Apparently I am working with Girl A now. Near the end of my interview the manager called her over to figure out when she was working, seeming to expect that she would do a lot of my training. She seemed surprised and a bit unsteadied when she came over. I had expected her to be in the other town where she had been living with her boyfriend ( ( Read more... )

A lot has happened but I don't know how to look at it or where to start looking at it. I guess the change happened on August 22nd. Real life had become harder to face as my dreams started to become more and more vivid. But neither was right, the dreams or reality. Both were twisted and I was, quite frankly, tired of being tired. And then I ( Read more... )

I gave myself some sort of burns, I think they may be similar to radiation burns (since they are like a sunburn without the leaking of heat) but I can't be sure. It has happened a couple times before when I used energy but didn't maintain enough defenses to keep from hurting myself in the process. I think the problem is that I am so tired, I ( Read more... )

What measure is a non-human? What is violation of one's person and what is the measure of being violated? Where does control come into the understanding of what is acceptable and what is unacceptable behavior. Black belts in martial arts are not charged with normal "assault" if they punch someone, rather "assault with a deadly weapon"; their ( Read more... )

I might not be on much, or at all, for a while. I can't find a job and don't have enough money for rent at the end of the month so I don't know that I will have a place to live either. I'm sorry I didn't do more. Even so, I got nothing out of most of my efforts anyway. That's the circumstance, nothing more I can say.

A few days ago I had two girls tell me that I was a great guy, in terms of dating and such, and another girl hit on me. And all of that happened in one day. It was nice to hear from the third girl because it shows me that mabie people who don't know me well can see what the other two did. I tend to either make a great first impression, a ( Read more... )

I have been thinking about some things lately. Where I am and where I hoped to be. What I want to do. Why I am not farther toward my goals. Why my goals are not where I want to be. How things have messed up. How little I care about things that should be motivating. How many mistakes I have made in trying to do better. I feel like I am going ( Read more... )

Yesturday was an odd day, though I couldn't put my finger on why so i just ignored it and tried to do what I could. Then I got a call from my x-girlfriend because she felt like she was being attacked. It was fairly obvious that she was right because all the lights on my car suddenly stopped working when I tried to go see if I could help. By the ( Read more... )

Two mornings ago I had a dream that was obviously influenced by outside forces. I did not accept the contents of the dream (it was supposed to be a sex dream) but because I did not outright reject it the thing ended up as that I was asleep in the dream with something like that being the effect of the dream. It ended up having an effect on me when ( Read more... )

So I'm waking up at 4am again. The last three nights in a row and one or two more times during the last week. I looked it up and that is he same time that used to be associated with girl A. I've also been feeling worried about her more, though all I can do is pray and then try to go on with my life. I do still care for her very deeply, but after so ( Read more... )