I'm sentimental when it comes to stuff.

I'm going to delete bookmarks that remind me of her and move them here:

http://animoto.com/play/hJxWTTIhXoMjrabG2wwG9A
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtBk6Y5b-Nc
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I've been avoiding posting on this journal.  I want to move on as she has and just be there for her in a friends capacity.  It was rather sad this morning when I visited facebook and saw that a girl who was with Christine in Vegas was saying how crazy it was.  The first thought was a mean comment about the girl.  Funny how we lash out at people ( Read more... )

She plagues all of my dreams.  Today I had a dream that she came to visit me and she got out of her white MPV and then she got out of the car and I was all excited.  Then a guy named Nick got out of  her passenger side.  I remember running to her and talking to her by my mailbox and asking why he was here.  She said something along the lines that ( Read more... )

I want to just tell her that I miss her, but it would probably be wrong to do.  My sister Jen texted me today to see what I was free to talk.  Guessing my mom or sister told her what happened ( Read more... )

I'm trying to be a good friend to her.  All we can handle is small talk at the moment.  It's still taking awhile to get use to.  I want to be on the top of her priority list.  Her one word responses come from when she is busy or is annoyed/avoidant.  I'm always scared that they're from having someone over.  She always did one word response to guys ( Read more... )

I find this kind of funny.  I was thinking about the whole situation and how I wished she knew what I was going through, but then I came to a sudden realization.  I wouldn't want anyone to go through this and wouldn't wish this upon my worst of enemies.  So though it hurts, I hope she does continue to be happy and if possible not let this phase her ( Read more... )

Home alone and I want her to hold me and tell me everything is alright.

I thought I would be okay for the week.  In fact, I actually welcomed the idea.  What was I thinking...?

How can this hurt so much? :\

Leaving for the airport soon to drop my parents off.  Wish I were the one leaving.  Though I don't think I would be able to have fun in Las Vegas with family.  Funny enough, Christine is leaving for Vegas a week from now.  It sucks that she'll be out having fun while I'll be more than likely depressed thinking about all the fun she is having in ( Read more... )

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xy8jdBSwAto

These emotional ups and downs are killing me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lnio-pqLPgg

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So I broke down and talked to her on the phone and online.  In a nutshell, she just doesn't want to be in a relationship at the time.  It's just too much work for her.  I'm not looking down on her reasons, to me they make sense.  Maybe they make sense because I choose to make them so.  It's whatever, there's nothing I can do and I hope she's ( Read more... )