So I just thought I'd stumble through live journal for old times sake...hadn't been on it in forever...and the last entry I read just put a knife to my gut. It's like I was so so close at understanding a valuable lesson, but no cigar. Almost exactly at this time I became pregnant, and from that learned the importance of settling for someone and how ( Read more... )

I haven't posted in....forever. I've thought about it, but all of the mundane things in my life seem more important at the time....the truth is, I haven't wanted to look at the truth ( Read more... )

AAdventurousMMysticalBBrightEEnchantingRRare NNeatIIrresistibleCComplicatedOOrderlyLLazyEElitist
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( I want a man with a slow hand, who will understand, if you want this woman's heart, you gotta take it like a man..... )

You know I really should've forseen this happening.  I figured my hatred was enough to carry it, and the seduction of the mind fuck.  But here I am and I'm the one who's head is being fucked with, and I can't figure out up from down or the truth from lies anymore.

I don't even know what I'm lying or telling the truth about, but I know how he makes ( Read more... )

Things that have happened in the last few days:

I had people over, was supposed to be girls in the beginning, ended up being Tony and Paul at first.  Yes I did say Paul.  It was awkward to say the least.  Eventually Paul was trying to act like a cool jackass and Tony was trying to look cool and have fun and laughed along and said, "That's awesome ( Read more... )

So today was uneventful, read on for some more entertaining boredom.....

I woke up and Bej said I should go shopping with him, chatted with a few people, then I went and spent all my money shopping when I was sure I could have self control and for a few shops I did, till we got to GAP and Aeropostale, damn those sales, they know exactly what they' ( Read more... )

So last nite I decided I was tired of the reenactment of the Battle of Little Bighorn.  I messaged Paul and this is how the conversation went.....

( baby steps...baby steps.... )

Today I hardly slept.  I made it in time to meet up with the british man, Wess about coaching soccer this upcoming season, then I caught a cab to the foodbank.  Walked in intime to straighten out the heinous line forming at the computer.

I don't know if it's a high I get pretending he doesn't exist, or if it's the woman in me trying to move on with ( Read more... )

You might be wondering what all has been going on, what happened with Paul, where I am in my life right now....some of those I have answers, others I am not entirely sure about.

( The Bahamas and how Princess's reign ended over Candy Cane land )