Where I Stood - Chapter Five: Nemesis [Skins; Naomi/Emily] - Part One
Title: Where I Stood (6/8 - But may change)
Chapter: Nemesis
Pairing: Naomi/Emily, Effy, JJ
Rating: R
Word Count: 10,367
Disclaimer: I don't own the Skins characters, I'm just borrowing them for a little while to play in my own world.
Summary:The regrets you make always come back to haunt you...
Where I Stood - Chapter One: What I Wanted To Say
Where I Stood - Chapter Two: Wait It Out
Where I Stood - Chapter Three: No Longer What You Require (Part One)
Where I Stood - Chapter Three: No Longer What You Require (Part Two)
Where I Stood - Emily's Interlude #1: Nineteen
Where I Stood - Chapter Four: I Saw (Part One)
Where I Stood - Chapter Four: I Saw (Part Two)
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Chapter Five: Nemesis //I am a creeping and intangible sense of loss. I’m the memory you can’t get out your head.\\
Sometimes, Naomi forgets what it’s like to go back to that feeling where everything felt like it was falling down around her. It settles uncomfortably in her stomach, leaves her feeling nauseas, her chest tightening at everything that has taken place over the last few hours; the last few months.
It’s different this time, the way in which watching Emily leaving has her feeling terribly empty. There isn’t doubt there like there once was, niggling away at her with every second that passes and screaming out that she could have done more.
It’s what makes it hurt worse, knowing that this time she gave it her all- did everything she could possibly think to do to prove to Emily that she loved her and that she was here, really here this time and not going anywhere- and still failed.
It leaves a bitter taste of defeat in her mouth, makes Naomi twist away from the ruffled sheets and empty space where Emily’s body had laid tangled with hers only hours earlier.
She doesn’t cry. Not even when she gets a whiff of Emily’s scent still lingering in the air and finds that her eyes sting so much from unshed tears that she has to squeeze them shut tightly just to try stop them from breaking out and slipping down onto her cheeks.
Naomi knows she should move, should get up from the bed and pull herself together, but something inside her won’t let her, stays unmoving instead and lets her hold onto the memory of their night together for as long as possible.
-----
It’s almost dark outside again by the time Naomi finally forces herself out of bed, her head pounding so painfully that it feels like it might split in half even though she hasn’t found it in herself to cry yet; doesn’t know what good that would do anyway.
She slips an old baggy t-shirt over her head before stripping the sheets off of her bed and carrying them straight downstairs, hurriedly putting them in the washing machine; her eyes watching as the water rises and drowns the sheets, washing it all away.
She bypasses the living room completely when even catching the slightest glimmer of all of the empty bottles scattered on the coffee table leaves her feeling like bile is rising up in her throat and threatening to escape.
It’s sharp, whatever it is, piercing into the sole of her foot at the bottom of the stairs and makes Naomi curse aloud. She sees it then, the delicate silver chain, as her eyes fall irritably to the offending item. She reaches down for it carefully and almost comes back up lightheaded when she sees what necklace it actually is.
She runs the chain through her fingers, the little heart locket landing perfectly in her palm as her eyes work over it. The tears spring to her eyes unexpectedly then, and Naomi isn’t sure why something that had seemed so insignificant to her back then, something she’d done to try and quell Emily’s need for her to be romantic, now suddenly seems like so much more. It stills her heart almost completely to think that Emily has cared enough to keep it all these years - remembers the look of shock and happiness on Emily’s face when she’d first given it to her out by their lake with a ridiculously cheesy, “My heart truly belongs to you now, Ems.” and watching as Emily held it up to her own chest like it was possible for their hearts to merge into one - let alone still wear it. Wonders what it means that she’s found it laying broken on the floor only hours after Emily shattered her heart.
Ironic, Naomi thinks cynically, two hearts broken in one day. Wonders whether this one represents Emily’s own or whether it’s just a sign that it’s unwanted now that Emily’s finally given it back.
-----
It doesn’t take long for her skin to start prickling.
Naomi pulls the t-shirt from over her head, dropping it thoughtlessly to the ground as she stands in front of the full length mirror in the bathroom; she feels strangely foreign, looking back at her naked reflection, her eyes analysing every inch of bare skin.
Her skin crawls unpleasantly beneath her gaze, feels like its setting alight and burning when she thinks about every part of her that Emily has touched and kissed, and just like that it feels utterly devastating, how her skin feels like its tightening around her bones, trying desperately not to fit the person she sees looking back at her; those blue, undeserving eyes unwavering the entire time.
It’s the final straw.
Naomi reaches frantically for the shower nozzle, her fingers spinning the dial, turning it to its highest temperature until water tumbles down around her quickly enough that she loses herself in the steam. She hisses as the spray connects with her skin but relishes in the pain it brings, hopes the water can cleanse her of her sins as it leaves behind blotchy red marks while it scorches away the memory of last night, of every trace of Emily.
Only it doesn’t work. The memory still lingers, she sees flashes of Emily weaving in and out of her mind and appearing painfully in front of her eyes, even as she scrubs at her flesh. It’s enough to break her; her body heaving out a loud wracking sob, her body shaking as she sinks down to the ground, and tears finally overwhelming her.
-----
It’s Bricker who sees her first.
Naomi doesn’t hear them returning home or how Bricker bounds up the stairs and waddles straight into the bathroom to use the toilet. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees her, knees drawn up to her chest, her eyes puffy and red from endless crying while the shower still rains heavily down on her.
He blinks rapidly at her for a few moments, his face remaining completely blank as he calls out an impressively loud, “Mummy!” that has Effy hurrying up the stairs in a flash.
“What’s the mat--” Effy’s eyes land on her the moment she steps foot into room, and Naomi shakes her head almost helplessly in response to the wordless question that passes between them, watches as Effy’s eyes go wild with worry. She touches Bricker on the shoulder, and gently escorts him out of the room saying, “It’s okay Bricker. Nae’s just a little upset. Wait downstairs, please.” as she closes the door behind him and turns back to Naomi with a panic-stricken look on her face; momentarily stunned into inaction.
All it takes is Naomi whimpering out a broken, “Eff...” for Effy to kick back into gear, striding swiftly across the room and stepping into the shower with her in one quick movement.
Effy doesn’t worry about the water, now freezing cold, from soaking through her clothing. Just sinks down next to Naomi and pulls her close; holding her in her arms, rocking her gently and cooing soothing words at her until she finally stops trembling.
-----
Effy never asks, and Naomi’s eternally grateful that sometimes she just understands without anything having to be said. When she crawls into bed next to Effy in the early hours of the morning and feels Effy reach for her hand, tangling their fingers together with one gentle squeeze, she knows there’s no need to explain anyway. Effy knows.
-----
She doesn’t contact Emily and Emily doesn’t try to contact her, and Naomi almost laughs brokenly when she realises avoidance is all that either of them have really got left to give.
-----
“Rachel called here,” Effy says matter-of-factly as they watch Bricker play quietly by himself in the garden.
Naomi tenses immediately. “What did she want?”
Effy tears her eyes away from Bricker to look at her. “She’s invited us over for a barbeque on Sunday. Their official housewarming, apparently.”
“Well, great for them then.” Naomi scoffs, before sarcastically adding, “Have a good time.”
Effy studies her for a second before saying, “I think you should come, Nae.”
Naomi forces up a laugh, looks back at Effy with wide eyes. “Why the hell would I want to do that?”
Effy looks away from her and back to Bricker, calls out “Don’t cover your toys in the mud!” before continuing simply, “To see for yourself.”
It’s cryptic as always, and Naomi can’t be bothered to try and work it out for herself. “To see what for myself?”
Effy tips her head back as she glances up at the sun, and Naomi watches the way it casts shadows on her face and hides her expression before Effy looks back at her with a newly revealed, barely present smile, “If she really thinks it was a mistake.”
Naomi doesn’t say anything back as Effy makes her way over to Bricker, just tilts her own head back to look up at the sun and wonders just how much of the truth can really be hidden in the light of day once the shadows disappear.
It only takes a second before she considers going.
-----
JJ looks shy when Naomi opens the door on Sunday morning, raising her eyebrow with a smile as she glances down at the bunch of flowers he’s holding. Teasing him with a, “I’m guessing those aren’t for me?”
He looks down at them, blinking a few times before shaking his head. “Well, no, not exactly. These are hibiscus roses and they mean delicate beauty and, well, I got them for Effy because I think she’s rather beaut--” Naomi can’t help but laugh a little when he stops himself, looking up at her with slight anxiety. “Do you think she’ll like them? I hope she will beca--”
“JJ, they’re lovely. I’m sure she will like them. Now come inside already, would you? Eff’s almost ready.”
He smiles at her a little as she lets him in, his shoulders tense and hunched slightly as he mutters, “Thank you.”
Naomi sets to work helping Bricker with his shoes and it doesn’t take long before Effy comes down the stairs with a shy smile as she catches sight of JJ with the flowers, and Naomi instantly notices the way one smile from her puts JJ at ease. She watches the quiet exchange between them as he hands over the roses, sees the tint of a blush on Effy’s face a second later and can’t help but think how nice it is, seeing something in its early stages where every movement is calculated with care and appreciated tenfold.
Effy catches her eye and cheeky smile and playfully flips her off before pressing a kiss to JJ’s lips and disappearing into the kitchen to put the flowers into some water before they leave.
As they settle into the car and begin their journey to the house, Naomi finds herself thinking about how to approach Emily in the same intentional but cautious way that JJ had given Effy the flowers. Wonders if tentative but honest will be enough for her when it comes down to talking to Emily about what happened between them. Hopes it will be.
-----
She braces herself from the moment Rachel opens the door with a beautiful welcoming smile, says, “Hey, everyone, glad you could make it.” before kissing them each on the cheek and inviting them inside the house she shares with Emily.
Naomi feels guilt set in the moment Rachel’s eyes set on her own, suddenly doesn’t know what she was thinking coming to their house to talk to Emily about how in one moment, they’d fucked this innocent woman over, and how she still doesn’t regret it at all.
Effy senses the shift in her body language and slips Bricker’s hand into hers as she turns back and threads her own through JJ’s. It’s silly almost, how something as simple as having Bricker’s little hand in her own can make her desire to flee almost dwindle away completely as Rachel leads them through the house.
He tugs at her hand a second later and looks up at her with focused eyes that are so Effy, Naomi sometimes feels like he knows all of her secrets too, but then he says, “I need the toilet,” and she rolls her eyes at herself, remembers he’s four, for Christ’s sake.
“Hey, Rachel,” Naomi calls out, seeing as Rachel stops mid conversation with Effy and smiles brightly in her direction. She falters a second under her gaze but eventually manages to point rather stupidly down at Bricker, explaining, “He needs to use the toilet. Do you mind?”
“It’s upstairs, third door on the left. Come join us in the garden when you’re done.” Rachel looks down at Bricker, “Okay, sweetheart?” Naomi feels his grip tighten in her hand as he shuffles in closer to her and takes some mild satisfaction that she might not be the only one who’s not too keen on Emily’s latest choice.
-----
They find the bathroom easily, and it’s only as they make their way back towards the stairs that Naomi’s eyes focus in on the small selection of photographs on the wall. She feels wrong somehow, looking at them, but she can’t stop herself, hates how in each photograph Rachel has her arms wrapped around Emily possessively almost like a silent warning for Naomi to stay away.
“That one was taken last Christmas at her parents’ house.”
Naomi turns quickly towards the voice, feels her heart pounding rapidly in her chest and blushes instinctively at being caught looking. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I just--”
Rachel waves her hand dismissively. “Don’t worry, Naomi. They’re on the wall for a reason.” Naomi’s sure it’s meant to come off lightly, but she can’t help but notice the slight edge to her tone, feels like it’s Rachel’s way of saying “fuck you, she’s mine” and how could Naomi protest when the evidence is right there in front of her eyes.
It only gets more awkward when Bricker babbles, “We have a photograph of Emlee at our house, too.”
Naomi reaches down and ruffles her hand in his hair, forcing a smile onto her face when she looks at Rachel and explains, “From that time Emily helped me babysit and we went to the zoo.”
Rachel’s eyes narrow ever so slightly, but she smiles a moment later, erasing any unease from her face. “Of course. Now, come on, let’s get back to the party. Jay was just starting the grill up when I came to find you.”
Naomi feels a wave of relief and grasps at Bricker’s hand and pulls him to follow, stopping when he resists. “What’s up, Brickster? Don’t you want a burger?”
Bricker looks thoughtful for a moment before saying, “You have a picture of Emlee in your room too, Nae.”
Naomi tenses, and quickly glances over her shoulder, thankful that Rachel’s already disappeared back down the stairs and lets out a shaky breath. Smiles at him before replying, “Yeah, I do. But that’s a secret, okay?”
Bricker smiles back at her before letting out an perceptive, “Okay,” and holding his arms up at her until she swings him up onto her hip.
As she carries him back down to everyone, Naomi can’t help but think that maybe she was wrong, maybe all of the Stonem’s do know her secrets.
-----
Emily looks more than a little shocked when she arrives an hour later; her body freezing the moment her eyes connect with Naomi’s own, and the colour instantly drains from her face as if she can’t quite believe that Naomi is really sitting there in front of her.
Rachel rushes over to her with a cheery, “Surprise!” that doesn’t seem to take away any of the tension in Emily’s body, says, “Everyone’s here for our housewarming, babe. Don’t look so shocked to see your friends.” And Naomi sees the way Emily’s lips twist up into an uncomfortable smile as Rachel presses a kiss to her cheek and drags her over to join them at the table.
It makes Naomi’s stomach churn, watching as Rachel’s hand slips easily into Emily’s as they make their way over to them, hurts her more than she expected to see someone other than her getting touch Emily in these simple ways.
Emily actively avoids looking at her when she greets everyone, and accepts JJ’s offer of a burger with a stiff nod of her head, still standing rather awkwardly away from everyone.
“Sit down darling,” Rachel urges from her own seat, pointing her finger at the remaining empty seat, and turning back to engage Effy in conversation.
It must be karma of some sort, Naomi thinks, that Emily has to sit down next to her, looking more hesitant than Naomi can ever remember seeing her. Feels a little like the world is finally giving her a break, a chance to say what she’s come here to say and finally get the answers to all of the questions that have been invading her head since the moment Emily kissed her back.
Emily reaches her arm out to grab the bottle of wine, and Naomi feels her own hand instinctively reaching out to cover Emily’s thigh. She doesn’t know why she does it, just knows that she can’t help the urge she has within her to reach out and try to calm Emily, to remind her that it’s just her, and that it’s just them.
Only it’s not just them, and when Emily lets out a shaky gasp at the contact and drops the wine bottle, it’s all Naomi can do to watch the glass shatter into thousands of pieces while the rich, red liquid sprays up at Emily’s body as she jumps back from Naomi’s touch.
“Fuck’s sake!” Emily curses, her eyes wide and disbelieving. “Sorry, I just--” She shoots Naomi a look before quickly recovering. “It slipped out of my hand.”
“Darling, why don’t you go and get some more wine and I’ll clean this up, okay?” Emily nods her head at Rachel and hurries away from the table, back up the garden and retreats into the house without looking back at her.
Naomi catches Effy’s eye, sees the warning look there but finds herself ignoring it when she says, “Why don’t I go and get a cloth so we can wipe this mess up?”
Rachel smiles at her so genuinely that it makes Naomi feel sick with guilt at what she’s about to do. “Thanks, Naomi. That’d be a great help.”
She excuses herself from the table and hurries up to the house behind Emily, takes a deep breath to steady herself and hopes the conversation they’re about to have goes smoother than the disaster they just created outside.
-----
Naomi lingers in the doorway, watching as Emily steadies herself against the kitchen sink, her head bowed as she takes in deep breaths.
She stays silent for a long time, doesn’t want to unnerve Emily anymore than possible and so grants her a few moments to herself before she finally says, “It wasn’t a mistake... what happened between us the other ni--”
Emily flinches at her words, turns to look at her in a way that’s part warning and part pleading when she says, “Don’t, Naomi.”
“Ems--”
“What are you even doing here?” Emily asks, the words coming out choked as she averts Naomi’s unrelenting gaze. “Are you trying to hurt me?”
Naomi feels her chest clench painfully and shakes her head in disbelief. “No. Of course I’m not here to-- I never want to hurt you ever again, Em.” She takes a few steps into the kitchen, and stares at Emily until she looks back. “But it wasn’t a mistake, Emily, and I know you feel the same way.”
Emily looks away as tears form in her eyes, her voice firm when she says, “What happened that night can never happen again, Naomi. It was unbelievably wrong, what we did-- what I did.” She pierces Naomi with a cold look. “I’m with Rachel.”
Naomi sucks in a shaky breath, tries to dispel the aching she can feel settling into her body, whispers, “It might not have been the right circumstances, Em, but that doesn’t make it a mistake.” She sees the tears breaking free from Emily’s eyes and watches as she turns away from her again.
“Please, just leave me alone, Naomi. Don’t do this.”
She hears Emily sniffle and closes the gap between them, standing closely behind Emily but never touching her, and feels her pulse quickening as she prepares herself to ask the one question she fears the most; the one Naomi knows can break her resolve in an instant.
“I know this is hard, and I promise you I’ll never ask you this again, but--” Naomi feels her eyes welling up as the words lodge in her throat. Her voice emerging hoarse and quiet when she continues, “But I just need to know-- I need for you to tell me...” Naomi trails off as Emily slowly turns round to meet her gaze, the pain on Emily’s face mirroring her own, and her voice breaking when she asks, “Do you love her?”
Naomi feels her heart slowing as a deafening silence erupts around them; her ears ringing loudly as her hands begin to shake uncontrollably. She sees Emily’s eyes slip closed, as if the whole thing is just too unbearable for her to witness.
It feels like an eternity before Emily reopens them and looks back at her sorrowfully, her voice almost inaudible when she responds, “Yes, I love her.”
Emily’s words hit her hard, leave her feeling like her chest has constricted so tightly that all the air has been painfully squeezed from her lungs. Naomi lets out choked breath and tears her gaze away from Emily’s, biting hard at her lip to keep herself from crying. It’s excruciating, the way that hearing those words fall from Emily’s lips leaves her heart shattering; the aching so bad she feels physically faint.
Naomi forces herself to look back up at Emily, unashamed of the tears that have managed to break free from her eyes, and offers her a regretful smile. “I just--” She takes a deep breath to try and compose herself before continuing; “I just needed to hear you say it.”
The look on Emily’s face in unreadable, the only obvious sign of distress that Naomi can notice is her eyes, wide, and glassy, are glimmering with hurt and disbelief. It only makes the blow of her words sting more, and so Naomi offers one last tentative half smile before turning on her heel and heading out of the room.
“Nae, wait.”
Naomi stops dead, and closes her eyes shut at the sound of Emily’s voice, broken and desperate, but it isn’t enough to make her turn back around, knows she can’t bear to see the look of sympathetic remorse that she’s sure will be covering Emily’s face; doesn’t want to be pitied by her.
It’s only when she feels Emily step closer to her, and can feel the heat radiating from her body, that she slowly turns back to face her, lifting her eyes up to meet Emily’s own. Naomi sees it then, that same look of adoration that had been there in Emily’s eyes for her the night they shared together.
“I love her,” Emily repeats, her voice trembling as steps closer to Naomi and letting out a heavy breath before she struggles to add, “But, not like I love you.”
Naomi feels lightheaded; it’s too much, all far too much, hearing those three words she’s been aching to hear Emily say to her again after all this time that all she can think to do is close the remaining distance between them, her hand going up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind Emily’s ear as she nuzzles their cheeks together.
She feels Emily shudder at the contact, her own hand going up to Naomi’s cheek as she brings their foreheads to rest against each other, and lets out a shaky breath against Naomi’s lips. It feels so good, having Emily this close that Naomi’s body burns with the desire to kiss her; finds herself automatically leaning in to close that last remaining space between them only to be halted by Emily’s hand pushing at her shoulder while whispering, “I still can’t.”
Naomi takes a step back, finding Emily’s eyes and searching them thoroughly for an explanation. “Em--”
Emily shakes her head wretchedly. “It’s not enough, Naomi.”
“Hey, what’s taking you guys so long?” Rachel’s voice sounds through the room and cuts through Naomi’s attempt to reply, can feel Rachel’s eyes burning into her back when she says, “Is everything okay?”
Naomi can see Emily’s smile is forced when looks over her shoulder and at Rachel. “Everything’s fine, babe.” Emily grabs two bottles of wine off of the side, avoiding meeting Naomi’s eyes as she passes by her to Rachel. “Let’s go join everyone, yeah?”
“Sure.”
Naomi turns just in time to see Rachel’s hand immediately settling at the base of Emily’s back, and feels more tears escaping freely from her eyes, doesn’t understand how she can love someone and have that still not be enough.
Feels her heart breaking all over again.
-----
Effy and Bricker come to find her in the kitchen a moment later, and Effy takes one brief look at her before passing Bricker over to her and returning quickly to the garden to explain to Rachel that Bricker’s feeling unwell and they’re going to have to regretfully head home.
Naomi doesn’t bother to listen to Rachel’s response, just lifts Bricker into her arms and heads straight towards the front door, listening as Effy’s footsteps follow closely behind.
It’s only when they get out of the house for good that Naomi finally feels like she can breathe again.
Wonders what it means that she’s still suffocating after all these years.
-----
She calls in sick to work on Monday.
Doesn’t know how she’s supposed to face Emily now that she’s lost, now that Emily’s chosen someone who isn’t her.
-----
It comes as a surprise late on Tuesday afternoon when Naomi opens the door to find a rather anxious looking JJ. She eyes him carefully for a second before saying cautiously, “Effy’s not here. She had to take Bricker to the doctor’s for a check up.”
JJ nods his head knowingly and looks away from her briefly. “Actually, I’ve come here to see you, Naomi.”
Naomi watches as the muscles in his neck twitch, knows he must be trying to swallow the dryness down in his mouth; his nerves evident as a line of sweat appears on his forehead. She lets out a shallow breath and steps to the side, holding the door open for him and gestures for him to come inside.
He looks down at her with a frown when he notices she’s wearing a ridiculously baggy jumper and old sweat pants, but forces any comment he has about them down as he follows her tentatively into the kitchen.
She hands him a glass of mango juice without a word and settles down in the seat opposite him, stating silent as he downs the liquid in several large mouthfuls. JJ sets the glass back down on the table and blinks rapidly as his eyes settle on hers. Naomi sees it then, the look of guilt that’s evident in his eyes, remembers the way they’d looked exactly like this all those years ago, wide eyed and panic stricken as he tried to apologise for sleeping with Emily.
Suddenly she knows why he’s here, can feel her chest constricting at the mere thought of the conversation that must have taken place and barely manages to get out, “Emily’s told you.”
She watches as JJ’s eyes narrow slightly, her words spoken as a statement and not as a question catching him a little off guard. “Yes, she did. And, well, now I’m here and it’s not really something I want to be doing. But, Emily asked, and she’s my friend, and so--”
“Cut the crap and just tell me why you’re here, JJ?” Naomi cuts him off, her tone direct and flat.
JJ swallows loudly and nods his head, more to himself than to Naomi, says, “Emily asked me to relay a message to you.”
Naomi ignores the way his words make her heart ache, and fights back the tears in her eyes. “And what might that message be?”
He looks away from her when he replies, “She wants you to stay away from her.” He glances up at her with a worried expression as if he fears she’ll erupt with rage, and only when she doesn’t react does he look back at her a little more confidently while continuing, “Obviously Emily is aware that as co-workers you’ll have to see each other on a daily basis, but she’d prefer if you didn’t try to communicate with her in any way unless it has to do with work. She thinks it’s best that you give each other some space considering recent events.”
Naomi chuckles bitterly. “Oh, I’m sure she does.” She runs her hand carelessly through her hair and asks, “Am I allowed to reply to this message of hers, then?”
JJ looks momentarily bewildered until he catches on to what she’s saying, stutters, “Erm, well, she didn’t say that you couldn’t. So I guess it would be okay for me to relay a message back to her for you. What should I tell her?”
Naomi purses her lips together, tries not to let herself get upset over Emily’s request, always knew Emily would chose to do the honourable thing in the end despite how they feel about each other. She lets out a shaky breath before saying sadly, “You can tell Emily that her wish is my command.”
“You’ll leave her alone?” JJ asks carefully, wanting to reaffirm that he’s gotten this right.
“Yes, Jay. I’ll leave her alone.”
JJ nods his head silently and stands from the chair, stares at her for a long moment with a sorrowful frown and says, “I’m sorry, Naomi.”
Naomi catches the sincerity in his voice and offers him a half-smile. “No need for you to apologise. None of this is your fault, JJ.”
“Yes, well, quite... but I am sorry things aren’t different.” He says quietly before heading out of the room.
“Jay.” Naomi calls after him, catching him just as he gets to the front door. Wipes swiftly at her eyes when a couple of tears leak down her cheeks when she says, “Tell her I’m sorry, too. Okay?” He nods his head just once, before opening the door and letting himself out without another word. Naomi can’t help but think that his silence says more than anything else ever could.
-----
Where I Stood - Chapter Five: Nemesis (Part Two)
Chapter: Nemesis
Pairing: Naomi/Emily, Effy, JJ
Rating: R
Word Count: 10,367
Disclaimer: I don't own the Skins characters, I'm just borrowing them for a little while to play in my own world.
Summary:The regrets you make always come back to haunt you...
Where I Stood - Chapter One: What I Wanted To Say
Where I Stood - Chapter Two: Wait It Out
Where I Stood - Chapter Three: No Longer What You Require (Part One)
Where I Stood - Chapter Three: No Longer What You Require (Part Two)
Where I Stood - Emily's Interlude #1: Nineteen
Where I Stood - Chapter Four: I Saw (Part One)
Where I Stood - Chapter Four: I Saw (Part Two)
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Chapter Five: Nemesis //I am a creeping and intangible sense of loss. I’m the memory you can’t get out your head.\\
Sometimes, Naomi forgets what it’s like to go back to that feeling where everything felt like it was falling down around her. It settles uncomfortably in her stomach, leaves her feeling nauseas, her chest tightening at everything that has taken place over the last few hours; the last few months.
It’s different this time, the way in which watching Emily leaving has her feeling terribly empty. There isn’t doubt there like there once was, niggling away at her with every second that passes and screaming out that she could have done more.
It’s what makes it hurt worse, knowing that this time she gave it her all- did everything she could possibly think to do to prove to Emily that she loved her and that she was here, really here this time and not going anywhere- and still failed.
It leaves a bitter taste of defeat in her mouth, makes Naomi twist away from the ruffled sheets and empty space where Emily’s body had laid tangled with hers only hours earlier.
She doesn’t cry. Not even when she gets a whiff of Emily’s scent still lingering in the air and finds that her eyes sting so much from unshed tears that she has to squeeze them shut tightly just to try stop them from breaking out and slipping down onto her cheeks.
Naomi knows she should move, should get up from the bed and pull herself together, but something inside her won’t let her, stays unmoving instead and lets her hold onto the memory of their night together for as long as possible.
-----
It’s almost dark outside again by the time Naomi finally forces herself out of bed, her head pounding so painfully that it feels like it might split in half even though she hasn’t found it in herself to cry yet; doesn’t know what good that would do anyway.
She slips an old baggy t-shirt over her head before stripping the sheets off of her bed and carrying them straight downstairs, hurriedly putting them in the washing machine; her eyes watching as the water rises and drowns the sheets, washing it all away.
She bypasses the living room completely when even catching the slightest glimmer of all of the empty bottles scattered on the coffee table leaves her feeling like bile is rising up in her throat and threatening to escape.
It’s sharp, whatever it is, piercing into the sole of her foot at the bottom of the stairs and makes Naomi curse aloud. She sees it then, the delicate silver chain, as her eyes fall irritably to the offending item. She reaches down for it carefully and almost comes back up lightheaded when she sees what necklace it actually is.
She runs the chain through her fingers, the little heart locket landing perfectly in her palm as her eyes work over it. The tears spring to her eyes unexpectedly then, and Naomi isn’t sure why something that had seemed so insignificant to her back then, something she’d done to try and quell Emily’s need for her to be romantic, now suddenly seems like so much more. It stills her heart almost completely to think that Emily has cared enough to keep it all these years - remembers the look of shock and happiness on Emily’s face when she’d first given it to her out by their lake with a ridiculously cheesy, “My heart truly belongs to you now, Ems.” and watching as Emily held it up to her own chest like it was possible for their hearts to merge into one - let alone still wear it. Wonders what it means that she’s found it laying broken on the floor only hours after Emily shattered her heart.
Ironic, Naomi thinks cynically, two hearts broken in one day. Wonders whether this one represents Emily’s own or whether it’s just a sign that it’s unwanted now that Emily’s finally given it back.
-----
It doesn’t take long for her skin to start prickling.
Naomi pulls the t-shirt from over her head, dropping it thoughtlessly to the ground as she stands in front of the full length mirror in the bathroom; she feels strangely foreign, looking back at her naked reflection, her eyes analysing every inch of bare skin.
Her skin crawls unpleasantly beneath her gaze, feels like its setting alight and burning when she thinks about every part of her that Emily has touched and kissed, and just like that it feels utterly devastating, how her skin feels like its tightening around her bones, trying desperately not to fit the person she sees looking back at her; those blue, undeserving eyes unwavering the entire time.
It’s the final straw.
Naomi reaches frantically for the shower nozzle, her fingers spinning the dial, turning it to its highest temperature until water tumbles down around her quickly enough that she loses herself in the steam. She hisses as the spray connects with her skin but relishes in the pain it brings, hopes the water can cleanse her of her sins as it leaves behind blotchy red marks while it scorches away the memory of last night, of every trace of Emily.
Only it doesn’t work. The memory still lingers, she sees flashes of Emily weaving in and out of her mind and appearing painfully in front of her eyes, even as she scrubs at her flesh. It’s enough to break her; her body heaving out a loud wracking sob, her body shaking as she sinks down to the ground, and tears finally overwhelming her.
-----
It’s Bricker who sees her first.
Naomi doesn’t hear them returning home or how Bricker bounds up the stairs and waddles straight into the bathroom to use the toilet. He stops dead in his tracks when he sees her, knees drawn up to her chest, her eyes puffy and red from endless crying while the shower still rains heavily down on her.
He blinks rapidly at her for a few moments, his face remaining completely blank as he calls out an impressively loud, “Mummy!” that has Effy hurrying up the stairs in a flash.
“What’s the mat--” Effy’s eyes land on her the moment she steps foot into room, and Naomi shakes her head almost helplessly in response to the wordless question that passes between them, watches as Effy’s eyes go wild with worry. She touches Bricker on the shoulder, and gently escorts him out of the room saying, “It’s okay Bricker. Nae’s just a little upset. Wait downstairs, please.” as she closes the door behind him and turns back to Naomi with a panic-stricken look on her face; momentarily stunned into inaction.
All it takes is Naomi whimpering out a broken, “Eff...” for Effy to kick back into gear, striding swiftly across the room and stepping into the shower with her in one quick movement.
Effy doesn’t worry about the water, now freezing cold, from soaking through her clothing. Just sinks down next to Naomi and pulls her close; holding her in her arms, rocking her gently and cooing soothing words at her until she finally stops trembling.
-----
Effy never asks, and Naomi’s eternally grateful that sometimes she just understands without anything having to be said. When she crawls into bed next to Effy in the early hours of the morning and feels Effy reach for her hand, tangling their fingers together with one gentle squeeze, she knows there’s no need to explain anyway. Effy knows.
-----
She doesn’t contact Emily and Emily doesn’t try to contact her, and Naomi almost laughs brokenly when she realises avoidance is all that either of them have really got left to give.
-----
“Rachel called here,” Effy says matter-of-factly as they watch Bricker play quietly by himself in the garden.
Naomi tenses immediately. “What did she want?”
Effy tears her eyes away from Bricker to look at her. “She’s invited us over for a barbeque on Sunday. Their official housewarming, apparently.”
“Well, great for them then.” Naomi scoffs, before sarcastically adding, “Have a good time.”
Effy studies her for a second before saying, “I think you should come, Nae.”
Naomi forces up a laugh, looks back at Effy with wide eyes. “Why the hell would I want to do that?”
Effy looks away from her and back to Bricker, calls out “Don’t cover your toys in the mud!” before continuing simply, “To see for yourself.”
It’s cryptic as always, and Naomi can’t be bothered to try and work it out for herself. “To see what for myself?”
Effy tips her head back as she glances up at the sun, and Naomi watches the way it casts shadows on her face and hides her expression before Effy looks back at her with a newly revealed, barely present smile, “If she really thinks it was a mistake.”
Naomi doesn’t say anything back as Effy makes her way over to Bricker, just tilts her own head back to look up at the sun and wonders just how much of the truth can really be hidden in the light of day once the shadows disappear.
It only takes a second before she considers going.
-----
JJ looks shy when Naomi opens the door on Sunday morning, raising her eyebrow with a smile as she glances down at the bunch of flowers he’s holding. Teasing him with a, “I’m guessing those aren’t for me?”
He looks down at them, blinking a few times before shaking his head. “Well, no, not exactly. These are hibiscus roses and they mean delicate beauty and, well, I got them for Effy because I think she’s rather beaut--” Naomi can’t help but laugh a little when he stops himself, looking up at her with slight anxiety. “Do you think she’ll like them? I hope she will beca--”
“JJ, they’re lovely. I’m sure she will like them. Now come inside already, would you? Eff’s almost ready.”
He smiles at her a little as she lets him in, his shoulders tense and hunched slightly as he mutters, “Thank you.”
Naomi sets to work helping Bricker with his shoes and it doesn’t take long before Effy comes down the stairs with a shy smile as she catches sight of JJ with the flowers, and Naomi instantly notices the way one smile from her puts JJ at ease. She watches the quiet exchange between them as he hands over the roses, sees the tint of a blush on Effy’s face a second later and can’t help but think how nice it is, seeing something in its early stages where every movement is calculated with care and appreciated tenfold.
Effy catches her eye and cheeky smile and playfully flips her off before pressing a kiss to JJ’s lips and disappearing into the kitchen to put the flowers into some water before they leave.
As they settle into the car and begin their journey to the house, Naomi finds herself thinking about how to approach Emily in the same intentional but cautious way that JJ had given Effy the flowers. Wonders if tentative but honest will be enough for her when it comes down to talking to Emily about what happened between them. Hopes it will be.
-----
She braces herself from the moment Rachel opens the door with a beautiful welcoming smile, says, “Hey, everyone, glad you could make it.” before kissing them each on the cheek and inviting them inside the house she shares with Emily.
Naomi feels guilt set in the moment Rachel’s eyes set on her own, suddenly doesn’t know what she was thinking coming to their house to talk to Emily about how in one moment, they’d fucked this innocent woman over, and how she still doesn’t regret it at all.
Effy senses the shift in her body language and slips Bricker’s hand into hers as she turns back and threads her own through JJ’s. It’s silly almost, how something as simple as having Bricker’s little hand in her own can make her desire to flee almost dwindle away completely as Rachel leads them through the house.
He tugs at her hand a second later and looks up at her with focused eyes that are so Effy, Naomi sometimes feels like he knows all of her secrets too, but then he says, “I need the toilet,” and she rolls her eyes at herself, remembers he’s four, for Christ’s sake.
“Hey, Rachel,” Naomi calls out, seeing as Rachel stops mid conversation with Effy and smiles brightly in her direction. She falters a second under her gaze but eventually manages to point rather stupidly down at Bricker, explaining, “He needs to use the toilet. Do you mind?”
“It’s upstairs, third door on the left. Come join us in the garden when you’re done.” Rachel looks down at Bricker, “Okay, sweetheart?” Naomi feels his grip tighten in her hand as he shuffles in closer to her and takes some mild satisfaction that she might not be the only one who’s not too keen on Emily’s latest choice.
-----
They find the bathroom easily, and it’s only as they make their way back towards the stairs that Naomi’s eyes focus in on the small selection of photographs on the wall. She feels wrong somehow, looking at them, but she can’t stop herself, hates how in each photograph Rachel has her arms wrapped around Emily possessively almost like a silent warning for Naomi to stay away.
“That one was taken last Christmas at her parents’ house.”
Naomi turns quickly towards the voice, feels her heart pounding rapidly in her chest and blushes instinctively at being caught looking. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. I just--”
Rachel waves her hand dismissively. “Don’t worry, Naomi. They’re on the wall for a reason.” Naomi’s sure it’s meant to come off lightly, but she can’t help but notice the slight edge to her tone, feels like it’s Rachel’s way of saying “fuck you, she’s mine” and how could Naomi protest when the evidence is right there in front of her eyes.
It only gets more awkward when Bricker babbles, “We have a photograph of Emlee at our house, too.”
Naomi reaches down and ruffles her hand in his hair, forcing a smile onto her face when she looks at Rachel and explains, “From that time Emily helped me babysit and we went to the zoo.”
Rachel’s eyes narrow ever so slightly, but she smiles a moment later, erasing any unease from her face. “Of course. Now, come on, let’s get back to the party. Jay was just starting the grill up when I came to find you.”
Naomi feels a wave of relief and grasps at Bricker’s hand and pulls him to follow, stopping when he resists. “What’s up, Brickster? Don’t you want a burger?”
Bricker looks thoughtful for a moment before saying, “You have a picture of Emlee in your room too, Nae.”
Naomi tenses, and quickly glances over her shoulder, thankful that Rachel’s already disappeared back down the stairs and lets out a shaky breath. Smiles at him before replying, “Yeah, I do. But that’s a secret, okay?”
Bricker smiles back at her before letting out an perceptive, “Okay,” and holding his arms up at her until she swings him up onto her hip.
As she carries him back down to everyone, Naomi can’t help but think that maybe she was wrong, maybe all of the Stonem’s do know her secrets.
-----
Emily looks more than a little shocked when she arrives an hour later; her body freezing the moment her eyes connect with Naomi’s own, and the colour instantly drains from her face as if she can’t quite believe that Naomi is really sitting there in front of her.
Rachel rushes over to her with a cheery, “Surprise!” that doesn’t seem to take away any of the tension in Emily’s body, says, “Everyone’s here for our housewarming, babe. Don’t look so shocked to see your friends.” And Naomi sees the way Emily’s lips twist up into an uncomfortable smile as Rachel presses a kiss to her cheek and drags her over to join them at the table.
It makes Naomi’s stomach churn, watching as Rachel’s hand slips easily into Emily’s as they make their way over to them, hurts her more than she expected to see someone other than her getting touch Emily in these simple ways.
Emily actively avoids looking at her when she greets everyone, and accepts JJ’s offer of a burger with a stiff nod of her head, still standing rather awkwardly away from everyone.
“Sit down darling,” Rachel urges from her own seat, pointing her finger at the remaining empty seat, and turning back to engage Effy in conversation.
It must be karma of some sort, Naomi thinks, that Emily has to sit down next to her, looking more hesitant than Naomi can ever remember seeing her. Feels a little like the world is finally giving her a break, a chance to say what she’s come here to say and finally get the answers to all of the questions that have been invading her head since the moment Emily kissed her back.
Emily reaches her arm out to grab the bottle of wine, and Naomi feels her own hand instinctively reaching out to cover Emily’s thigh. She doesn’t know why she does it, just knows that she can’t help the urge she has within her to reach out and try to calm Emily, to remind her that it’s just her, and that it’s just them.
Only it’s not just them, and when Emily lets out a shaky gasp at the contact and drops the wine bottle, it’s all Naomi can do to watch the glass shatter into thousands of pieces while the rich, red liquid sprays up at Emily’s body as she jumps back from Naomi’s touch.
“Fuck’s sake!” Emily curses, her eyes wide and disbelieving. “Sorry, I just--” She shoots Naomi a look before quickly recovering. “It slipped out of my hand.”
“Darling, why don’t you go and get some more wine and I’ll clean this up, okay?” Emily nods her head at Rachel and hurries away from the table, back up the garden and retreats into the house without looking back at her.
Naomi catches Effy’s eye, sees the warning look there but finds herself ignoring it when she says, “Why don’t I go and get a cloth so we can wipe this mess up?”
Rachel smiles at her so genuinely that it makes Naomi feel sick with guilt at what she’s about to do. “Thanks, Naomi. That’d be a great help.”
She excuses herself from the table and hurries up to the house behind Emily, takes a deep breath to steady herself and hopes the conversation they’re about to have goes smoother than the disaster they just created outside.
-----
Naomi lingers in the doorway, watching as Emily steadies herself against the kitchen sink, her head bowed as she takes in deep breaths.
She stays silent for a long time, doesn’t want to unnerve Emily anymore than possible and so grants her a few moments to herself before she finally says, “It wasn’t a mistake... what happened between us the other ni--”
Emily flinches at her words, turns to look at her in a way that’s part warning and part pleading when she says, “Don’t, Naomi.”
“Ems--”
“What are you even doing here?” Emily asks, the words coming out choked as she averts Naomi’s unrelenting gaze. “Are you trying to hurt me?”
Naomi feels her chest clench painfully and shakes her head in disbelief. “No. Of course I’m not here to-- I never want to hurt you ever again, Em.” She takes a few steps into the kitchen, and stares at Emily until she looks back. “But it wasn’t a mistake, Emily, and I know you feel the same way.”
Emily looks away as tears form in her eyes, her voice firm when she says, “What happened that night can never happen again, Naomi. It was unbelievably wrong, what we did-- what I did.” She pierces Naomi with a cold look. “I’m with Rachel.”
Naomi sucks in a shaky breath, tries to dispel the aching she can feel settling into her body, whispers, “It might not have been the right circumstances, Em, but that doesn’t make it a mistake.” She sees the tears breaking free from Emily’s eyes and watches as she turns away from her again.
“Please, just leave me alone, Naomi. Don’t do this.”
She hears Emily sniffle and closes the gap between them, standing closely behind Emily but never touching her, and feels her pulse quickening as she prepares herself to ask the one question she fears the most; the one Naomi knows can break her resolve in an instant.
“I know this is hard, and I promise you I’ll never ask you this again, but--” Naomi feels her eyes welling up as the words lodge in her throat. Her voice emerging hoarse and quiet when she continues, “But I just need to know-- I need for you to tell me...” Naomi trails off as Emily slowly turns round to meet her gaze, the pain on Emily’s face mirroring her own, and her voice breaking when she asks, “Do you love her?”
Naomi feels her heart slowing as a deafening silence erupts around them; her ears ringing loudly as her hands begin to shake uncontrollably. She sees Emily’s eyes slip closed, as if the whole thing is just too unbearable for her to witness.
It feels like an eternity before Emily reopens them and looks back at her sorrowfully, her voice almost inaudible when she responds, “Yes, I love her.”
Emily’s words hit her hard, leave her feeling like her chest has constricted so tightly that all the air has been painfully squeezed from her lungs. Naomi lets out choked breath and tears her gaze away from Emily’s, biting hard at her lip to keep herself from crying. It’s excruciating, the way that hearing those words fall from Emily’s lips leaves her heart shattering; the aching so bad she feels physically faint.
Naomi forces herself to look back up at Emily, unashamed of the tears that have managed to break free from her eyes, and offers her a regretful smile. “I just--” She takes a deep breath to try and compose herself before continuing; “I just needed to hear you say it.”
The look on Emily’s face in unreadable, the only obvious sign of distress that Naomi can notice is her eyes, wide, and glassy, are glimmering with hurt and disbelief. It only makes the blow of her words sting more, and so Naomi offers one last tentative half smile before turning on her heel and heading out of the room.
“Nae, wait.”
Naomi stops dead, and closes her eyes shut at the sound of Emily’s voice, broken and desperate, but it isn’t enough to make her turn back around, knows she can’t bear to see the look of sympathetic remorse that she’s sure will be covering Emily’s face; doesn’t want to be pitied by her.
It’s only when she feels Emily step closer to her, and can feel the heat radiating from her body, that she slowly turns back to face her, lifting her eyes up to meet Emily’s own. Naomi sees it then, that same look of adoration that had been there in Emily’s eyes for her the night they shared together.
“I love her,” Emily repeats, her voice trembling as steps closer to Naomi and letting out a heavy breath before she struggles to add, “But, not like I love you.”
Naomi feels lightheaded; it’s too much, all far too much, hearing those three words she’s been aching to hear Emily say to her again after all this time that all she can think to do is close the remaining distance between them, her hand going up to tuck a stray piece of hair behind Emily’s ear as she nuzzles their cheeks together.
She feels Emily shudder at the contact, her own hand going up to Naomi’s cheek as she brings their foreheads to rest against each other, and lets out a shaky breath against Naomi’s lips. It feels so good, having Emily this close that Naomi’s body burns with the desire to kiss her; finds herself automatically leaning in to close that last remaining space between them only to be halted by Emily’s hand pushing at her shoulder while whispering, “I still can’t.”
Naomi takes a step back, finding Emily’s eyes and searching them thoroughly for an explanation. “Em--”
Emily shakes her head wretchedly. “It’s not enough, Naomi.”
“Hey, what’s taking you guys so long?” Rachel’s voice sounds through the room and cuts through Naomi’s attempt to reply, can feel Rachel’s eyes burning into her back when she says, “Is everything okay?”
Naomi can see Emily’s smile is forced when looks over her shoulder and at Rachel. “Everything’s fine, babe.” Emily grabs two bottles of wine off of the side, avoiding meeting Naomi’s eyes as she passes by her to Rachel. “Let’s go join everyone, yeah?”
“Sure.”
Naomi turns just in time to see Rachel’s hand immediately settling at the base of Emily’s back, and feels more tears escaping freely from her eyes, doesn’t understand how she can love someone and have that still not be enough.
Feels her heart breaking all over again.
-----
Effy and Bricker come to find her in the kitchen a moment later, and Effy takes one brief look at her before passing Bricker over to her and returning quickly to the garden to explain to Rachel that Bricker’s feeling unwell and they’re going to have to regretfully head home.
Naomi doesn’t bother to listen to Rachel’s response, just lifts Bricker into her arms and heads straight towards the front door, listening as Effy’s footsteps follow closely behind.
It’s only when they get out of the house for good that Naomi finally feels like she can breathe again.
Wonders what it means that she’s still suffocating after all these years.
-----
She calls in sick to work on Monday.
Doesn’t know how she’s supposed to face Emily now that she’s lost, now that Emily’s chosen someone who isn’t her.
-----
It comes as a surprise late on Tuesday afternoon when Naomi opens the door to find a rather anxious looking JJ. She eyes him carefully for a second before saying cautiously, “Effy’s not here. She had to take Bricker to the doctor’s for a check up.”
JJ nods his head knowingly and looks away from her briefly. “Actually, I’ve come here to see you, Naomi.”
Naomi watches as the muscles in his neck twitch, knows he must be trying to swallow the dryness down in his mouth; his nerves evident as a line of sweat appears on his forehead. She lets out a shallow breath and steps to the side, holding the door open for him and gestures for him to come inside.
He looks down at her with a frown when he notices she’s wearing a ridiculously baggy jumper and old sweat pants, but forces any comment he has about them down as he follows her tentatively into the kitchen.
She hands him a glass of mango juice without a word and settles down in the seat opposite him, stating silent as he downs the liquid in several large mouthfuls. JJ sets the glass back down on the table and blinks rapidly as his eyes settle on hers. Naomi sees it then, the look of guilt that’s evident in his eyes, remembers the way they’d looked exactly like this all those years ago, wide eyed and panic stricken as he tried to apologise for sleeping with Emily.
Suddenly she knows why he’s here, can feel her chest constricting at the mere thought of the conversation that must have taken place and barely manages to get out, “Emily’s told you.”
She watches as JJ’s eyes narrow slightly, her words spoken as a statement and not as a question catching him a little off guard. “Yes, she did. And, well, now I’m here and it’s not really something I want to be doing. But, Emily asked, and she’s my friend, and so--”
“Cut the crap and just tell me why you’re here, JJ?” Naomi cuts him off, her tone direct and flat.
JJ swallows loudly and nods his head, more to himself than to Naomi, says, “Emily asked me to relay a message to you.”
Naomi ignores the way his words make her heart ache, and fights back the tears in her eyes. “And what might that message be?”
He looks away from her when he replies, “She wants you to stay away from her.” He glances up at her with a worried expression as if he fears she’ll erupt with rage, and only when she doesn’t react does he look back at her a little more confidently while continuing, “Obviously Emily is aware that as co-workers you’ll have to see each other on a daily basis, but she’d prefer if you didn’t try to communicate with her in any way unless it has to do with work. She thinks it’s best that you give each other some space considering recent events.”
Naomi chuckles bitterly. “Oh, I’m sure she does.” She runs her hand carelessly through her hair and asks, “Am I allowed to reply to this message of hers, then?”
JJ looks momentarily bewildered until he catches on to what she’s saying, stutters, “Erm, well, she didn’t say that you couldn’t. So I guess it would be okay for me to relay a message back to her for you. What should I tell her?”
Naomi purses her lips together, tries not to let herself get upset over Emily’s request, always knew Emily would chose to do the honourable thing in the end despite how they feel about each other. She lets out a shaky breath before saying sadly, “You can tell Emily that her wish is my command.”
“You’ll leave her alone?” JJ asks carefully, wanting to reaffirm that he’s gotten this right.
“Yes, Jay. I’ll leave her alone.”
JJ nods his head silently and stands from the chair, stares at her for a long moment with a sorrowful frown and says, “I’m sorry, Naomi.”
Naomi catches the sincerity in his voice and offers him a half-smile. “No need for you to apologise. None of this is your fault, JJ.”
“Yes, well, quite... but I am sorry things aren’t different.” He says quietly before heading out of the room.
“Jay.” Naomi calls after him, catching him just as he gets to the front door. Wipes swiftly at her eyes when a couple of tears leak down her cheeks when she says, “Tell her I’m sorry, too. Okay?” He nods his head just once, before opening the door and letting himself out without another word. Naomi can’t help but think that his silence says more than anything else ever could.
-----
Where I Stood - Chapter Five: Nemesis (Part Two)