i'm going insane and i don't know what to do, things are getting to a point where i don't even know who or what i am.  why am i blind to life why is everything nothing and what is it that i'm going through.  i'm losing the point of things and i'm losing myself,  i have no feeling.  fuck for so long i haven't felt anything.  for christ sake i went ( Read more... )

i suppose i should write a little more being as that i don't ever get to get online that much so i'll ask some questions to the views in the audience ( Read more... )

hum ( Read more... )

where am i? i'm lost and i don't have the internet that's where i am. no phone and no car no life at all. soon i'll start working cause i'm finally not sick but i have no more friends. no one left to be here for me. i've lost everything nothing was saved from the storm ( Read more... )

it's such a wierd thing how i can love music with no voices so much and not be attracted to hardly any music With words. I mean i enjoy all kinds of music but the only sounds that spark my heart are wordless rivers of musical extacy. I'm listening to Rhapsody in Blue by gershwin ( Read more... )

some time it's been since last i've written. to many thoughts and to many things to take care of and definitly not enough time to get these things done. I should have my car fixed in the next few days and so my life will be totally changed and improved upon. I shall be able to go OUT and meet with these people in the world about that i've not ( Read more... )

watching the waters as they all come so near never to know or never to see ( Read more... )

I hate crying, and yet i love it so. For me tears are more difficult than could be imagined. Yet what i get from them is greater than could be measured ( Read more... )

i ponder the things we all call time, and wonder at what people feel is so divine. wow, my nephew just woke up and ... jesus i don't ever want children. I'm a monster. A horrible creature of destruction. On the outside i show a demeanor of peace and love, a creature of harmony, when inside i'm a torrent of emotion, thrashing about in a world ( Read more... )

i'm a fiend. a person who plots and plans and has his own inner machinations thought out. Where do you start over? How is it a person actually is what they are ( Read more... )