everyone is having breakdowns at the moment ( Read more... )

i've eaten so fucking much today. its repulsive. i need to vomit. im too scared. it will never ever go away. god i wish i was dead.

mocks are in two weeks. i had french today. i failed. i know it, i can't handle it. im so out of control, im fat, im hatefilled, im hurt and tired. i can't deal with this all at the moment ( Read more... )

i can't believe it's september already. so much has changed since i last blogged, but then in the end i suppose nothing has changed at all ( Read more... )

aparently my BMR is 1890.5 and i can have 2268.7 calories a day to retain my current weight because i burn that just by living. A i doubt it and B then y arent i losing more ( Read more... )

yes! only one day of school left for the term. 2moro i have work after school and then im going partying which gives me perfect excuses to skip dinner (i had it on my break) and will completely avoid the after schol binge... plus when im drunk i can easily purge and people will think i just drunk too much. things are looking up. tonight is joshes ( Read more... )

this weekend has actually been a successful one ( Read more... )

today has been a reasonably successful day as far as food goes - iv stil eaten WAY too much... but given the circumstances and my previous spell of uncontrollable b/p today was bearable ( Read more... )

curses on these fury filled tears of april. friends aren't friends. im still fucking fat. why oh why can't i die. i seriously have nothing left. tomorrow will come, another day, shared lunch, shall hold back. starvation is my only delight.

i am so hysterical right now. i've just been out bowling with some of my friends, felt horrendously fat the whole time i was there, so i started texting my gud mate innes, who i haven't talked to in quite some time, he was waiting for his girlfriend and sitting out on the wharf watching the stars, he asked me to come down cos he was lonely... i was ( Read more... )