ahhhhhh
how strange it feels to be me sometimes

I feel like I need someone in my life again who gets me.
I have friends, great friends.  but I want someone who GETS ME. 
all of it.
and who I GET too.
yeaaa....
Im gonna need that to happen ASAP.  

i can not believe the show is over.  It feels so good ( Read more... )

damn,
I have some pretty big fucking walls up.
I am totally ready for them to be knocked down but it's so much harder than I thought it would be.
I really am trying though.
guess thats all I can do.

nice guerrilla everyone.  It felt right again last night....it felt new again in a way.  YES. 
woo!

and life goes on.

I dont like sharing my bed.  In fact I hate it. 
won't do it. 
and I dont like physical touch that much.
Does this make me a cold person?
I just dont like it.  makes me uncomfortable.

I feel like writing more but I cant.

alriighhhhtttt
peace.

it's opening night.

pray for me.

nothing feels right at all ( Read more... )

I never post anymore ( Read more... )

what do i need?
a grasp on my life.
out.of.control.

I've got to get my shit together.

I have had the most foreign thoughts come into my head over the  last two weeks  and I hate  them all.  And they are freaking me out. 
Thoughts I would  never think.  BUT I am thinking them.
...and considering them...
sigh
what the hell.

have not posted in AGES ( Read more... )

Ive lost complete sight of what I have to bring to the table.
I don't remember what is potentially 'good' about me.
it's not that I feel down on myself, it's that I have no idea anymore what there is about me to be 'up' about.
i miss my friends who made me feel important for the first time.  I feel like i need their help more than ever right now