this journal is over. i'm going to delete it in a couple of days. i'm moving to get a fresh start, so my journal deserves a fresh start too. new screen name too. if you care enough, you'll find out what it is.

i hope everything goes well for everyone.

( Read more... )

( Read more... )

since back in charlotte i've seen lauren, hugh, and kelly. being here has reminded me that there is absolutely nothing to do other than go to the record store, eat, and do drugs. i want to go back to asheville immediately ( Read more... )

41 days clean. i just got out of rehab and what's the first thing i want to do? shoot some fucking dope. i don't know what the hell is wrong with me. i know it'll take me right back to the way i felt before, i'll lose all the trust i've built up with my grandfather, i might die, BUT IT FEELS SO GOOD. i guess i'll just keep taking it one day at a ( Read more... )

i've been in the hospital for the past week and two days. i took 80 clonidine (blood pressure medicine given to me for withdrawals) and slit my wrists. apparently i lowered my blood pressure so much with the clonidine that i didn't lose but a pint or two of blood. hugh drove me to the hospital after i realized that death was going to take days. ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

at first i thought to word it "the last time we made love," but what we did that last night doesn't deserve a euphemism ( Read more... )

it's not unusual for lauren and i to scratch, bite, and smack each other at various times (i'm not really the scratcher or biter). a few days ago a fight escalated far past where it normally would, including eye gouging, stomping on broken feet, and hitting. all bullshitting aside, i reacted in a very unmanly and redneck way and lauren ended up ( Read more... )

i've been passing out drunk almost every night at like one in the morning and waking up at seven with nothing to do. it normally doesn't matter but last night i actually passed out at my own house with people over.

job interview today at wolfman. gonna get that shit nigga.


( Read more... )