A Freak Like Me: Chapter 2, Part 1
Chapter 2:
SOS: Welcome to Chapter 2, gentle viewers! And with me is the always trusty BB! You ready for this?
BB: -Pops a cherry Jolly Rancher into his mouth- Let's spork a bitch.
SOS: The Author's Note, summary, warnings, and handholdy indices are copy-pasted from last chapter, spelling-mistakes and all, so I'm going to skip it. The only difference is, the Suethor now has TWO betas.
So, again, keep this in mind, guys! This story? HAS MULTIPLE BETAS
BB: And it still sucks like a leech attatched to your leg.
SOS: I searched for the second beta, but apparently, she's not located on either aff.net or ff.net.
BB: That worries me.
Chapter 1
When I woke up, I assessed my situation and sent out my newly discovered ability to determine how many beings were around me.
SOS: Because learning to use your abilities? What's that?
BB: Something canon. We can't have that here, y'know. Canon is BAD in Suefics. It kills the Stu and restores things to normal.
And, by the way, everyone? Why isn't he feeling this? Why is there no mention of a headache or any kind of drain or pull? Even Professor X, when learning to use HIS ability, got tired. Especially if he'd just controlled multiple minds to do anything. That's canon for almost any telepath. Or anyone with an ability linked solely to their mind.
It happens to almost ALL of them, and the only ones it DOESN'T happen to happen to be ALIEN MUTANTS. RARELY does it apply to human mutants.
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 2
I kept my eyes shut because the sterile light of the room hurt my retinas. There were roughly 150 beings in this compound, but only 5 were close enough to pose a threat to me,
SOS: Disjointed sentences, yay! I like bananas!
BB: Um....no.
At last count, Xavier had over three hundred students. His school for Gifted Youngsters was a former MANSION. The Xavier mansion, to be precise. It could hold possibly a thousand people. Especially considering it was also partially built UNDERGROUND. Where more rooms existed - not just training rooms. So there could be even MORE mutants there.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 1
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 3
none of them seemed to have been seriously injured recently, although there were some bruises.
SOS: So...does this Stu have an effective range at all? Because the compound sounds pretty damn big, and he's not even straining himself yet. And then there's how he sent the guards back to the labs, and yet could still control them...
BB: It is big. If you count only the upper rooms - and there are about four or five stories to this place - you probably have enough to house a hundred people.
And, keep in mind, this place is disguised as a boarding school. So people are also doubled-up in rooms. Sometimes even tripled.
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 4
There was no one but me in the room.
I turned my head from right to left to get an impression of where I was. I was in a lab.
SOS: Um...do I need to remind you that you still have your eyes closed? What, can you sense furniture now?
BB: Remember, SOS, this is a Stu. There's nothing he can't do, by Word of Suethor.
CONSISTEWHAT?: 1
“No” I whispered. Not again. I couldn’t stand it.
BB: You're missing a comma.
SOS: You know, I have a question. What does the medical bay of the X-Men in canon look like?
BB: Depends on the version. It's a rather nice room, stainless steel, slight blue tint. Lemme see if I can grab a pic.
I found one that shows the beds of the med room. Though, I must also warn you, it's got one of the best het pairings kissing on it. >.>
SOS: So, basically, this room is equipped with all manners of things to make sure the patient is comfortable, with mattresses on the beds and all...and yet it's exactly the same as the cruel and uncaring facility the Stu came from?
BB: I don't know anymore. Hell, I know that the X-Men make sure to keep everyone in the medical bay comfortable. They even kept Mutant haters there to help heal them.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 4
WANGSTMUFFIN: 1
I pushed myself off the bed, steadying myself on it until my legs could take my weight. “No” I whispered again. I could feel myself begin to loose control.
BB: Still missing a comma there.
SOS: WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE CONTROL IN THE FIRST PLACE?
BB: Stu.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 6
I couldn’t, wouldn’t, allow myself to be in another place like the Lab.
SOS: And yet you proceed to take no actions to prevent that from happening. Bravo. *Slow clap*
BB: Have you noticed something, Stu?
You aren't tied down. You're moving. No one's coming to stop you. So....what does that tell you?
You're obviously free to move around.
The X-Men (yes, we all know it's them) have given you the freedom to move around the room, and with everything as high security as it is, you won't be able to hurt yourself and nothing will hurt you (that's for the Danger Room). So how is this like the lab?
TRAUMA LLAMA: 7
SOCIOPATHY: 1 (Doesn’t that sound like he’s prepared to slaughter his way out of the lab, if he needed to?)
There were no beings around, so I walked to the door and opened it without fear.
SOS: Of course, someone who's lived in fear all their lives can just STOP feeling fear like that. Of course.
BB: Ugh....the emotions in this story are worse than the ones in Nicozilla. I never thought I'd be able to say that.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 8
The hall way was barren. Light ran along the floor and the walls in streams.
SOS: The light did WHAT?
BB: The hallways of the Xavier mansion are very well lit. There are lights along the top and bottom of the walls. So this is technically semi canon.
SOS: I was just saying, this Suethor sucks at describing things.
There was only one door on the left side of the hall and I headed toward it. I could tell there was no one on the other side of it.
SOS: So, basically, as long as no one is watching, you can do whatever the hell you want to, huh?
BB: ...Wait, what? ....Hold it.
Hold it.
The hallway outside of the Med bay goes straight and turns RIGHT. It doesn't go left.
Well, it does, but it's usually closed off because that's the way to the Danger Room. It'd be locked and under severe protection. I mean, it's DANGEROUS. It's fucking said straight in the name. I...this is a well-known fact! STOP SCREWING WITH THE X-MANSION!
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 5
SOCIOPATHY: 2
I could feel the energy of one being get closer and I knew that I would have to hide. I looked around frantically for someplace to hide but there were none.
SOS: Well, right back to the useless, screaming damsel as soon as someone approaches, huh? The only thing that tells me is that all the trauma and the fear you TRY to display? IS AN ACT.
BB: It's always been an act. It just hides the arrogant psychopath within. And it does that badly. VERY badly.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 9
I ran to the door down the hall and found some kind of unknown locking mechanism.
SOS: Well, at least there's that. I was afraid he was going to have the X-Men just have everything lying around.
BB: ...No. The X-Men didn't use "unknown" locking mechanisms. They used keypads, retinal scanners, voice print recognizers, thumbprint recognizers...They used things you would EXPECT a high security building to use!
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 6
My breathing sped up in my panic. The being was getting closer. I flew into a corner and sunk down on the floor, trying to make my body as small as possible. Maybe they wouldn’t notice me.
SOS: EMPTY. CORRIDOR. EMPTY FUCKING CORRIDOR.
BB: Okay, I'm going to point something out through visual aid. This is a hallway in the X-Mansion. It's from X-Men: The Last Stand.
As you can see, there are few places to hide. People could walk by and STILL see you. So, Suethor, how the FUCK would that work?
TRAUMA LLAMA: 13
I could feel the being was just about to turn the corner, and would be in visual range. I turned my head so I could at least see my doom coming.
SOS: You know, melodrama is the least effective way to convey emotion.
And, dude, if you can see the person approaching, WHY wouldn't the person approaching see you?
WANGSTMUFFIN: 3
BB: Very true. And I'm bored. Is this supposed to be interesting or something?
SOS: I presume so. But hey, look up, the first X-Men comes on stage right about...now.
A large blue furred male freak merkin in a white lab coat was the source of the energy and I relaxed slightly.
BB: ...........BEAST! Yay! I love Beast. He's a nerdy bamf.
In the Labs, the freaks merkins tried to look out for each other when we could.
SOS: Keep that in mind, readers.
BB: Or, rather, don't. Just remember earlier when he let the senseless slaughter of other mutants happen in front of him.
SOCIOPATHY: 3 (You seem to have a very odd definition of “look out for each other”)
Those like me, who had been there for a long time, would tell the new ones what the rules were, so they wouldn’t be harmed because they broke them.
SOS: What RULES can there be other than, 'Follow orders!'?
BB: Did that sentence make any sense to you? "So they wouldn't be harmed because they broke them." That....implies they WILL be harmed, y'know. It doesn't MATTER what you tell them, they'll STILL be broken.
Of course, that didn’t stop the guards from hurting them for no reason, but we tried.
SOS: So, basically, you were utterly useless. AGAIN.
WANGSTMUFFIN: 5
BB: As always.
....wait. Is he implying that Beast is useless?
SOS: *Smiles* Just read on.
CHARACTER BASHING: 1 (But yes, he is. I assume I don’t have to explain this counter.)
I hoped that this blue furred freak merkin would help me.
He stopped when he saw my curled up in the corner. I was confused by his slow cautious actions once he noticed me. Why would he be cautious? It was obvious that I couldn’t hurt him.
SOS: Ahem.
MASS. MURDER.
That is all.
BB: Nothing to add, SOS has said it all.
And, y'know, he might be cautious because YOU COULD BE AFRAID OF HIM! It's CANON that Hank is repulsed by even his OWN appearance. MOST people are repulsed by mutants with such a strong physical change. Even other mutants.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 16
CONSISTEWHAT?: 2 (I mean, it’s not like you spent the last chapter doing nothing BUT hurting people, right?)
He lifted one hand to show he was unarmed as he approached me. I looked at it, but didn’t understand.
SOS: EVEN THOUGH YOU JUST EXPLAINED IT IN YOUR OWN FUCKING NARRATION??? BULLSHIT.
BB: -Shakes head- The stupid just gets worse as we go on.
CONSISTEWHAT?: 3
TRAUMA LLAMA: 17
“Its okay, no one here will hurt you.” He told me. I scoffed,
SOS: Oh yes. I can tell you're filled with fear. Aren't you just such a traumatised little flower.
BB: I would repeat the fact that he's wandering around, obviously unguarded, completely free to go to almost everywhere he wants, but it'd be pointless.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 18
What kind of freak merkin was this? Did he really expect that I would believe that? Was he not going to help me, not going to tell me the rules?
BB: He IS helping you. He's letting you know he's unarmed and that he WON'T HURT YOU.
SOS: Dude, you have NO. RIGHT. You have NO FUCKING RIGHT to call ANYONE out for not being helpful or useful, WHEN YOU SAT BY AND WATCHED ALL THE MUTANTS IN THE LABS BEING KILLED.
BB: Couldn't have said it better myself.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 22
CHARACTER BASHING: 5
He sat down a few feet from me and tilted his head. I saw that he was wearing a coat similar to the ones The Doctors wore and assumed that he was a useful freak merkin, that he was the servant to someone important.
SOS: ...Or maybe he IS a doctor? You know, just saying.
BB: He IS. Hank is one of the best doctors in the X-Men! Jean is another of them.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 24
He was obviously my guide and I was expected to respect this freak merkin.
SOS: =.= I know what you do later, Stu. Don't you DARE tell me you're going to respect Hank.
BB: ...If he doesn't respect him, Hank will Beast out.
Thank you, Dr. McCoy.
I wondered if there was a chain of command among the freaks merkins too. In the cages it had been every man for himself after the initial welcome where we told the new freak merkin what the rules were.
SOS: So much for watching out for each other, huh?
BB: Already pointed out the fail of that, this just cements it.
CONSISTEWHAT?: 4
“Why did you leave? Were you scared?” He asked me and I nodded. Of course I was scared, I’d just woken up in a new place.
SOS: STOP TALKING DOWN TO HANK, YOU BITCH.
BB: I have nothing. Dr. McCoy?
TRAUMA LLAMA: 25
CHARACTER BASHING: 6
Was he going to tell me what the punishment for running would be now?
SOS: NOTICE HE ASKED YOU IF YOU WERE SCARED. That might indicate he didn't WANT you to be scared, you IDIOT.
BB: Oh, yes, the man who is asking after you with concern is going to tell you what your punishment is for leaving the damn bloody med room.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 26
He didn’t, he stood up and held a hand out to me. I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do with the hand.
SOS: Backhand yourself into a wall with it.
BB: I would think he'd want you to take it so you can stand.
SOS: Seriously, are you telling me in all the time with Mike or the first Doctor (who you called FATHER, by the way), they NEVER helped you up or anything?
BB: I doubt that. It happens instinctively.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 27
Sometimes the guards had done that when they wanted me to suck on their fingers.
SOS: I...what? Why????
BB: To prepare him, probably. Or to humiliate him.
SOS: But we see later that the guards never prepared him. He had no idea how fingers could come into sex at all. So...*Confused*
BB: Humiliation, then, is the best guess I have.
WANGSTMUFFIN: 6
I leaned forward and took two of his large purple fingers into my mouth, sucking lightly. He gasped and pulled them away
SOS: Poor, poor Hank, having to put up with this bullshit.
BB: Hank's fingers aren't purple. They're a very deep blue, like the rest of his skin.
And poor, poor Hank. -Hugs him- Having to be molested by a Stu. Everyone knows he's straight and madly in love with Mystique. First Class established that.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 29
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 7
YOU WHORE: 2 (For whenever the Stu throws himself at the canon characters.)
I curled into myself again. That had apparently been the wrong conclusion and now I would be punished.
SOS: And this is ALL about you. You don't see how much Hank is freaking out right now, because all you can think about is YOU.
>: ( Damn right, you're going to be punished. I'll personally smack a bitch if I have to.
BB: -Hands over a giant hammer- Use that.
SOS: *Hefts, then whacks the Stu through the building and 6 feet into the earth*
BB: Colossus would be proud!
TRAUMA LLAMA: 32
Instead the blue freak merkin asked….asked! me to stand and follow him. I knew better then to assume he was really asking
SOS: DUDE, at this point, you're actively refusing to see the OBVIOUS.
BB: Yeah, and it shows that he's actively begging for sympathy. And it makes me want to stab him through the heart.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 33
and followed him back into the room I woke up in.
He pulled out a communicator from his coat pocket and told whoever answered that I was awake. He called me ‘the patient’ and I wondered what that meant.
BB: It means you're a patient.
SOS: Ladies and gentleman--the man who claims he is a prodigy and has read and memorised a dictionary!
CONSISTEWHAT?: 5
Was it like project?
BB: .....How fucking stupid ARE you?
SOS: No. Patient means something completely different to project. That’s why those two words look different.
BB: Yes. It means that you're a PATIENT. You're there to be healed and helped and given the chance to go on your way, if you want!
CONSISTEWHAT?: 6 (Again, memorised a dictionary, people.)
Was this freak merkin a Doctor? If the freaks merkins had such high places in this Lab, then what did the Normals Beards do? I wondered.
SOS: Doctors were apparently the highest authorities from where you came from. This means mutants here? Are not under anyone's command--they direct their own lives. It should be BLINDINGLY OBVIOUS.
BB: It is, if you're smart enough to not want to just wangst needlessly.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 36
He sat me down on a bed and ran a few tests on me. “You seem to be healthy and your wounds have healed. Is that your ability?” He asked me. I considered saying no, hoping that without a healing ability, my punishments would be less severe,
SOS: Dude, the guards and Doctors back at your old facility CLEARLY didn't care if they killed a mutant or not. A healing ability just means you don't have to bear with injuries for as long as the others. STOP TRYING TO FISH FOR SYMPATHY.
BB: The worm's in the water, but I ain't bitin'. Hank is asking a very reasonable question. All mutants usually want to know what another one can "do" when they first meet. It happened in EACH. FUCKING. MOVIE.
WANGSTMUFFIN: 8
but he’d already noticed that my feet were healed. I nodded instead and asked him, “Do you think they will hurt me worse because I can heal?”
The freak’s merkin’s face twisted in a way I’d never seen before and he
SOS: --facepalmed and decided the Stu was a hopeless cause. And then he threw him through a wall.
BB: I have gotten tired of the word freak.
SOS: That’s why I’m replacing it with ‘merkin’. Try focusing on that-it makes the fic slightly more tolerable.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 38
WANGSTMUFFIN: 10
said softly, “No one will hurt you here.” I nodded, but didn't believe him. He was obviously not going to help me. I was on my own.
SOS: Kind of like how you left the other mutants on their own!
BB: ....HANK HAS DONE NOTHING BUT TRY TO HELP YOU THIS WHOLE TIME! He's been KIND to you. He's brought you here to help HEAL you.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 39
CHARACTER BASHING: 8
Once he was done with his test he told me, “The professor is at dinner with the rest, are you feeling up to meeting him?” I gave him a look of exasperation;
SOS: *SMACKS A BITCH* He had that COMING, dammit!
BB: Feel free to do it again!
Use this. -Hands you Colossus- ......HE'S MADE OF FUCKING STEEL.
SOS: Colossus, I choose you! Colossus used BITCHSLAP! It's super-effective!
TRAUMA LLAMA: 40
I knew better then to think it would matter if I was ready.
SOS: Which is why he ASKED you????
BB: Let's bring him out one last time. Colossus!
Colossus: *PUNCHES THE SUE THROUGH THE WALL*
BB: Nice goin', Tin Man. -Puts him back in his canon-
TRAUMA LLAMA: 41
He nodded and chuckled, which confused me, and lead me out of the room. He led me to a cylindrical beam, or what I thought was a beam.
SOS: That, dear readers, is this Suethor's description of an elevator. She's brilliant at painting mental pictures, huh?
BB: ....-Sighs-
The floor of an X-Men elevator.
You wouldn't think that was a "beam" from the outside. Look at those doors! They close just like regular doors. You'd think it was an ELEVATOR!!!!!!
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 8
TRAUMA LLAMA: 43 (Seriously? You don’t understand chuckling, even though you and Mike laughed together? And you don’t know what an elevator is, despite living in multi-floored compound?)
It opened as we approached it and the blue freak merkin stepped inside. The door closed with a hiss and I began to feel very closed in and claustrophobic.
SOS: ...And this never came up while you were in those tiny cages? Claustrophobia doesn't just come and go, you know!
BB: ....Actually, the elevators are rather big. Five people can fit in one comfortably.
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 9
WANGSTMUFFIN: 12
I flinched when he put his hand on my shoulder to try and calm me and he retracted it. I nodded at him in gratitude for the attempt and he smiled.
The only time I’d ever seen someone smile, even Mike, was just before they hurt and used me so when Blue smiled, I backed as far away from him as I could.
SOS: My GOD, you even have to turn SMILING into a source of wangst?
BB: ....I thought MIKE was someone who you ADORED? I thought he NEVER hurt you. ......GAH.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 46
WANGSTMUFFIN: 14
He sighed softly and the smile fell from his face. I was afraid I was going to be punished for backing away
SOS: Sighing softly isn't exactly a sign of 'RETRIBUTION!!!! SADISM, BWAHAHAH!'
BB: HE HASN'T PUNISHED YOU. NO MATTER WHAT! AND YOU'VE ALREADY BACKED AWAY FROM HIM!
TRAUMA LLAMA: 47
and decided that it was better to acquiesce then be seen as a rebel.
SOS: Gah! Gethsemane flashbacks!
BB: -Pat pat- Calm down. She isn't the Suethor this time.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 48
I moved to kneel at his feet but the door opened and Blue walked out the door.
SOS: Yes, Hank! Run away! Run as far from the Stu as possible!
BB: Ruuuuuuuuun! Run and get Professor X! Have him exterminate this thing!
TRAUMA LLAMA: 49
YOU WHORE: 3
I followed two paces behind him, as I knew was expected, shivering with fear. I hadn’t had time to show Blue that I could be a good freak merkin. I just knew he was going to tell this Professor I was bad.
SOS: At this point, Stu, you're just being INSULTING.
BB: -Growls- STOP THAT, YOU DAMN ASSHOLE. STOP TALKING DOWN TO THE AWESOME MUTANTS!
TRAUMA LLAMA: 53
WANGSTMUFFIN: 16
I whimpered and Blue must have heard me.
He turned his body slightly and said softly, “I promise, no one here will hurt you. I won’t let them.” I was conflicted.
SOS: YOU. ARE. DESPERATELY. LOOKING. FOR. EXCUSES. TO. WANGST. So sorry, NO SYMPATHY.
BB: I have nothing. Not a thing. I'm too mad. So I'm going to imagine Hank ripping the Stu's head off right now. He has been able to do that before.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 54
I knew saying “I promise” was an order to comply and was usually followed by laughter when they did just the opposite, but Blue said he wouldn’t let them.
SOS: I have no idea what the hell he just said. Did that sentence make sense to anyone?
BB: I think I have it.
He means that the guards said "I promise" often and meant it solely as an order that he had to comply to, and, of course, they never kept the promises. Hank said he wouldn't let anyone hurt the Stu here, though, so he's conflicted, I guess.
SOS: But Hank isn't trying to make him comply to anything here! So how does this even work?
BB: Hey, I never said it'd make sense.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 55
No one ever said that, and I didn’t know what it meant.
SOS: =.= The stupidity. It BURNS.
TRAUMA LLAMA: 56
WANGSTMUFFIN: 17
BB: We need something to heal the stupidity.
SOS: We do.
BB: I have just the thing!
SOS: Oh?
Click to viewNostalgia Critic always makes it better!
I nodded, but I knew he could still see my wariness.
“I will prove it to you little one.” I focused on his eyes. Sometimes I could tell from the eyes if the guards were pretending, or making a ‘suggestion’.
SOS: THEN. WHY. THE. DISTRUST???
BB: Because it causes angst.
CONSISTEWHAT?: 7
TRAUMA LLAMA: 57
Blue seemed to be honest. But what could he do against normals beards.
SOS: At least he can use question marks properly!
BB: ..........HELLO? BEAST. HE IS A BEAST WITH AMAZING STRENGTH! HE. IS. AWESOME!
CHARACTER BASHING: 9
Maybe Blue was like Mike. I smiled at him and Blue’s face beamed with joy.
SOS: The rest of his body fumed with anger.
BB: Didn't you just say Mike USED YOU? CONSISTENCY. PLEASE HAVE IT.
CONSISTEWHAT?: 8
YOU WHORE: 5
I could feel many more beings on this level; most seemed to be children, younger then me, and smaller then me. A good many of them were on other levels but there were 12 sitting in a room that Blue seemed to be leading me to.
SOS: *Blink* Did he just say the X-Men were children who were younger and smaller than him?
BB: Uh.....no. Most of the X-Men were teenagers. Only a few were children. Perhaps twenty percent of the class? The rest were TEENS. Because Mutations showed up after PUBERTY.
SOS: And the room he’s about to walk to is filled with ADULTS, anyway! You know, people like Professor Xavier and Wolverine and Jean and Cyclops…
CONSISTEWHAT?: 10
CANON: UR DOIN’ IT RONG: 11
Go forward to: Chapter 2, Part 2
Go back to: Chapter 1, Part 2