I'm sitting in my room right now for what will be the last time in at least 2 months. I was so sure about this decision up until now. I still am sure that I want to go away to college and am sure it will be a great experience. But to say I'm not extremely nervous would be bullshit. I haven't felt this uneasy in a very long time. It finally hit me ( Read more... )

I'm almost positive I'm going away to school now. There's nothing keeping me on Long Island. This place is a shithole and I feel like everyones shedded their convictions for parties and inside jokes. Maybe I need to get away to miss it who knows. I'll probably change my mind by tommorow I've just been in a shitty mood all day because I think I ( Read more... )

 So I am probably going to be interviewing Jeff from Modern Life Is War in April for either Jaycox's or my own zine. Awesome. I also got a date to prom with a really cool girl. I really hope I dont fuck either of them up. It seems like for once something may work out, but I can't help but have doubt in the back of my mind. I really hope for once ( Read more... )

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK. As usual, got my hopes up too soon. Counted the chickens before they hatched. Due to recent knowledge and me being a nice dude when it comes to my friends will forever be the bane of my existance. At least I wont be wasting any money. Still frustrating.

I dont know where the fuck I am or what the fuck is going on lately. Everything goes from great to completley fucked in a matter of minutes, its depressing really. There's been a few things that should really get my spirits up, like getting into every college I've applied to so far. But then there's other things that just bring me right back down. ( Read more... )

 The new year so far isnt too much better then last year. The christmas break was awesome i hung out with a lot of people and went out pretty much every night. Met some cool people too. I met a really, really cute girl. Apparently she was or is into me but she has a boyfriend in jail. Fuck. Whatever I'm not gonna dwell on shit. A lot of shit going ( Read more... )

weekend was fun. Friday saw I am Legend with john christina nick jess and a drunk as fuck po who puked out of johns window then in the theater. Movie was mad good. Saturday city with mikey rob danielle and bj. Met up with Ashley and lucas then bcox later. Went to generation picked up some good shit. Vegan dinner. My parents are taking my car away ( Read more... )

 So i just got done watching home movies and I used to be so happy. What the fuck happened? I was such a happy kid. I wish I could be half as psyched for anything now as I was about life in general back then. What the fuck is wrong with me?

This was a good weekend. Friday, usual party at mikeys. Saturday rob and i went to see chuck ragan at looney tunes. He played awesome and played god deciding by hwm. i made a comment to rob how the girl in front of me was cute. Chuck finishes his set, we look around, i finally pick up the sundowner cd. Talk to chuck, get on line to pay for my cd. ( Read more... )

My misanthropy and downright disdain for this mistake we call mankind grows stronger and stronger every fucking day.