wow. i just paid off my citi card. i have had that thing for almost a year now and i finally paid it off. i feel pretty fucking proud of myself. now i just gotta get the discover card and the rents paid off before august.

today was a pretty shitty day. i feel like i've ruined my life. i feel so irresponsible. will was so nice and supportive about everything but i know he's scared too. this just sucks really bad. the part that sucks so much more is the fact that i have no best friend to talk to about this. i have no one but him that i can tell and not be judged. i ( Read more... )

i am really happy that some people just have absolutly no problem with not being in my life anymore. i would have figured that by now we would have talked about our issues since its been a month and all but no. you don't have the balls to say shit to my face. well go ahead and be with your "best friend" that didn't even speak to you until recently ( Read more... )

i fuckig hate how girls always have to run their mouths. especially about something this stupid. thanks alot.

how do you know when to give up? when its just not worth the effort anymore? when they stop careing about you and want nothing to do with you besides a good lay... thats what i'm trying to figure out. if you want to fix something, you fix it. if you want something, you go get it. i don't understand whats so hard. stop being a grouch and start ( Read more... )

so i went to dallas again. this time was pretty good. we had a suprise party for jorden and i was probably the biggest suprise cuz jorden overheard erica on the phone with some girl and kinda figured it out before she got there. i had a ton of fun with will, but i'm begining to wonder if anything will ever happen. i figure i shouldn't push it until ( Read more... )

ahhh so glad christmas is over! the only good thing that came out of it was that all my gifts were major successes. lets see... i got jay a brand new 7" vinyl (the "jesus christ" single which is his favorite song) and he was damn near speachless, i bought heather a purple necklace with matching earrings (she is still ranting and raving about how ( Read more... )

i can't do this. i can't. i can't.
i can't handle not knowing what he's doing or what he's not. i should have never gone. now i have that feeling in my stomach again.

the answer to that question would be moving back to san antonio. i'm stuck in a house with my parents and i'm almost 21 years old. oh and did i mention my friends are alllll sucking lately? i'm super glad my best friend left me for his new girlfriend and she also dumped me for him. my other best friend is too busy for me cuz she works too much. and ( Read more... )

so this whole work/school thing is KILLING ME. i don't know how people manage to be a full time student and work full time and have a life. i can't not have a life again. its too depressing and i am no longer that girl. never again will i be that girl that can only focus on one thing. i want to be a well rounded person. so far school has completely ( Read more... )