Contrary to popular opinion, my prolonged lack of online presence is not explained by me being detained.  Rather, I had traveled to a part of the world that completely lacked Internet access, and I proceeded to annihilate the entire population in that region as I firmly believe that anyone who cannot get online does not deserve to live ( Read more... )

So I was in a building that was completely contained by an army of some 50 soldiers with machine guns who wanted to take me out.  They were not well skilled, unfortunately for them, as I was able to exploit their occupation entirely by sneaking up behind each one and stabbing him in the back of the head with my knife.  All in all it took me about ( Read more... )

I thought I lost something that was very important to me. It was a case with papers. A case of papers, I guess you could say. A case with papers. But not a paper case ( Read more... )

I met Val Kilmer today. We went on a killing spree. He's pretty good at helping me kill, so I let him live. We killed 268 people together.

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I was trying to meditate on who I was going to kill next, when some fat guy fell through my chimney. I inquired about his purpose, and his response was that because of my supposedly bad actions this year it was his intention to exterminate me. I offered him some eggnog and rum, then proceeded to present the raped and predominant arguing theory ( ( Read more... )

I watched the movie Revolver the other day, and there is a man in the movie who wallhacks in RL. Does anyone know where I can get the patch to be able to do that? It would save me a lot of trouble of having to pry doors open, break through windows, chase people and try to find the hiding victims.

I decided that I was going to go on a road trip and kill all of the people who have me added on LJ here. I thought I would do it in alphabetical order, so I got into my car and began driving towards Washington. Unfortunately, I ran out of gasoline five minutes later. I looked to my right, and there was a school play yard and they were having a ( Read more... )

I went to a bukkake party earlier. There were many bukkakers. I ended up killing them all though.

Well, it's time for me to pack and move out again. I've finally killed everyone in this town, so it's difficult to get people to cook for me and crap. You may be asking, "aren't you going to eventually starve if you plan on killing everyone?" Well, no. I'm not. There are two reasons ( Read more... )