Things can't always be about happy posts! There will come a time when you have to post a sad message. Tomorrow would have been Michelle's birthday. She would have been 36 years old. Yesterday I went in Haylie's bedroom to wake her up; she immediately looked up at me and said "Daddy do you ever feel like someone is watching you? I mean it feels ( Read more... )

I’ll Still Be me ( Read more... )

Today I had the anticipated meeting with my attorney. I had several questions running through my mind. It has been two months since Michelle's death. I have yet to be able to see or speak to my kids. My attorney complimented me on my patience and how well I was holding it together. I assured him that my patience is running VERY thin! He told ( Read more... )

So here it is the eve of my 33rd birthday, and I am STILL sick!!! I finally passed the damn kidney stone, yet I am not able to keep any sort of food and very little liquids down!!! I went in to work this morning and my boss sent me right back out the door. Her words were "you look green as a gord! GO HOME! and dont breathe on anything! See ( Read more... )

I am sorry that I have been out of touch, I have not felt the best over the past few days. I have been on the go so much and changed my eating habits and now I think my blood pressure is suffering! My head has been killing me for a few days now. I am going to make an appointment with a doc tomorrow ( Read more... )

Years ago when Rascal Flatts released "I'm Moving On", I instantly fell in love with the song. It was not just the song, but the words and the meaning of the song. At the time the song first came out, I was going through some rough times with Michelle. I had no idea how much meaning that song held and how it would be an instrument in my life ( Read more... )

Haylie was born on December 5, 2006. She was born premature. Things were going so well when she was born. I was working for Hospice taking care of a patient who was terminaly ill with lung cancer. I came in from work on a Monday morning to find that Haylie was very sick. Michelle needed to leave to run some errands so she took Hope with her ( Read more... )

Thank God Dr. Gayle gave me a script for something to help me sleep. I honestly had forgot about having something. Last night I took a half of one and drifted off to sleep. I woke up this morning, not to the wishes I made last night, but feeling a little refreshed. As I sat on my patio this morning having some coffee, I began to think about ( Read more... )

What is going on in my sordid little world?? A lot! My mind is filled with tons of thoughts and I am not sure how many of them I can actually talk about right now. Nothing has changed with my custody situation. I still work everyday and come home hoping that each day will be the day I hear something. The other day at work, my boss actually ( Read more... )

So where do I start??? I have been reading about others wonderful New Years Eve experiences. Let me tell you about mine. I stayed home. I had a few drinks by myself and watched a cheesey movie and was out before midnight. I woke up to the hardest day I have had since Michelle died. But, I made it through the week. I have become hooked on the ( Read more... )