It's hard to say this.  So I'll just go ahead and do it.  I'm not in love with my ex.  But it kills me to hear him ranting about some gorgeous little woman he's met.  Does that make me a bad person?  I want him to be happy but after my own personal life went somewhat pear-shaped, I'm just wondering if it's the desire to drag other people down when ( Read more... )

It hit me like a giant meat tenderiser.  People who work at Woolworths really ARE stupid.  Of course, this is a slight exaggeration as I work at Woolies and I know I'm not stupid, but the majority definitely are.  They curse at carboard boxes.  They talk to fruit.  They spend hours wondering how to cram an extra line of tinned tuna onto the already ( Read more... )

Customer: "Hi, can I please have some shaved honey ham?"
Me: "How much?"
Customer: "200 grams."
Me: (gets her ham)
Customer: "And 2 kilograms of cocktail franks."
Me: (pause) "Two kilos?"
Customer: "Please."
Me: (idle chatter and then...) "You must really like your sausage, eh?"
Customer: (takes parcel, gives me a nasty look and walks off)
Me: "wtf??"
Boss ( Read more... )

It was 6am when I had to start work in the Deli.  This is not an exciting thought, as I'd slept very little that night and felt like shite warmed up.  So I crawled out of my soft, warm haven and stood shaking in the dark.  "Farkin cold weather," I think, feeling for my work uniform, "I wish I could just wear my uggies to work so at least my feet ( Read more... )

The Phone Call

Here's how my day turned pear-shaped:
(Ring-ring-ring-ring-ring)
Me: "Hello?"
Mum: "Hi Louie (shut up, long story), Eckersley Medical just phoned to tell me you have an outstanding account of $100."
Me: "I beg your pardon?"
Mum: "Apparently you owe the doctor a hundred bucks."
Me: "Like hell, I do!  Did they say which particular consult ( Read more... )

I spent the day in the "Big City" yesterday and I discovered two things: 1) People don't care if you appear to be smiling at them, they will automatically write you off as insane and 2) It gets hot in the city.  Even in the wintertime so it's not a good idea to wear just a bra under your sweater.  This, I discovered, was a very expensive and ( Read more... )

There is a tall palm tree just outside Pizza Hut on the main road of Buderim.  I walk past it, occasionally under it, on my way to work.  I am always wary of birds sitting up there.  I never knew why that tree invoked a sense of discomfort as I approached it until I walked under it this morning- 4:45am, mind you. Out of nowhere, as if sent from the ( Read more... )

So this is what it feels like to be deleriously tired. hehehee... I went into work an hour early (silly me) to do a platter up for a customer (favour, which I will never attempt to do again) and I discovered with a groan that two workers had mysteriously fallen ill overnight (see, it MUST have been that ham) so it was me and Belinda, the "boss" who ( Read more... )

I'm so fucking tired- work's been riding me into the ground.  I was bosslady today and invoked the irritation of everyone on staff because I couldn't stop singing "Somebody Kill Me Please" as I was putting the loads away.  Oh well.  It wasn't too bad, I guess, except the place was overrun with customers who saw me as a mindless feeb with nothing to ( Read more... )

I found it in the most unlikely of places- in the exhaust of an old Holden Gemini. As the toxic fumes choked me I thought about life and what we'd spoken about. I realised that as much as I felt I could achieve great things, it was no use me just sitting there and postulating on my greatness without any proof or action. Like the exhaust of that ( Read more... )