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I woke in tears a few minutes ago. I sleep so much now that when I initially woke I couldn't remember if it was am or pm.
I am so unhappy. None of my friends have been in touch despite receiving texts from me. Every wasted day is just like the last - full of pain, sadness, frustration and the promise of endless days like it to follow.
I had a life ( Read more... ) -
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Although I miss my Dad as I said, it is wonderful to be able to walk around my flat at night when I can't sleep. I am unsettled yes but it will ease. As for my friends, they can do as they please, I'll not give my loyalty again so easily but I will be fine, I have always coped alone and enjoyed my independence so with or without them I will find ( Read more... ) -
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I see women and girls who are both younger and older than myself. They are slim, attractive, able-bodied, employed, active, have partners and look to be enjoying life. This is not me, I should be all these things but I never reach the minimum target. Friends tell me I'm just as good as everyone else but when push comes to shove I can't even walk.
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I feel very tired and upset. The riots in NE London have spread to Hackney where Mikey and I are. We are both afraid. Today was our last day together and we hoped to spend it having fun - not to be.
I feel tearful and drained as we both head to bed.
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.
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How much longer?
The pain is very bad tonight, my right leg feels like it has an electric charge running through it, it's agony when I try to sit, stand or bend and my leg keeps giving way under me. I had reduced the MG of my codeine but it is no longer enough to control this.
This is what it felt like when the pain first started in my left leg, it was intolerable ( Read more... )
