everything just gets to me more and more these days.
it's a sinking feeling, all the time.

it is like waking up every morning with this grey feeling of certainty in the pit of your stomach that the plane is going to crash before you realize that you are not even flying.

( Read more... )

i am cutting up poetry in the shapes of big clouds on my walls. they will rain teardrops painted on cutouts from unfortunate and dull newspaper articles. from the ceiling in another corner a glow-in-the-dark galaxy hangs from pink sewing threads. i have a mirror i am surrounding with pictures of the people i lovelovelove. lily, if you do come to ( Read more... )

there are far too many things to need in the world.
and there arent always people to pick up your pieces.


( Read more... )

i have had an epiphany and discovered why i feel so tense, so energized, so nervous, so alone.
why i sit in my classes thinking ohmygod i am going to scream or explode or melt and i cant get through the next 70 40 20 10 minutes of this. how is everyone else sitting there so normal, cant they tell how draining everything is? i was a mess a the end ( Read more... )

i can smell fall in the air and it brings back memories of what it was like when we were new.
suddenly you are always my first thought in the morning again. how shy we were.

there is a weight, and taste and smell to missing you.
and after all this time, it hangs over me still.

i have a very bad feeling down to the depths of my bones about this school year starting in a couple days.
the knowledge of how irrational that is does not calm my nerves.

i had a good summer. yay.

what a miserable week.

♥

( Read more... )

basia bulat - i was a daughter
the concretes - cabaret

fill yourself with dreams.

i am studying for my permit test and it sucks.
i have attention problems, leave me alone! gaaah.
i dont like cars, anyways. they make me nauseous.
i want cotton candy. i want neon lights and something new.
i collect pretty memories.
xx.