today is the last day of break. it sucks. i can't believe government can let school go on...all we are doing is studying for AP exams...we aren't learning anything. school is 5 times as pointless as it ever was and now the weather is sooooo nice, school is soooooo close to ending. i know i'm going to start going crazy soon ( Read more... )

i'm ruining my life. i don't know anything anymore. i think i've ruined everything with nelsol. i'm just a big baby that doesn't know anything. i get so upset over anything. tonight i'm gonna go home, think, sleep and maybe think of a way back into nelsol's heart instead of him pushing me away because of everything i do wrong ( Read more... )

AWWW! i want it! except it's a 7.50 shipping charge! what a rip off...


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1.) Yohey's partay is friday! So everyone come over. No i'm serious. ask me at school and i'll give you directions to my house. Everyone's invited (me mums won't be home). So COME AND MEET A COOL JAPANESE DUDE AND HAVE FUN ( Read more... )

[Four beverages you drink frequently ( Read more... )

i need some sedatives. lately, for the past couple of weeks i've been really panicky. usually i'm laid back and don't care. but now i'm a freaking crybaby. i never feel good enough anymore and i feel like i'm always making the wrong decisions. i curse myself and then start thinking of all i do wrong and then i start crying, then i start crying cuz ( Read more... )

the world shifts all the time. i don't mean earth. i mean the perspective and situations and all that shit. it always feels like you have to keep walking funny to get where you want, like the canoe ride circle at cedar point. the person you love only lives less than two miles away and yet you can't go see them at will. you can have your friend ( Read more... )

wow if you haven't been able to tell already...my self image is pretty much shit and saying something to me like "i know you're not going to run because you won't ever do it" does not make me feel good. i have had my complete self esteem torn down 3 times in the past two days. yeah you're right, i don't want to do it because i just feel like ( Read more... )

whew. just ran on the treadmill. i was thisclose to not running on it but then i decided to get my ass up and start losing weight. my goal right now is to get to a fat weight, then a normal one, then bones popping out skinny!!!!! yay. this really helps to get the anger out of me. seriously mr. french got way too personal with me and pissed me off ( Read more... )

so today i was doing the dinner dishes and i was completely repulsed by the smell, feel of rotting food brushing against my hands and total grossness of it all. i was reminded of that stupid song we used to sing in girl scouts: great big globs of greasy grimy gopher guts, mutilated monkey meat, itty bitty birdy feet, french-fried eyeballs swimming ( Read more... )