Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be: The Epilogue
Title: Lord, What Fools These Mortals Be
Pairing: Brittany/Santana
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: For Audition (2x01)
Summary: For this prompt on the glee_fluff_meme
Disclaimer: Don't own Glee, Shakespeare, The Spiderwick Chronicles, Pan's Labyrinth, or The Dresden Files.
Author's Notes: Just in case you didn't know, Percocet is a strong painkiller that doctors usually prescribe after minor surgery. Aaand that's all, folks. I hope you liked it! Let me know what you thought!
Chapter One ; Chapter Two ; Chapter Three ; Chapter Four
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"Santana!"
Her mother's voice brought Santana out of a strange, confused dream, leaving her with a vague sense of something left undone.
"Yeah?" she said, cracking open one eye to glare at her mother in the doorway.
"Oh, don't give me that look, it's almost 11:00," her mother snapped. "Now, I know you just got back from camp, but your school supply list came in the mail the other day, so I thought we'd get that out of the way as soon as possible. Can you be ready to leave in about an hour?"
"Yeah, yeah," Santana mumbled, closing her eye again and waving a limp hand. She heard the door shut, and tried to snuggle back down into Brittany's arms and fall asleep again, but it was no use. She was awake.
Cheer camp, she thought. I was at cheer camp. That must be why her bed felt a little unfamiliar. Because she had spent the summer with Brittany, at cheer camp.
Except, thinking about it, she couldn't really remember going to, staying at, or doing anything at all involved with cheer camp.
Oh well. If the best times of your life were the ones that you couldn't remember, because you were so drunk, then she must have had one hell of a summer. And cheer camp would definitely explain the way every muscle in her body seemed to be aching.
She sat up with a sigh, ignoring Brittany's mumbled protest. With a grunt, she stretched languidly, feeling her body protest. Scratching an itch on her stomach, she stood and shuffled into the bathroom.
And then shuffled right back out again, suddenly way more awake.
"Brittany," she hissed, shaking the other girl's shoulder. Brittany groaned and tried to burrow into her pillow. "Britt, wake up!"
Sighing heavily, Brittany opened her eyes. She smiled slowly at the sight of Santana. "Hey," she said, her voice rough with sleep.
"Brittany, I have a really weird question for you," Santana said urgently.
Brittany waited patiently. Usually she was the one with weird questions.
Now that she had Brittany's attention, Santana paused. She wasn't really sure how to phrase this without sounding like a complete idiot. "Britt...this summer..."
"...yes?" Brittany prompted her when she didn't continue.
"Brittany, did I get a boob job?" Santana blurted out.
"Um, yes?" Brittany said, like she wasn't sure of the answer. But that had to be it. Because people didn't magically go from a B to a DD overnight. That would make no sense.
"Did...did I say why?" Santana asked.
"Um..." Brittany's eyes darted from side to side, like she was trying to remember the exact phrasing. "Yeah...you said...you wanted people to notice you more?" she said hopefully.
"I did?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded. "Huh." That was weird. She had always been pretty good at the whole self-esteem thing. Being smoking hot tended to make you confident about your looks. But Brittany remembered her saying that. And Brittany would never lie to her. Not about something like this.
Besides, spending the summer in a Percocet-induced haze would explain her lack of memory. Obviously, she had gotten a boob job...then went to cheer camp? There was a flaw in the logic somewhere in there.
"Let me see them," Brittany said, and Santana's train of thought derailed almost instantly. She grabbed the hem of her shirt, then quickly flashed the other girl, laughing at the way her eyes almost popped out of their sockets. "Do that again...but slower," Brittany said, and Santana laughed again.
The last two weeks of the summer passed pretty normally. Sure, Brittany suddenly didn't want to listen to 'Just Dance' anymore, but it was overplayed anyway. And sure, Santana had developed an almost crippling fear of spiders, but spiders were creepy anyway. Their summer was, and had been, totally normal.
When they got back to school, Jacob Ben Jewfro shoved a camera into her chest and asked her breasts, in the most suggestive way possible, how her summer had gone. She smirked and told him it was uneventful. Cheer camp and breast implants. Totally normal. Then Brittany jumped in, and Santana had to bite back a laugh at her story of getting lost in the sewers.
Brittany really did say the craziest shit sometimes.
---
Pairing: Brittany/Santana
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: For Audition (2x01)
Summary: For this prompt on the glee_fluff_meme
Disclaimer: Don't own Glee, Shakespeare, The Spiderwick Chronicles, Pan's Labyrinth, or The Dresden Files.
Author's Notes: Just in case you didn't know, Percocet is a strong painkiller that doctors usually prescribe after minor surgery. Aaand that's all, folks. I hope you liked it! Let me know what you thought!
Chapter One ; Chapter Two ; Chapter Three ; Chapter Four
---
"Santana!"
Her mother's voice brought Santana out of a strange, confused dream, leaving her with a vague sense of something left undone.
"Yeah?" she said, cracking open one eye to glare at her mother in the doorway.
"Oh, don't give me that look, it's almost 11:00," her mother snapped. "Now, I know you just got back from camp, but your school supply list came in the mail the other day, so I thought we'd get that out of the way as soon as possible. Can you be ready to leave in about an hour?"
"Yeah, yeah," Santana mumbled, closing her eye again and waving a limp hand. She heard the door shut, and tried to snuggle back down into Brittany's arms and fall asleep again, but it was no use. She was awake.
Cheer camp, she thought. I was at cheer camp. That must be why her bed felt a little unfamiliar. Because she had spent the summer with Brittany, at cheer camp.
Except, thinking about it, she couldn't really remember going to, staying at, or doing anything at all involved with cheer camp.
Oh well. If the best times of your life were the ones that you couldn't remember, because you were so drunk, then she must have had one hell of a summer. And cheer camp would definitely explain the way every muscle in her body seemed to be aching.
She sat up with a sigh, ignoring Brittany's mumbled protest. With a grunt, she stretched languidly, feeling her body protest. Scratching an itch on her stomach, she stood and shuffled into the bathroom.
And then shuffled right back out again, suddenly way more awake.
"Brittany," she hissed, shaking the other girl's shoulder. Brittany groaned and tried to burrow into her pillow. "Britt, wake up!"
Sighing heavily, Brittany opened her eyes. She smiled slowly at the sight of Santana. "Hey," she said, her voice rough with sleep.
"Brittany, I have a really weird question for you," Santana said urgently.
Brittany waited patiently. Usually she was the one with weird questions.
Now that she had Brittany's attention, Santana paused. She wasn't really sure how to phrase this without sounding like a complete idiot. "Britt...this summer..."
"...yes?" Brittany prompted her when she didn't continue.
"Brittany, did I get a boob job?" Santana blurted out.
"Um, yes?" Brittany said, like she wasn't sure of the answer. But that had to be it. Because people didn't magically go from a B to a DD overnight. That would make no sense.
"Did...did I say why?" Santana asked.
"Um..." Brittany's eyes darted from side to side, like she was trying to remember the exact phrasing. "Yeah...you said...you wanted people to notice you more?" she said hopefully.
"I did?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded. "Huh." That was weird. She had always been pretty good at the whole self-esteem thing. Being smoking hot tended to make you confident about your looks. But Brittany remembered her saying that. And Brittany would never lie to her. Not about something like this.
Besides, spending the summer in a Percocet-induced haze would explain her lack of memory. Obviously, she had gotten a boob job...then went to cheer camp? There was a flaw in the logic somewhere in there.
"Let me see them," Brittany said, and Santana's train of thought derailed almost instantly. She grabbed the hem of her shirt, then quickly flashed the other girl, laughing at the way her eyes almost popped out of their sockets. "Do that again...but slower," Brittany said, and Santana laughed again.
The last two weeks of the summer passed pretty normally. Sure, Brittany suddenly didn't want to listen to 'Just Dance' anymore, but it was overplayed anyway. And sure, Santana had developed an almost crippling fear of spiders, but spiders were creepy anyway. Their summer was, and had been, totally normal.
When they got back to school, Jacob Ben Jewfro shoved a camera into her chest and asked her breasts, in the most suggestive way possible, how her summer had gone. She smirked and told him it was uneventful. Cheer camp and breast implants. Totally normal. Then Brittany jumped in, and Santana had to bite back a laugh at her story of getting lost in the sewers.
Brittany really did say the craziest shit sometimes.
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