"And if I die before you wake ( Read more... )

I've been struggling with a lot of stuff right now. Its just old stuff hitting me hard. Its just hard to keep it all at bay. Its also been really good just hard. Feeling down on myself, trying to just be ok with whatever is infront of me. Trying so hard and failing again and again sucks. But im gonna keep trying because its something I really want ( Read more... )

The hardest thing about highschool is its fake. Life doesn't stop just because we aren't living in a real world. We can't see or control it but there is this force that pushes our lives in differen't directions. Shit just happens and we are left pillaged and raped ( Read more... )

I need a break I really just want sometime to do and mostly figure out what I want out of life at the moment. I think its mostly my headache and my allergies, but today sucked, wasent anything that bad happened. My mood is just shit right now. Im uncertain about alot of things in my life right now and that scares me. I think I want an adventures ( Read more... )

I can think of alot of people and places I feel comfortable with. But I don't think there are many people or places that make me feel safe. To me safe is however much you messed you are accepted and you can feel for that small moment that everything is alright. For a long while I thought that being in that state forever would be the best thing for ( Read more... )

Its hard for me to recignize the joy in my life, and see Gods gifts hes giving me everyday. Its also hard for me to keep the inflow from God open. Not messing up and trying my hardest to do the right things is the only thing i can do. But also not pushing myself to hard and expecting myself to not do something I will. Taking those small commitments ( Read more... )

Today was really serial for me. I was thinking alot about what was going on in my life. I feel like somewhere along the way i've lost track of who I am. I'm worrying about so much stuff right now. Maybe I should be so I can change what i need to or maybe the hell's are just kicking my butt and im letting them. For a while now i've been happy with ( Read more... )

My work load is starting to become numb to me just part of the process of waking up and getting through to the end of the day. Although exams are next week, another thing that makes me want summer. I'm not looking forward to the rest of the school year I have felt over with highschool since junior year. Things are getting better but I don't feel ( Read more... )

I'm at a weird point in my life, I don't know if thats a bad thing. Its just different. I'm feeling a little emotionaly unstable, which can be a good thing, I'm not sure at this point. I used to hate not knowing what comes ahead of me. I'm still scared of something I can't see. So i'm scared in whats ahead of me. Not trusting completely in god to ( Read more... )

Its been awhile since I wrote. Seems like I write when I'm feelings lonely. Its a completely irrational feeling right now. I havent figured out why it is coming up. I'm kinda sick of the highschool bull shit. I am surrounded every day by something I keep wanting out of my life. I feel like I don't even have the right to complain because its been in ( Read more... )