so i am going to briefly touch on the events of last night because i simply cannot contain my terrified excitement. i know it's all been said before but this time it's just very fucking different. last night i had the most REAL conversation i have had with nathaniel in years. we yelled, and then we fucked, and while we were fucking we talked and we ( Read more... )

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nathaniel hate's me, and i hate myself so at least we are all in agreement. but no really, every time i talk to nathaniel i feel like crying, i feel like crying now so i might as well. i freaked out because nathaniel wouldn't give me his myspace password because i think he talks to girls and i just can't stand it. i want him to want me like i want ( Read more... )

sam is like dead because of it.




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leslie tells me living well would be the best revenge, and i think she's right.

four more days until well, y'know.

life is grand. i am a bartender at the cajun queen but i think everybody there hates me, but not really. and i have two new dudes in my life, its sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet

i want to do everything different. maybe then,

i can't wait to get out of this city. i have fucked up all of my relationships with the people i love, made the bad relationships with the people i hate even worse, and even started screwing things up with people i don't know. besides i think anything worth doing is worth doing badly. my mother who watches celebrity rehab with dr.drew told me that ( Read more... )

i don't need anybody to tell me they love me, cause i know he does.

i took it back cause it's just for me.

i go hard i fight hard i love hard