One Piece: Bound For Glory - Chapter 10 Part 3:
He quickly hide behind Kit.
Brian: …You know, I don’t think he’s running from Karma because he honestly thinks she’s dangerous and should be kept away from society. He’s doing this whole melodramatic flailing and cowering to test Kit’s loyalty. Otherwise, why hide behind her?
He’s made it abundantly clear what he thinks of women’s strength, and out of all the characters we have seen, Kit appeared to be the weakest. Hell, if he was genuinely scared, he would be hiding behind Chase!
But he chose Kit, and he did so for a very specific reason. He’s playing it up like Karma is a strong psychotic woman going after him, and then hiding behind Kit to see what she would do in this situation. To see if she is genuinely loyal to him and whether she will risk her life to protect him…even though he never intended to do the same for her.
And he is demeaning a mental illness sufferer, one with a serious condition, damaging the little bit of confidence Karma has managed to build up in the years, all to test out his newest crew.
And soon, Karma will join him as well. Because, clearly, the man who treated you like the scum of the earth because you had a mental illness is the ideal man to work under.
SOCIOPATHY: 13
"What's wrong?" Kit said a little concerned,
Brian: PEOPLE ARE NOT POKEMON! People tend to remember being sexually harassed, nearly killed, enslaved, and then nearly sold for slave labour at the beginning of this VERY CHAPTER! And people tend to hold grudges for those sorts of things! WHY THE FUCK DOES SHE CARE ABOUT HIM? She might work for him because he’s made it very clear that he has no qualms about killing her if she doesn’t, but that doesn’t mean she is automatically going to be loyal to him and treat him like a beloved leader!
William: And he is scrambling back from some woman whilst shouting for help! What the fuck do you think is wrong? You were pretty astute in the last chapter! Put those two brain cells you have to good use, dammit!
"Aww you're so cute when you're scared!" Kit smiled as she began to hug David.
The Voice: IS SHE CONCERNED OR IS SHE GODDAMNED AROUSED? Those are very different emotions!
Brian: He is running away from something clearly terrifying, and the only thing she can focus on is how goddamned attractive he is? THIS GUY IS STRONGER THAN YOU! HE PWNED YOUR ASS LAST CHAPTER! IF HE IS SCARED ABOUT SOMETHING, I THINK IT’S HIGH TIME THAT YOU RAN!
The Voice: Well, it’s not like she ran when her opponent displayed that he is clearly God’s favourite kid…I think she was born without a sense of self-preservation.
William: And when has she ever shown herself to be the touchy-feely type anyways? In the last chapter, she was clearly VERY uncomfortable with David putting his hands anywhere NEAR her! Why is she shoving her boobs in his face now? Is it that, now that he has conquered her, she automatically finds him sexually attractive? Is it that no female can ever be around your Avatar and not lust after him?
ARE YOU DESTROYING THE SELF-ESTEEM OF THE SUFFERER OF A VERY SEVERE MENTAL CONDITION SO THAT YOU CAN GET A FACE OF BOOBS?
TOO DUMB TO LIVE: 12
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 16
YOU PREJUDICED BASTARD: 11
"Ahh...let go please! Kit...Kit!"
"Sorry!" Kit let go of David
Brian: Oh, so Riru totally deserves to get almost strangled, but as soon as a MALE objects, you immediately stop? Stuthor, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
William: And why does he have to beg at all? HE’S STRONGER AND FASTER THAN HER! He was fast enough to deflect freaking BULLETS! Why can’t he just elbow her in the ribs and extricate himself?
Brian: I think this is a legitimate case of him playing coy. Please if he really didn’t like it, the Stuthor would never subject him to it.
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 17
and quickly they saw Karma run up.
William: How can you see something quickly or slowly? I don’t think you can control the speed at which light reaches your eyes.
Brian: Why not? He’s already controlled momentum before.
William: *Facepalm*
Brian: But how far did he run? How far away was Karma? Kit had the time to coo to him, hug him for so long that he starts suffocating, listen to him protest weakly, and then apologise! The whole thing had to take a couple of MINUTES! As far as we know, he was still only a few paces from Karma! Why does EVERYONE in this fic move in slow motion?
William: Wrong. Every female in this fic move in slow motion, including the one who canonically has super speed. They have to do that, see, to avoid humiliating the protagonists, and also because no girl can ever run as fast as a MAN.
TOO DUMB TO LIVE: 11
"I said let me say sorry!" Karam yelled
Brian: Lady, he isn’t doing ANYTHING to prevent you from saying sorry! You can say whatever you like! All he asks is that you don’t get up in his face! Say sorry if you want to! It’s not like he’s duct-taping your mouth!
William: Why do you even want to apologise? He was a complete ASSHOLE to you! He freaking called you crazy! You were responding perfectly logically to him, and every insult was deserved!
as she came up with arms wide open.
Brian: BRILLIANT. Now, she’s trying to hug him as well. Every single goddamned woman in this fic wants to shove their boobs in the protagonist’s face. Stuthor, did you have a Stu checklist that you worked off of? Since when did apologies require HUGS?
William: And yes, that is a perfectly natural pose to run in. There’s no way she would run up to him and THEN open her arms. Nope, she LIKES drag and air resistance.
"You guys this chick is crazy!
The Voice: Yes, that’s EXACTLY the sort of thing to call someone suffering from a very SERIOUS mental illness. That’s exactly the sort of thing to RIGHT THE FUCK IN FRONT OF THEM. There’s no way you’ll hurt her feelings! It’s not like bipolar people cared what people thought, right?
YOU PREJUDICED BASTARD: 11
She called me an imbecile then wanted to apologize for it!" David explained.
Brian: …And that’s crazy…how? I tried to kill William, and later DID apologise for it.
William: Yes, but you’re not exactly the picture of mental health.
The Voice: Lots of people say things they don’t mean in emotional states, such as after someone has insulted them for having a mental illness, and some of those people do feel bad afterwards about it. This is not that unusual! If you’re saying that changing your mind is a sign of instable sanity, then every goddamned person on earth would be crazy.
TOO DUMB TO LIVE: 12
And of course a character who doesn’t know what schizophrenia means and is incapable of walking and thinking at the same time would know what imbecile meant.
"Okay...maybe she just felt guilty?" Avery suggested.
Brian: Yes, she felt guilty for snapping after a random guy showed up, hurt her, insulted her, tried to chat her up, and acted as though she was the scum of the earth for having a mental illness.
William: Well, this is actually a very reasonable suggestion, considering that he doesn’t know the context of the issue. How amazing, we have someone join the protagonists and still have a scrap of intelligence left.
"No, because when I ran away she called me an imbecile again and wanted to apologize..."
The Voice: That’s right! Nobody ever makes the same mistake twice and feel bad about it! If they do, it’s clearly a sign of insanity, and they clearly weren’t truly guilty the first time around! Nope, they’re totally bonkers. We should probably lock them up right now, because they’re clearly a danger to society and to be avoided at all costs.
And you really didn’t have to repeat the same phrase. You could have said, ‘she did the same thing again.’ That would have helped you avoid one more counter.
DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT: 3
"Again?" Chase asked.
"Yes."
Brian: WE FREAKING KNOW! YOU’VE REPEATED THIS THREE FREAKING TIMES NOW! WHY IS THIS DIALOGUE NEEDED AT ALL? WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT CONTRIBUTE? CUT THE FLUFF OUT! YOU’RE NOT WRITING UNDER A WORD LIMIT! GET TO THE POINT!
DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT: 4
"Maybe because you ran away like an idiot..." Riru pointed at David.
William: …Is that…Is that a backbone we see there?
Brian: Holy shit…she’s actually standing up to him.
The Voice: See what I mean now? Every time Riru shows up, she’s a completely different character. She’s like the Rosalie of this fic.
"I'm no idiot!" David yelled.
Brian: Sure, you’re not. Hey, what’s the purpose of cooks?
William: Yes, and do you know what’s the difference between the tail of a cat and one of a fox?
The Voice: And how about this? Are ships disposable items, or can they be used multiple times?
"You do have your moments." Riru commented.
Brian: Yeah, and this fic has been one long ‘moment’ from start to finish.
William: He has his moments in the same sense that I am mildly distrustful of strangers.
"What are you saying?" David began to butt heads with Riru
Brian: You can’t understand a single five-word sentence, and you have the balls to call yourself ‘no idiot’? *Snorts*
William: Butt heads? Great. Not only does he think Kit is an animal, he’s treating Riru like one too. And the Stuthor actually decided to completely shit on Riru’s character and make her RESPOND to being treated like an animal. How fucking fantastic.
The Voice: And because, yes, the girl who’s been doing nothing but wringing her hands and fretting and meekly obeying David for chapters is definitely the type to butt heads with him.
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 18
as they both argued back and forth.
William: Ah, so the one time Riru actually shows a backbone, the Stuthor glosses over the scene. He can spend hundreds of words rhapsodising on what a character is wearing at that exact moment, but cannot write a scene where a woman DARES contradict his lovely Avatar, in the process, denying one of his central characters much needed character growth. Why am I not surprised?
"Umm...is that idiot done arguing?" Karam asked,
Brian: Oh, so ALL the while, Karma’s been just sitting to the side doing absolutely NOTHING? Even your stupid depiction of bipolar disorder is set aside so the Stu can have HILARIOUS banter with a grossly out of character member of his crew. How long did she stand there like a stump and just watch that gross display of arrogance and ignorance?
William: Well, of course, she can’t interrupt until the Stuthor was satisfied. How else shall the readers EVER know of his MASTERFUL sense of humour?
"My name is Karma Silvers." Karma bowed.
Brian: WHAT THE FUCK? IS SHE ANGRY OR NOT? IS SHE AGITATED OR NOT? SHE WAS CLEARLY VERY DISTRESSED WHEN WE SAW HER! SHE WAS CHASING THE STU AROUND, ACTING LIKE SHE WAS ON AN AMPLIFIED SUGAR HIGH! WHY IS SHE SO CALM NOW? DID SOMEONE FEED HER SLEEPING PILLS WHILE WE WEREN’T LOOKING?
AND WHY THE FUCK IS SHE INTRODUCING HERSELF? SHE WANTS TO GET DAVID TO APOLOGISE TO HER FOR BEING A DICK, AS WELL AS APOLOGISE TO HIM FOR RAISING YOUR VOICE AND FORGETTING YOUR PLACE AS A PUNY WOMAN! WHAT PART IN THAT INVOLVES LETTING THEM KNOW YOUR NAME?
AND WHAT PART OF THAT REQUIRES BOWING? WHY ARE YOU FUCKING SHOWING RESPECT TO A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN NOTHING BUT ASSHOLES TO YOU?
William: The Stuthor had no idea how to write himself out of that mess, so he had a random time jump, so he can have Karma’s ‘bipolar disorder’ magically cured by the end of it, and have her all calm and amicable with the crew. See, the shenanigans are over and the Stu needs to wow everyone now, so he has to stop to slapstick somehow.
"I'm Kit." Kit smiled.
"I'm Chase M. Dragon." Chase gave a little nod.
"I'm Avery Wilson." Avery bowed.
"I'm Riru Sparks." Riru bowed
The Voice: WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING DOING? WHAT IS THE FREAKING POINT OF MAKING EVERY SINGLE GODDAMNED CHARACTER INTRODUCE THEMSELVES INDIVIDUALLY? IF YOU’RE GOING TO DO THIS, THEN AT LEAST MAKE THEIR INTRODUCTIONS UNIQUE! SO WE CAN GET TO KNOW THE CHARACTERS BETTER AND SEE THEIR PERSONALITIES IN PLAY! IF YOU’RE SIMPLY GOING TO COPY PASTE THE EXACT SAME LINE FOUR FUCKING TIMES WITH THE NAMES SUBSTITUED, THEN WHY THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN FUCKING BOTHER?
YOU ARE NOT WRITING UNDER A WORD LIMIT! NO ONE IS FUCKING INTERESTED IN THIS TEDIUM! MOVE THE FUCK ON!
DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT: 8
as she stood ontop of David.
Brian: I would object to physical abuse shown as signs of affectionate friendship…but after all the shit David put her through, including slavery and attempted murder…yeah, he deserves it. Every last bit of it.
"What did you do to him?" Chase whispered.
Brian: Why is he whispering? Are there people around that he doesn’t want to hear the conversation? Then you need to DESCRIBE that! You need to SHOW US THAT!
William: Well, it’s the Stu being humiliated here, so of course, everything has to be secretive. Even when they’re attacking the Stu, they’re still keeping his public image and dignity in mind. BECAUSE THE STUTHOR IS A WIMP.
"I took some of Kit's sake and threw it on his wounds." She said with a smile.
Brian: WHY does Kit have sake on her? In fact, just many things does she have? More than four knives, two guns, a pirate hat with a flag attacked, and now alcohol as well? Where is she keeping all this stuff? In the most pointlessly detailed description ever of her outfit, no bag or even pocket was mentioned! Where is she pulling this stuff from?
William: Isn’t it obvious?
The Voice: Okay, assuming that David had open wounds…those wounds are still BANDAGED! How is alcohol going to get through the bandages?
William: Why would he pass out from having alcohol put on his wounds, though? He had to have gotten it on them before for sterilisation! So why is this time so bad? Sake has a lower alcohol content then what is used to prevent infections! Or is it that Riru neglected to clean up his wounds as well? I honestly wouldn’t be surprised.
TOO DUMB TO LIVE: 16
"Nice." Chase grinned.
Brian: (Chase) I’m turned on just thinking about it!
William: Again, WHY are these guys still in his crew? They don’t fucking give a single SHIT about him. They don’t care period. In fact, they seem to actively despise him! You don’t work for someone who you dearly want to torture the shit out of! Why hasn’t there been a mutiny yet?
SOCIOPATHY: 19
"Owww..." Was all was heard from David.
Brian: Okay, if he CONSCIOUS, then why is he lying flat on the ground? People don’t tend to lie down like that when they’re in intense pain, I don’t think!
William: No. Truly horrible pain makes you tense up and curl in on yourself. It makes you attempt to make yourself as small as possible, not lie down on the ground and present a nice and big target to whoever is attacking you. If Riru is actually standing on top of him, then the only area she could possible balance on would be the torso. And having a heavy weight pressed on your torso also makes you instinctively curl up.
ONOMATOPOEIAS ARE COOL: 3
TOO DUMB TO LIVE: 17
"Hey Karma you wouldn't know where to find a ship now would you?" Avery asked.
Brian: …right, so that’s what they focus on. They don’t care about David’s warning that she’s crazy, they don’t care than an apparent mutiny is taking place, a BOAT, which they already have, is what they focus on. Nice priorities.
William: Like I said, his crew simply doesn’t freaking CARE. They couldn’t care less if they wanted to. Why are they still around? Joining a pirate ship isn’t entering a binding contract! If you cared that little about your Captain, how about you LEAVE?
The Voice: Then again, he’s the only one who seems to remember what the freaking plot of this chapter is. So, as stupid as his reaction is, it is moving the ‘plot’ forward, and I’m certainly grateful for that. Think about it this way, he’s basically pushing us one step further towards the end.
Brian: …Avery, I am forever in your debt. Until you start being an asshole again.
"Actually yes I would, I own one as a matter of fact." She smiled.
William: Really? HOW FUCKING CONVENIENT.
"That's great! We were looking for one!" David said happily.
Brian: What, he’s just FINE now? He has a PERSON standing on top of him and ALCOHOL getting into his wounds, and he can happily react to an innocuous conversation going on above him? Stuthor, have you ever been in pain before? Trust me, if you had sword wounds and someone was pouring ALCOHOL over them, and you had about 50 kilos of weight on your stomach at the same time, you will be FAR too busy screaming in pain to say anything, much less happily!
William: And if that still fails to penetrate your skull, then I will happily oblige with a demonstration.
The Voice: And notice how he immediately ASSUMES that she’s going to give him her ship, completely for free? All she said was that she had a ship in her possession, and that automatically translated to, ‘I have a ship, and I will be more than honoured if you just took it and set off. Really, I got the ship specifically so that you can plunder it off me.’ He doesn’t even consider that she had the ship for a REASON. That she might need the goddamned thing. Nope, she has a ship, she met him, clearly, the vehicle is destined for his use.
William: Not that he would be wrong…
The Voice: That’s precisely what makes this so infuriating.
FAUX MADE OF IRON: 2
SOCIOPATHY: 15
"I thought you didn't like her?" Kit informed.
The Voice: ASKED! IT WAS ASKED! IT’S A BLOODY QUESTION! IT HAS A BLOODY QUESTION MARK! SHE’S NOT TELLING HIM ANYTHING HE DOESN’T KNOW! SHE’S QUESTIONING HIS ACTIONS!
THESAURUS RAPE: 2
Brian: And no, he didn’t not like her. He was scared shitless of her, the little wuss.
William: And yes, not liking someone should definitely be a valid reason not to make them your ally, even if they have on hand a resource you desperately need. If they’re mean to you, or even slightly eccentric, that’s definitely grounds enough to completely shun them, no matter what they may have to offer to you.
YOU PREJUDICED BASTARD: 12
"She has a boat, lay off." David whispered.
Brian: Ah. So the only reason you bothered to be nice to her was that she was USEFUL to you. You definitely shouldn’t be polite or respectful of people because it’s a courteous thing to do! Oh no, that would be STUPID! Only be happy and chat with people who have something to offer you.
Sorry, you’ve spent your entire interaction hurting her, trying to chat her up because she had nice tits, and demeaning her because she had a slight eccentricity. WE ARE NOT BUYING IT. And I have no idea why anyone in-universe will buy it either.
The Voice: And did you think she’s deaf? Or blind? She’s standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU! There is no way she wouldn’t hear you even if you whispered something! And even if she didn’t, she would still see that you were saying something to your friend that you didn’t want her to hear! That coupled with the sudden 180 switch in attitude will clue anyone in!
William: That…is disgusting. Think about it, this woman allegedly has bipolar disorder and lives in a world where mental illnesses are not understood at all. She has to be outcast and shunned from a very early age. So, after putting her in a vulnerable state by treating her like she’s a horrible monster, he pretends to be nice to her to appeal to her desire for affection. He knows that someone like her will probably have no friends, so he sets out to completely undermine any scrap of self-confidence she has built up over the years, just so he can take advantage of her at her most vulnerable. And he does this all so that he can scam one of the most valuable possessions she has on her, for absolutely no reason. He already has a boat, he doesn’t need anything. He’s doing this solely because he’s too good for second hand products, and because he likes watching her BREAK.
SOCIOPATHY: 20
"So you forgive me?" Karma asked excitedly.
William: And she fell for it. *Scrunches face and sighs*
Brian: What is there to FORGIVE? You never did ANYTHING to him! He is the only one here who has to apologise! You did nothing wrong! He was the one being a bastard!
William: But don’t you see? Through all the psychological manipulation, David has made her think that she’s the one who’s at fault here, that her eccentricity was what caused all of this instead of his douche-ness. He’s set it up so that she will be vying for his approval and ‘forgiveness’. *Rubs hands over face and fights back vomit*
"Yeah...suuureee." David prolonged his answer
Brian: Otherwise known as the most blatantly sign EVER that he is reluctant to say this. Even when he’s obviously manipulating her, he has to make it very clear exactly what he thinks of her.
William: And what he thinks of is that he doesn’t forgive her. It doesn’t matter than he could have seriously hurt her and pretty much DID destroy her delicate psyche. Nope. She called him names, so he has a grudge against her now, and ever after she has clearly apologised, he’s still not willing to forgive her. That is how HEINOUS her crime is.
SOCIOPATHY: 21
as Karma hugged him.
Brian: Oh, her too. CAN THERE BE ONE FEMALE, JUST ONE, WHO DOESN’T SHOVE HER BOOBS IN THE STU’S FACE IMMEDIATELY AFTER MEETING HIM? THAT’S ALL I ASK.
"Well there's just one thing..." Karam said shyly.
William: And how she’s freaking SHY? *Groans* Stuthor, do you have ANY idea how much you’ve destroyed this woman’s psyche? When she first met David, she actually had a backbone. She actually stood up for herself. She didn’t take anything lying down. And now she’s reduced to a second Riru: meek, passive, submissive…hell, she’s hesitant to raise any complaint against the Stu’s ideas, even though it involves HER possessions.
You didn’t break her. You TAMED her. You’ve made her another one of your dedicated slaves. And this one? You didn’t claim her through force, oh no, that would be just CRUDE. You’ve decided to go ahead and completely destroy her mentality, her beliefs, her perception of the world, and warped her own mental illness, something she has struggled for years with, as a weapon against her, to make her devoted to you.
That is the kind of stuff we see on psychological horror shows, and you STILL expects us to see David as a freaking HERO?
FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU UP YOUR ARSE WITH A BASEBALL BAT.
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 20
YOU PREJUDICED BASTARD: 15
SOCIOPATHY: 25
"What now crazy lady!" David yelled already annoyed at what she was about to say.
Brian: …Stuthor, I don’t say this often, so listen carefully. I’m going to find you, no matter where you are, and I’m going to kill you, slowly and painfully. And this time, it won’t be because of an order. I’ve personally reached the conclusion that, no matter how complex and confusing morality is, there can be nothing wrong with killing people like you.
William: In fact, the world will be an INFINITELY better place if people like you died horribly and miserably. We will have a party after Brian’s done, and there shall be booze and celebratory orgies, because that is how joyous your death shall make the world.
The Voice: Yes, and when you get to hell, I shall be there, waiting for you, with all the torture implements that hell can find for me. And there shall be a line behind me, composed of billions upon billions of people, all eager to visit their own ideas of torture upon you. And there shall be a monitor recording the events and broadcasting it to all bipolar sufferers, and they shall laugh at your misery.
William: As well as all the women in the world, and all the men who have the decency to respect females and treat them like equals…as in, everyone who is not a psychopath.
YOU PREJUDICED BASTARD: 20
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 25
"I don't just let anyone ride on my ship.
Brian: (Karma) Only people who are actually respectful of me and not discriminatory towards a mental illness that I can’t help get to ride on it. Because, you know, I have self-respect. *Stabs*
I have to see if you're worthy."
William: (Karma) And you are most definitely NOT. You’re the fastest person to judge ever. Normally, it takes me a few days to decide. Thank you for being such an outrageous asshole that I can eliminate you as a candidate after 2 seconds of meeting you. *Shoots*
Karma backflipped back and landed in the splits.
Brian: (Karma) Yes! I shall be judging your worthiness by challenging you to an interpretive dancing competition!
William: (Karma) My years of training as an acrobat has no doubt equipped me for combat. For, surely, all you do when fighting is jump everywhere and do splits, right?
SHUT UP, I’M AWESOME: 3
DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT: 9 (Instead of back-flipping forward?)
All the boys titlted their heads.
The Voice: And here we present you, again, with the image of three people who are supposed to have distinct personalities acting in complete unison! *Thunderous boos*
William: I see that only the Men are ‘intelligent’ enough to be baffled by Karma’s hijinks. The women? Psh, they just stand meekly in the background and let the Big Strong Men handle everything. They don’t question anything! It’s not their place to do so!
YOU SEXIST BASTARD: 26
"Niiiicceee..."
Brian: Ah, I see that they have decided to prove their ‘worthiness’ by oogling her tits whilst she is issuing a serious challenge.
"Shut up!" Kit yelled as she kicked them all down.
Brian: Ah, and where were you when David was calling the mental illness sufferer ‘crazy lady’ and getting angry at her before he knew what she was about to say?
William: Sporadic displays of violence does not convince me that your female characters are strong, Stuthor. Especially not when they wilt and soften as soon as the Stu so much as glance their way.
"Ow!" Avery held his face.
"Ouch!" Chase held his stomach.
"Why'd I get hit there?" David whinned as he held his crotch.
The Voice: STOP FUCKING REPEATING YOURSELF! YOU DO NOT WRITE OUT EACH INDIVIDUAL REACTION! NO ONE FUCKING CARES! THIS STUFF IS NOT WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DESCRIBING, BECAUSE WE CAN IMAGINE THAT JUST FINE, THANK YOU! WHY DON’T YOU SPARE A FEW WORDS FOR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT? ACTUALLY TELLING US THE PERSONALITIES OF THESE CHARACTERS? OR HOW ABOUT JUST A FEW WORDS ON THE FUCKING SETTING? TELL US WHERE THEY ARE!
Brian: AND YOU GOT HIT THERE BECAUSE YOU’RE THE WORST IN THE BUNCH! AVERY AND CHASE WEREN’T THE ONES VERBALLY ABUSING A MENTAL HEALTH PATIENT FOR BEING DIFFERENT! THEY WEREN’T THE ONES THROWING DEMEANING NAMES AROUND! THEY WEREN’T THE ONES SCREAMING AND YELLING BEFORE THEY’RE EVEN SURE WHAT THE OTHER PERSON WANTS TO SAY! THEY’RE NOT PRETENDING TO BE NICE TO SOMEONE IN ORDER TO SCAM STUFF FROM THEM! THIS IS BARELY A MILLIONTH OF WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE! SO YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP AND TAKE IT! YOU WERE AN ASSHOLE, YOU HAVE TO FACE THE CONSEQUENCES!
ONOMATOPOEIAS ARE COOL: 5
DEPARTMENT OF REDUNDANCY DEPARTMENT: 11
SOCIOPATHY: 26
William: Not to mention, you clearly wanted it. If not, you were definitely fast enough to step out of the way, seeing as she kicked you last. No, you deliberately stood in place. Face it, jerkass, you were asking for it.
Brian: And this Stuthor has clearly never been kicked in the crotch. You can’t talk after that. NO ONE can talk after that.
William: Indeed. This is a very disconcerting situation. I do believe we should attempt to remedy it.
FAUX MADE OF IRON: 3
"Because I thought it be funny." Kit smiled.
Brian: …STUTHOR, STOP MAKING EVERY GODDAMNED CHARACTER SOCIOPATHS! THAT DOES NOT MAKE THEM ANY MORE AWESOME OR LIKEABLE! IT JUST MAKES US WANT TO KILL THEM ALL!
Kit here was being a halfway decent character by standing up to the Stu and hitting him for being a disgusting, prejudiced, sexist pig to a strange woman! She was doing what HEROES normally do! And you had to go ahead and ruin it by making her do it out of personal sadism instead of justice?
What is UP with you? Even when a shred of logic and decency creeps into your stories, you have to stamp them out with characterisation warping and stupidity! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING? DO YOU HONESTLY THINK THIS IS GOOD? IT IS NOT! IT’S DISGUSTING AND DESPICABLE AND MAKES ME WANT TO FUCKING MURDER.
STOP.
SOCIOPATHY: 27
Go Forward to: Chapter 10, Part 4
Go Back to: Chapter 10, Part 2