Comments | suffolkgirl: Promises 6 / 17

suffolkgirl

Promises 6 / 17

Sep 20, 2006 23:46

Chapter Six

When Lee woke he was warm.

The sensation was so foreign it didn’t register at first. It was never warm in the cave. No matter how many blankets he wrapped himself in, he always woke cold and clammy.

Not today though. His back was still a little chilly, but his front was snuggled against something soft and warm.

He opened his eyes ( Read more... )

bsg fic - promises

Comments 10

promises 6 anonymous September 21 2006, 02:38:41 UTC

Wow! I don't even know where to start. So much was covered in this chapter ( ... )

Re: promises 6 suffolkgirl September 21 2006, 11:03:35 UTC

Wow! I don't even know where to start. So much was covered in this chapter.

Well, I'm starting to move on to the next stage of the story. Now I've set up the situation, it's time for things to happen, and so we find out that Lee has things to do and scores to settle.

I like how you get Gaets back to the caves--now Kara can really find out what happened with both Lee and Dee. I always thought from the show that Dee and Gaeta were good friends, and I like how you use it here. With all their talk about payback, I'm even more interested in what happened.

I like Gaeta, and I liked the idea of him and Lee bonding over Dee's death. Lee really does need some friends besides Kara, as well!
Also I needed a character who was primarily Dee's friend and really cares about *her* to give a different perspective.

And I can see Kara getting through Lee's defenses already, even if he doesn't...

Great! I'm trying to show that her presence is chipping away at his defences, ever so slowly, so it seems I am conveying what I want to.

I am ( ... )

starbuck042786 September 21 2006, 03:42:16 UTC

Well isnt that just interesting... Theres so much new information here, I had to go back and read it twice to make sure I didnt miss anything ( ... )

suffolkgirl September 21 2006, 11:23:35 UTC

Well isnt that just interesting... Theres so much new information here, I had to go back and read it twice to make sure I didnt miss anything...

Good, this chapter is supposed to raise new plot points and shift into the next phase of the story. Let's just say Lee has been doing more than just being depressed in the last few months, and he and Gaeta are definitely up to something.

I had a mini squee at how a little of Kara's warmth stayed with Lee. I had hoped that his walls might have started melting a tad already with her around, but by the end, I suppose I was wrong. Much hard work ahead I fear.

Well, he did think during the meeting that it was good to see her again :-)
You notice however that subconsciously Lee is reacting to her, reaching out to her in his sleep...

The way Hot Dog, Apollo, and Chief all joked about what the Cylons did to them was acutely disturbing. But I suppose laughing it all off might be a bit easier than actually DEALING with it.I could see them all using black humour as a coping mechanism - "if you don' ( ... )

centaurea September 21 2006, 17:46:56 UTC

I loved the exchange at the showers. It's so interesting that they can joke about it during the day and gloss it over with their pilot bravado, and yet wake up screaming at night. It really speaks to their humanity. And how young they all are.

And finally.. NO, LEE! DON'T DO IT!!

suffolkgirl September 21 2006, 18:55:29 UTC

And finally.. NO, LEE! DON'T DO IT!!

LOL. I have a feeling you're going to be shouting that a lot during the rest of this story, thinking about what's coming up.

tracyj23 September 21 2006, 18:58:08 UTC

Finally I get a chance to reply - it's definitely rare that I only read a chapter once and comment right away. Doesn't seem to be happening much these days ( ... )

suffolkgirl September 21 2006, 19:23:19 UTC

horrified I presume because that was exactly HOW he wanted to wake up. And probably figured she'd deck him for it if she'd woken first. :)

Yep, that's pretty much spot on :-)

Lee doesn't understand how everyone else trusts his father blindly, so he has difficulty with it.

I also think it's that where everyone else sees Admiral Adama, Lee just sees his dad, so he doesn't see him as this infallible figure that everyone else does.

Glad you like Lee and Felix, I enjoyed writing their friendship - Lee really needs a friend in this story.

i_am_girlfriday January 14 2007, 19:31:14 UTC

Oooh! Waking up warm and cuddly! Yay for that! I think his wall is getting a few cracks in it :)