i'm better than everyone. i kick ass at everything. the other day, someone cut me off on the freeway, so i sped up beside him and i rammed him off the road. nobody is as good as i am ( Read more... )

i still kick way too much ass.

well, it was fun while it lasted, but i'm calling it quits. this whole "crusade" is exhausted. i know what you're thinking: "yeah, we showed him." you're right, i think i'm gonna go cry myslef to sleep over the fact that you think i'm an asshole. i know i'm an asshole, that was the whole point. though you shouldn't get your hopes up just yet. i'll ( Read more... )

i don't want it to seem like i'll be updating this shit every day, but just for the record, none of you hate what i'm doing. in fact, i think deep down inside, you all love it. that's why you losers keep coming back and commenting. everyone has opinions, right? well my opinion is that you're all a buncha pansy-ass bitches. but since it's coming ( Read more... )

i actually wasn't gonna even bother with this one, but i'll do it anyway. since i've started this "aggressive campaign," as you jokes like to call it, i've recieved a few nasty emails. i usually just laugh a deep, manly laugh (much like a lumberjack) at the sheer stupidity of them. but one in particular made we wanna blow my brains out. here's a ( Read more... )

that's all i have to say. just...wow. i've totally lost all of what little respect i had for you oyster bay kids. some asshole's parents called my mom this morning to tell her that i made a nasty remark on her journal. i say "her" because i don't think any guy, no matter how gay, would do something like that. are you kidding me? i'd be embarrassed ( Read more... )

yeah, so i updated again. eff you. the new rule is this: if i have something awesome to say, i'll just make a crappy update and then go back to kicking ass ( Read more... )

seems like a lotta people wanna know why i won't update my "journal" daily. who the hell cares? every day, it's the same goddamn thing: i wake up, take a 20 minute shit, flush twice, and then go into the kitchen and drink some water as i contemplate which condiment i'm gonna eat for breakfast. sometimes if i have milk, i'll eat cereal because it ( Read more... )

i created this dumb account so i can post comments on people's stupid diaries that nobody reads (or cares about, for that matter). bottom line is, nobody gives a shit about your trivial and boring life. shut the hell up. and if you're a guy with a livejournal, you are less of a man ( Read more... )