So everytime I try to transfer to a different better paying position at work some bizaar shit happens and I'm totlly screwed out of it. What is going on with that? Whoever is behind this message, please clarify, I'm not getting it. Why keep me there? I like to think that things happen for a reason but this is nuts ( Read more... )

I feel like hell, and its not going away. This shoulder injury is still getting the best of me, Ginger told me its because I didn't continue my Physical Therapy stretches. She's probably right. I've only been sleeping 4 hours and night, and waking up with the inability to go back to sleep. It makes me super tired at work and when I'm trying to ( Read more... )

I'm stressed to the max, and its all because people fail to recognize that they are responsible for their own happiness. I'm surrounded in a sea of sinking ships. I feel like theya re trying to pull me with them. Damn it, I hate being empathic sometimes. It's not something I can just turn off. Most importantly I'm just irritated that I'm unable to ( Read more... )

So here I sit on my break and eating my rabbit food. I'm trying to figure out what the deal is with the people I work with. For instance one comes in here in a revolving mood and it puts alot of people on edge. This week seems to be just a bad week all around, and its not even the middle of the week yet. I'm just losing my ability to tolorate moody ( Read more... )

Sunday is here and I'm feeling so much better. We got the 1st coat of varnish on the living room floor. I'm debating on whether I'm going to try to finish that today by my self, or wait until Tuesday for Jeremy to do it. I need to finish the bathroom, and I might try doing that before the One Night Stand PPV. Mike is coming over to watch that with ( Read more... )

I cried today for no other reason than I'm so stressed I can't cope. Everything has been pissing me off this week, Bart, work, not getting the house fixed fast enough, and most of all... ME. It is possible to piss yourself off? Hell Yes. I've been ready to pick a fight all day, I need a damn release and an all out fight was looking like a ( Read more... )

I'll never be able to be the person I used to be. Its just a damn fact. It pisses me off that I can't have that anymore. It pisses me off that I cry about everything. Why does some much hurt? I can't even handle someone getting mad at me without feeling like everything my fucking fault, even when its not. I feel like hell today. I'm sick and wore ( Read more... )

For the past few days I've been hovering on the edge, with buring eyes. So close to that great flood, the one that I'm never prepared for. ITs been around a year now, and the pain is still freah. The sound of her voice on the phone the other day made me feel like a trator. I don't know what to do, I'm here and she seems so very far away. I've been ( Read more... )

I'm tired of alot of things. Most of those things are people related and others just life in general. Bad things happen for no reason than the fact that they do. Its not personal on the part of nature. People make everything personal, like thinking that they are the target of some grand plan by the cosmos to screw them every chance possible. I see ( Read more... )

Well its been a long time. Things change and people change but somethings are always constant. Suffering and pain, its out there and its widespread. Buddha said that life is suffering, and I believe it. I see so much in others, I see their faults turning inward, I see them hurt. I don't know how to solve the worlds problems. I can't solve some of ( Read more... )