be stupid, I was right next to you. You just hit your head and don’t remember. If you want me to explain later, I WILL, GOD, STOP NAGGING ME WOMAN.
BELLA: ... You’re pretty.
EMTS: Uh you hit your head really hard and we have to put you in a neck brace to protect you and get you checked out to make sure you’re okay.
BELLA: GOD THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. *takes it off when she gets to the hospital* NECK BRACES ARE NERDY AND NERDS ARE LAME.
GUY WE’VE NEVER HEARD OF UNTIL NOW UNLESS I FORGOT AND OH YEAH HIS NAME IS TYLER: I am so sorry I almost hit you!
BELLA: Eh, whatever. Edward is a very very fast knight in shining armor so I’m okay.
EDWARD’S TEETH: *are brilliant*
DOCTOR: ‘Sup.
BELLA: HOLY CRAP YOU ARE HOT.
DOCTOR: You can go home now, but not school. No point anyway, they’re all pretty much here in the waiting room. Just for you, I’m sure. Because you’re special.
BELLA: This is so embarrassing, the whole school knows I had to go to the hospital. What kind of loser does THAT?
TYLER: ...
BELLA: Oh well I’m all good now BECAUSE EDWARD WAS TOTALLY RIGHT NEXT TO ME. Right next. Like we were practically Siamese twins he was so right next to me.
DOCTOR: *looks around*
BELLA: YOU ARE SO IN ON IT, YOU BASTARD. Edward we need to talk.
EDWARD: Bitch I saved your life, I don’t owe you shit.
BELLA: Don’t bring logic into this!
LOGIC: :( I’m never here...
BELLA: You lifted a van up off of me! You’re Superman, goddammit!
EDWARD: You’re kind of dumb. Also, I’m not explaining anything to you, so get used to it.
BELLA: Oh this is SO going to become a cliche plot about hate and frustration turning into epic romance, you jerk!
EDWARD: Why did I even save you?
BELLA: I SAID GOOD DAY.
CHARLIE: HOLY CRAP ARE YOU OKAY.
BELLA: Yes, God, it’s not like a van almost hit me. People in small towns overreact to everything.
CHARLIE: Sooo uh... you’re going to need to call your mom...
BELLA: OH MY GOD I WAS IN A POTENTIALLY DEADLY ACCIDENT AND MY LIFE WAS THREATENED AND YOU TOLD MY MOM!?
CHARLIE: Uh, yes?
BELLA: YOU SUCK.
*later*
BELLA’S DREAMS: I love Edward, Edward + Bella, Bella Cullen, Isabella Cullen, Edward and Bella forever, etc etc
END OF CHAPTER THREE
---
Gasp! Why is Edward so dazzling fast like a freak? Will Bella find out and still find him pretty? Is there going to be a point to this book? Stay tuned!
Continue on to Chapter Four...
TWILIGHT
CHAPTER THREE
SNOW: *is everywhere*
BELLA: GODDAMMIT. Oh well, Charlie’s not here and I can revel in the aloneness of being lonely.
READERS: LOL WHAT.
BELLA: I can’t wait to see Edward! Even though he lied about his eyes and that makes him suspicious.
READERS: LOL WHAT
BELLA: I notice that boys see me differently here. I bet it’s because I’m new and interesting and they think my only character flaw of being clumsy is actually not a flaw at all but cute and endearing. I kind of prefer being ignored, though... crap, two boys want me, my life SUCKS!
SCHOOL: Yay hi!
BELLA: Yay!
CAR: I KEEL U NOW, BITCH.
BELLA: OHSHI--
EDWARD: I SAVE YOU.
BELLA: Whut. Wait, weren’t you like four cars away?
EDWARD: Don’t be stupid, I was right next to you. You just hit your head and don’t remember. If you want me to explain later, I WILL, GOD, STOP NAGGING ME WOMAN.
BELLA: ... You’re pretty.
EMTS: Uh you hit your head really hard and we have to put you in a neck brace to protect you and get you checked out to make sure you’re okay.
BELLA: GOD THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. *takes it off when she gets to the hospital* NECK BRACES ARE NERDY AND NERDS ARE LAME.
GUY WE’VE NEVER HEARD OF UNTIL NOW UNLESS I FORGOT AND OH YEAH HIS NAME IS TYLER: I am so sorry I almost hit you!
BELLA: Eh, whatever. Edward is a very very fast knight in shining armor so I’m okay.
EDWARD’S TEETH: *are brilliant*
DOCTOR: ‘Sup.
BELLA: HOLY CRAP YOU ARE HOT.
DOCTOR: You can go home now, but not school. No point anyway, they’re all pretty much here in the waiting room. Just for you, I’m sure. Because you’re special.
BELLA: This is so embarrassing, the whole school knows I had to go to the hospital. What kind of loser does THAT?
TYLER: ...
BELLA: Oh well I’m all good now BECAUSE EDWARD WAS TOTALLY RIGHT NEXT TO ME. Right next. Like we were practically Siamese twins he was so right next to me.
DOCTOR: *looks around*
BELLA: YOU ARE SO IN ON IT, YOU BASTARD. Edward we need to talk.
EDWARD: Bitch I saved your life, I don’t owe you shit.
BELLA: Don’t bring logic into this!
LOGIC: :( I’m never here...
BELLA: You lifted a van up off of me! You’re Superman, goddammit!
EDWARD: You’re kind of dumb. Also, I’m not explaining anything to you, so get used to it.
BELLA: Oh this is SO going to become a cliche plot about hate and frustration turning into epic romance, you jerk!
EDWARD: Why did I even save you?
BELLA: I SAID GOOD DAY.
CHARLIE: HOLY CRAP ARE YOU OKAY.
BELLA: Yes, God, it’s not like a van almost hit me. People in small towns overreact to everything.
CHARLIE: Sooo uh... you’re going to need to call your mom...
BELLA: OH MY GOD I WAS IN A POTENTIALLY DEADLY ACCIDENT AND MY LIFE WAS THREATENED AND YOU TOLD MY MOM!?
CHARLIE: Uh, yes?
BELLA: YOU SUCK.
*later*
BELLA’S DREAMS: I love Edward, Edward + Bella, Bella Cullen, Isabella Cullen, Edward and Bella forever, etc etc
END OF CHAPTER THREE
---
Gasp! Why is Edward so dazzling fast like a freak? Will Bella find out and still find him pretty? Is there going to be a point to this book? Stay tuned!
Continue on to Chapter Four...