I really don't want to offend anyone and I really don't think you are the audience that needs to hear this, but maybe it's time to spread the word. It really is not appropriate to always respond to what people tell you with a story about yourself. It's what we do, I get it, it's part of talking...but, it's not always the best choice.
I get that
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WHY WOULD SOMEONE SAY THAT???!!! lame...
they probably get nervous, or are trying to make you feel like you're not alone or something, but really just making it awkward instead.
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but now that Dx day is more than four years behind us, I've gotten a lot tougher and when people start saying blah, blah, blah, about what they know about ASDs, I just turn them off so I only hear "blah blah blah" Sometimes I get a mean streak and I tell them of one of my son's more hideous moments - I prefer the god awful melt downs he's had at the grocery store - the ones when the manager comes up to me and asks me if there's anything he can do and I politely say, "naw, he's autistic" and laugh at him when he screws up his face and walks away after a brief pause. that usually gets the stupidheads to shut up about "what they know about ASDs" because really, unless they live with it, they don't have a clue.
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It's interesting - when I squawk about wanting to run people who ask me if I've read Jenny McCarthy's book over with my car, I'M the bad gal. "Don't you think they were just trying to help?" Nope. I think they were trying to "fix" me and/or pigeonhole my daughter. And truthfully? I find both of those things to be pretty insulting.
One of the best, kindest things someone said to me after we got the dx was, "Let me know if there's anything I can do to help." I felt like saying, "Oh, but you already have!"
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Bottom line, we want to think our neighbors, friends, family, and even strangers are on our team, not against it. When they make well-intentioned, but insensitive comments, we quickly realize they are not even on our planet.
I did have one person say that to me. She did give me, the "I know someone line", but at least it was followed up with help. She continues to be someone I trust more than others because of it.
On a different topic, typically my LJ is locked to friends only. I rarely unlock an entry. Let me know if you want to be added. It's good to know people that "get it".
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