I'm having the shittiest luck trying to secure housing. It's so expensive right now and apparently I'm competing with married couples for one bedrooms and studios. I've seen like a handful of beautiful apartments and I've obviously failed to secure one. All of my friends are squared away with housing too which is great for them but often depresses ( Read more... )

I haven't felt this anxious since summer break began. It was triggered by the stupid tiniest thing that I happened to see and I think that combined with all the stress I've been trying to manage about finding an apartment made me snap. I'm so upset and I can't stop crying and panicking and my medicine isn't doing shit and I'm just in all sorts of ( Read more... )

MY FRIEND IS AN ASS BUTT THAT IS SO UNFORRRRTUNATE SIKE SHE'S AIGHT

poop in my mouth world MWAH I WUV YOU ALL :DDDD

I'm kind of bummed cos I had some involvement in suggesting that my friends throw an MJ dance party to compensate for a lack of any in Philadelphia. It sounds like there are tentative plans for one but that it's going to be really late and it bums me out when I can't work around my disadvantages. It's too dark to walk back to Swarthmore again (if ( Read more... )

I'm trying to do my best to manage what triggers my panicking and my attitude (trying to look at things in an encouraging and normal way instead of the distressed mindset i'm used to), and it kind of works but it's a lot of work. The moment I got to my mom's though I begin to feel my nerves and started to panic. I guess it just feels like a ton of ( Read more... )

no one will ever fucking know how much it sucks to fall asleep in a panic, wake up in a panic, and go through the entirety of your day in a panic. Hours feel so long. No one knows or cares. It's a very painful loneliness and the entire time is filled with your mind conjuring the worst.

I want to get out of my skin so bad. A panic attack without medicine is so persistent and painful, and especially when it that anxiety and fear doesn't dim down and is retriggered. It breaks my heart that I can't be alone. I haven't been able to go back to sleep and we don't have any sort of pm pill or sleep medicine. Everything hurts and my mind's ( Read more... )

I feel sad and restless. I wish I didn't have to do this thing tomorrow so that I can work through the sad and restlessness until it turns into numbness, which is a lot more manageable than sadness and restlessness.

I can't afford to go to therapy tomorrow and my mom can't afford to pay to send me and I feel like I'm really gonna regret that soon.