Everything hurts. I had a really bad day. I suck at French. I wish I didn't think about him all the time seeing as he dosn't even like me.

I just talked to my friend about his drug useage. I know that it is only pot...but sometimes that is just the beginng, I've seen it happen. But I have been worried about him for a while, a lot. he assured me that it is only pot, and if it starts to get out of control he will talk to me. He talked me for caring enough...which made me feel really ( Read more... )

Last night I couldn't make myself bleed. And it made me so mad. I hate myself for everything that I have done. There are things that I will always be, all of my life. I will have always inflicted pain on myself, always have gone to bed starving hoping to lose half a pound...its just weird, I can't change these things ever, as long I live they will ( Read more... )

wow...its been almost a year since i posted in this thing. I kinda forgot about it ( Read more... )

I was doing pretty good

It had been about three moths

THREE!!!

But then I cut five times on my side.

Why?

I honestly have no idea.

Crap...It still hurts.

Whatever...we're moving on my birthday (19th) to a bigger house, I finally get my own room.

This was a pretty much pointless post.

and it hurts so bad. Whenever things just start to feel like there okay, it's not. Things will never be okay. When I eat and when I feel fat I get this feeling like my entire body is just a suit, I want to get out of it ( Read more... )

i guess i havnt really updated that much. there's not much to say though. im not failing any of my classes which is really big for me (82, 92, 100) so far... i havnt really been doing anything lately, but i dont want to go see my shrink ever again. we started talking about cutting the last time i saw her, like forever ago ( Read more... )

sometimes, when i feel really sad and shit. i start thinking about my ex (which is odd cuz im mad at him right now for being such a asshole to my friend...and because we broke up forever ago) but anyway, on the rare moment that i do think about him i get really angry with myself. he was so great to me and i was a piece of shit girlfriend. i wouldnt ( Read more... )

a survay of all the movies ive seen..yippie

( Read more... )

i hope she dosnt tell my mom. oh god what if she tells my mom. why did i even talk? a simple "no" could have worked. she wouldnt have asked questions. she wouldnt have wanted to talk. she wouldnt have wanted details. i am such a fucking dumbass. why do i randomly spill my guts, then sometimes, nothing at all.

i am so confused...and pretty scared