This whole entry just bitch slapped my Red Flag Meter. I honestly do not know what to say, other than the fact that Moon is right, that you are breaking your back financially is so full of WTF I don't know where to begin.
I don't know the guy or anything about him, but this smells off to me,I'm letting my own bias of men I don't know get a word in here, sorry.
If I were you I'd be treading very carefully, but 260 bucks for someone who isn't being upfront is a lot to sink into a flop. Christ I am not helping, I'm sorry sweetie.
Well, I'm being the unusual opinionated Scottish Cow here, but seriously, if you're pissed at him, then I really don't think Dawn, meeting him is a good idea at all -_- at least, not until he gets his act together and pulls his head out of his arse.
I am not talking about you as if you're not here sweets, honest.
Well, the whole thing has had red flags for ages. The boy has issues, and apparently being limp and wibbly is a major one. Ugh.
Okay, how about this... Wait until the day before the deadline to cancel the room. See if he contacts you at all between now and then. If he doesn't, try ONCE to contact him and find out WTF is up. If you aren't satisfied by his response and still feel weird about his behavior, cancel the room and tell him he can find another place to stay -- without you.
My guess is that he's spineless and incapable of standing up for himself, so the chick he's staying with is preventing him from having outside contact. Add to that a healthy dose of being strongly influenced by his immediate environment and the people surrounding him, and thus changing his feelings and opinions every five minutes.
Honestly, this kid needs a mother and a therapist, not a significant other.
Honestly, right now I am not at all sure I want to wait until the day before the deadline to tell him to stay the fuck out of my city and away from me. If Cynthia is right, he has been flatly lying to me for months, and that is a fucking no-go for me. I will take a lot from people I care for, but not this, not lying or using me.
I'm getting the impression from all of this that he's telling each person something different -- and not because he's willfully, intentionally lying, but because he's a wimpy waffler who (1) feels the need to tell people what he thinks they want to hear and (2) changes his mind every time he talks to someone different.
The boy needs to grow and spine, and FAST. But it's unlikely that he will, because it sounds like he's become a bit addicted to playing the victim. Like I said; he needs a mother and a therapist, not an SO.
I have confronted him before with the fact that he tries to figure out what I want to hear instead of just being up front with me, so I have no doubt that your assessment in that department is spot on.
Ok, this obviously has a whole load of history that I can't unpack at the moment, but the advice I would usually rely on is: Talk to the person, express goodwill, ask his needs, state your own, and keep confidences. And if someone can't handle that, then forget it.
(Not that I've not failed to live up to these ideals before, but I'm trying, dammit. Getting involved with people who guilt-trip you or have great expectations that mustn't be disappointed is the first problem, there.)
To be honest, I am going to wait until I hear from him to make any decisions, but given my financial situation, I am pretty sure that no matter what happens, I am canceling the reservation at the Kennedy School tomorrow.
You are such a sweetheart, Jay, counseling calm and understanding when everyone else is telling me to go into "vengeance is mine, saith the Dawn" mode.
Calm and understanding doesn't have to be exclusive to standing up for yourself, not being taken advantage of, &c. I don't advise you to let yourself be walked over. No one should ever take each other for granted, and it seems like there's a fair amount of this going on here, on more than one side. What do you want - or need, or expect - from this guy?
I don't need anything from him, and all I have ever really expected was honesty. As for what I want, the extent of that is hard to know without meeting him, but I'm not about to pretend I don't want him sexually. Awkward little geeks are a right turn-on, and he is quite... compelling, on a personal level.
Hey! I saw what you did there! You're supposed to be my friend, and take my side in everything, no matter how bitchy and petulant I get. *pouts*
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I don't know the guy or anything about him, but this smells off to me,I'm letting my own bias of men I don't know get a word in here, sorry.
If I were you I'd be treading very carefully, but 260 bucks for someone who isn't being upfront is a lot to sink into a flop. Christ I am not helping, I'm sorry sweetie.
I want to say RUN RUN AWAY AS FAR AS YOU CAN. :(
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I am not talking about you as if you're not here sweets, honest.
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Okay, how about this... Wait until the day before the deadline to cancel the room. See if he contacts you at all between now and then. If he doesn't, try ONCE to contact him and find out WTF is up. If you aren't satisfied by his response and still feel weird about his behavior, cancel the room and tell him he can find another place to stay -- without you.
My guess is that he's spineless and incapable of standing up for himself, so the chick he's staying with is preventing him from having outside contact. Add to that a healthy dose of being strongly influenced by his immediate environment and the people surrounding him, and thus changing his feelings and opinions every five minutes.
Honestly, this kid needs a mother and a therapist, not a significant other.
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The boy needs to grow and spine, and FAST. But it's unlikely that he will, because it sounds like he's become a bit addicted to playing the victim. Like I said; he needs a mother and a therapist, not an SO.
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(Not that I've not failed to live up to these ideals before, but I'm trying, dammit. Getting involved with people who guilt-trip you or have great expectations that mustn't be disappointed is the first problem, there.)
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You are such a sweetheart, Jay, counseling calm and understanding when everyone else is telling me to go into "vengeance is mine, saith the Dawn" mode.
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Hey! I saw what you did there! You're supposed to be my friend, and take my side in everything, no matter how bitchy and petulant I get. *pouts*
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