Comments | szaleniec1000: In This World and the Next Chapter 14

szaleniec1000

In This World and the Next Chapter 14

Jun 25, 2015 00:40

ITWATN has no surprises left, or so I thought. We've had Percy being fed to Fluffy for nothing at all. We've had Ron (but not Ginny, Neville or Luna) being inherently prone to blood supremacy, which justifies a group of nominal adults victimising an eleven-year-old. We've had, of course, a "shit wizard" being somehow able to overpower Hermione ( Read more... )

show don't tell, percy is evil, draco is evil, informed wrongness, expospeak, ron is evil, pov!fail, reading the books is a good idea, fucking self-awareness how does it work, are you a witch or not, badfic:in this world and the next, sentences are not minivans, damning with faint praise, hermione in name only, ineffectual villainy, double standard, anticlimax, epic fail, hollywood law, i still ship percy/penelope, everyone is evil, a description would be nice, conflict be damned, i can has characterisation, ginny is ooc, sexism, you call that pacing, disembodied dialogue, harry potter, muriel is evil, idiot balls for everyone, dumbledore is evil, it's full of filler, approved hogwarts exposed dialogue voice

Comments 125

undying_embers June 29 2015, 02:07:08 UTC

Wasn't this basically Percy's plan with Penelope, except that was meant to have retrospectively justified feeding him to Fluffy?

Now that you mention it, every single couple (except perhaps H/H) in this fic gets together via a plot or a scheme (Tonks/Lupin, Sirius/OC, Millicent/Neville come to mind). Yet we are supposed to think that it is bad when Percy plots to hook up with Penelope or when Mrs. Weasley plots to have Ginny marry Harry.

[Charlie] hated to think of Ginny staying with this vile woman, she wouldn't be the happy, vivacious young girl he saw today if she lived under this roof.

Well, gee. Maybe Ginny wouldn't be in this situation if Lord and Lady Potter didn't force their family into destitution.

szaleniec1000 June 29 2015, 16:25:09 UTC

And even H/H are soulbonded, so basically nobody enters a relationship on their own initiative. Make of that what you will.

sickbritkid2 August 5 2015, 04:33:45 UTC

Hermione's parents are going to become Harry's guardians, you need to be at least sixteen before you can marry there.

I'd point out that the British government would definitely raise an eyebrow to two parents becoming Harry's guardians specifically to legitimize him, an 11 year-old, being married to their 11 year-old daughter...but after the Rotherham incident, I'm not entirely sure.

Boo-doop boop bu-doop boop. Boop!

sickbritkid2 August 5 2015, 04:35:15 UTC

And the most she's been in the story so far. Why are we suddenly in her POV? Why has she suddenly become "Millie" with no explanation?

And why the fuck is Millicent Bulstrode suddenly crushing on Neville when our sole witnessing of her character was her damn-near choking Hermione to death!?

sickbritkid2 August 5 2015, 04:36:32 UTC

She had quickly recognised his almost paralysing shyness for what it was and her determination to coax him out of that shell of his seemed to grow stronger with each passing day. She'd known what Harry and Hermione were doing today, but Millie was resolved to use any tool or technique available to her in her bid to get Neville talking and comfortable in her presence.

We're still in her POV, right? Or is this the narrator? Even so, these are some of the most eloquent thoughts-of-a-12-year-old I've ever seen.

sickbritkid2 August 5 2015, 04:43:17 UTC

Millie's plan was a fairly simple one, become Neville's friend, hopefully girlfriend before the better looking girls came sniffing around and she lost any chance she had.

And now we have a goddamned 11 year-old failing the Bechdel Test.

Thanks, Robst. Thanks for that.