I don't relate well to others, she said. She said it over and twice over that. She finds herself not relating to herself anymore. Poor child. Poor child with sinew for strings. What happened to the chiseled glass that once was there? What has happened to the unmovable fortress that stood around her thriving soul - if there was one at that? ( Read more... )

I miss it here. No one watches that closely. Not many people listen to the incessant ramblings of a mad woman. I can feel myself. Alone. In complete solitude. I should come here more. To escape. To just be. I don't really know why I focus so much attention on the other journal when, in reality, this is the most important one of the bunch ( Read more... )

Coo.
Coo.
Purr.
Purr.I hear the ins and outs of their breathing. Sweet little slumbering creatures. They stretch out in their sleep and then bring their precious little paws in closer to their small bodies, hugging themselves tightly in their peaceful dreams. They are adorable. I don't need anything else in the world besides them. They are ( Read more... )

Last weekend, I took acid for the first time since I was in high school. I am not proud of this fact. My body is profoundly aware of that fact. And my head, oh...she is putting me on the biggest guilt trip that oneself could ever bring upon oneself ( Read more... )

The actual tragedies of life bear no relation to one's preconceived ideas. In the event, one is always bewildered by their simplicity, their grandeur of design, and by that element of the bizzare which seems inherent in them.
- Jean Cocteau, Les Enfants Terribles

I don't know where I have gone.
Flesh is no longer flesh.
I never knew I had such strings and sinew.
Touch is no longer touch.
Cadavers.

I am too tired to sleep ( Read more... )

Rain and Snow ( Read more... )

Depression has taken its toll on me ( Read more... )

Meow.
Dribble Dribble Dribble.
FUCK.
MEOW.
Why don't you listen? Why? Understand yourself. You make me sick you pathetic fool.

I am going through one of those moments. Those moments in time where you think that you are the ugliest and fattest creature alive. I want to blame it on female hormones. Yet, I am unsure if that is true. I fear ( Read more... )

We watch each other...

Me and the filthy creatures...

They tell me things.

These filthy creatures and I.

Filth is only colored on the outside. The interior remains clean and untouched.

Untarnished.

Innocent.