Oh, and I'm done with my midwife ( Read more... )

We were planning to TTC again this month, but because everything was so wacky with my body, I wasn't able to read my fertility signs like usual because they were confusing.  Not to mention that I really thought I wouldn't o until later in my cycle, it happened on the earliest day I've ever o'ed (cd16).  So we missed our opportunity, mostly.  I say ( Read more... )

I am looking into getting a mother's bracelet and am trying to decide which birthstone I should get on it for the baby.
We found out in October, and by the measurements it was October when the baby died, but he/she was inside me until November when I actually miscarried. So I don't know which one I should go by to determine the birthstone.
I was ( Read more... )

So I had not seen/talked to one of my very good friends (who I used to talk to on a daily basis and see at least on a weekly basis) since right after we found out we lost the baby ( Read more... )

We decided what to do with the baby ( Read more... )

Yesterday was one month since we found out we lost our baby.  I wasn't as big of a basketcase as I thought I might be, but I was also pretty busy.

I found out my hcg went from 290 the previous Fri to 7.1 this past Fri.  So at least that is going back to "normal" now.  Normal is all such a relative thing to me now.

I thought I was done bleeding ( Read more... )

Well, I guess it wasn't completely over but now I hope it is ( Read more... )

WARNING:  This is going to be very long, descriptive and graphic.  I am quite detail oriented and have to get it out.  Also because if I can help someone who has to go through this maybe they won't have to endure such a long process as I did.
My levels had only gone down from 329 to 290 from Mon to Fri last week, really crawling, so I went ahead ( Read more... )

I had my levels drawn again today to see if by some chance they've taken a big dive in the hopes that I won't need any further intervention.

I can't believe how long this is taking.  I mean, come on already like someone else said it is bad enough to have to go through this but then to just have it drag out and out and worry each day that after all ( Read more... )

Oh and one more quick note mostly for my reference. Last night (or maybe it was this morning, my mind is still so muddled) I finally brought myself to take my pregnancy ticker off my desktop. I actually said goodbye when I took it off, but I don't think my true goodbye will come until we bury the baby (well, what we have of him/her anyway).  ( Read more... )