Alright. I havent posted in a million years but here goes. I'm still with the same guy from my previous entries. We have new problems now. He told me hes afraid he will find some one else when he goes off to college. And I freaked out. Like seriously. I'm the one in college and hes still in fuckin high school. Then hes flirting and giving car rides ( Read more... )

Hey. I'm 168 as of 1 hour ago. Today I worked 6 hours. I ate oat meal 160, 4 pieces of toast with butter 350, 2 bowls of cereal with milk 400, 3 chocolate bars (EWWW) 750, lean pocket 260, sweet tea 60, potatoe salad 200, bush beans 100. Those are approx cal calualtions. Thats over 2000 cal. Which is pretty much revolting. I ran off about 200 cal ( Read more... )

It really sucks working in a place that has food everywhere. I'm constantly wanting to eat. Blllaaahhh. God I HATE how my sister is starving for unessesary attention. She is so pathetiiiccc. I like working out but I think every time i work out I gain weight. For the past few weeks ive weight around 162 and i weighed myself a few hours ago and I ( Read more... )

So its earlier that it was last night and im less tired. Still tired though. Anywho my boyfriend came to MY house tonight. We watched that movie called Pleasentville or something like that with Reese Witherspoon.. it was fun i guess. Rather akward at some points but all was good i suppose. My sister is being stupid. So ok a little recap on whats ( Read more... )

 Wow. I havent posted a journal entry in a very long time. Well in the past 6 or so months I've Graduated from high school. And I still worry about my weight and size. But lately i've been more comfortable about being my size since a plus size model won antm in the recent cycle. But I still think her winning wont change the worlds outlook on full ( Read more... )

I havent wrote in a while now. A long while. Well since a while ago I've gotten fat. And I guess I lost 4 or 5 lbs cuz now I weigh 160 in the mornings. Gah. I need to get back on track so badly. And I need to do it now. I have all these clothes that are to small for me that I want to fit into again. We have a volleyball game tomorrow and we are ( Read more... )

So today is the third day of vball prac. I'm about 25 lbs heavier than I was last year at this time. Gross right? Blah blah. I've accepted myself as bisexual last week. Its still hard for me sometimes. My heterosexual side is still extremely domanant. Anywho because im fatter this year vball is harder for me cuz im carrying around those extra nasty ( Read more... )

Well I'm officially depressed again. I was reading bebo comments from my bf and another girl and shes been wanting to hang out with him and ask him questions. The comments were from 5 weeks ago. But still. I cant believe it. And I guess it doesnt really suprise me. She is the same girl that he was trying to decided between her and I. I of course ( Read more... )

So today I woke up and decided not to eat very much cuz I need to stop somewhere. I skipped breakfast and I had to eat lunch with my dad. I ordered a small french fry and a softshell taco. Well it took forever to finally get my taco so they brought me a free chocolate sunday. I was like "shit". I ended up eating it all. Then I drank a frappiccino ( Read more... )

Sorry I havent wrote in awhile ive just been like super busy and such. Anywho I've got time today. I've been eating like everything and gaining like no other. I'm 5'10" and weight 162. GROSS. Today I've stopped eating all that shit. This morning I've had a cup of green tea. Feels good. I couldnt run last night because of a lightening storm. I'm ( Read more... )