Potter, your new wild-man yeti appearance is a direct result of your own idiocy and incompetence. Kindly refrain from placing the blame on me. Also, know that it is not a good look for you. You look foolishly young and rather like you cannot grow proper facial hair. I wasn’t aware a person could screw up something as simple as a beard, but your ( Read more... )

Oh woe is me,
An overgrown budgie
Pink as can be
Oh woe is me.

I cannot, will not be subjected to this any longer. I DEMAND TO BE RETURNED TO MY HUMAN FORM. If it wasn't bad enough that I was subjected to the curious stares and ignorant comments of every nitwit in the school, now I'm forced to endure perverts around every corner. SO HELP ME ( Read more... )

Luckily the potion hasn't affected Sirius' shagging technique...

But, I don't suppose anyone knows of a counter-potion for the Amortentia potion...?

Of course not, there isn't one... Hopefully it will wear off.

Would anyone care to join me for a drink?

Black. Never speak to me again. Ever.

Ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined, ruined! But how do I fix it...?Any Slytherin student looking for an 'A' on his next exam will come to the dungeons ( Read more... )

Gryffindors! The day that they become anything less than "moral, upstanding citizens" is the day the world finally gives in and collapses under the weight of their giant egos.

Do you think that I don't know what you're doing behind my back, Sirius Black? You think I don't notice when certain sparkly, glittery thongs disappear? You think you're ( Read more... )

DON'T THINK THAT YOU KNOW WHAT ACTIONS I TAKE AFTER YOU PISS ME OFF, SIRIUS BLACK! JUST BECAUSE I DID CHOOSE TO PUT A GLAMOUR ON AND APPARATE OUT TO A MUGGLE TOWN TO GET COMPLETELY SMASHED, DON'T THINK YOU KNOW ME!!

And now I'd like to introduce you all to my muggle friend, Steve. Steve the bum!

( We had GREAT FUN! LOOKING AT GIRLY MAGS AND SHARING BOOZE! )

I WAS ALMOST GLAD MY STUPID HAIR WAS FINALLY GETTING LONGISH AGAIN. DAMN YOU, REMUS LUPIN! HAS THE WORLD GONE ENTIRELY MAD ( Read more... )

One bright spot in today is that Hogsmeade's resident werewolf problem will be shortly taken care of, I've seen to it myself. Although, sadly, my solution may not take effect until the third day of the full moon. Still, it will be taken care of. And the poison will be very, VERY disagreeable...Otherwise, Friday the 13th has been as unpleasant as ( Read more... )

PERHAPS, REMUS LUPIN, YOU SHOULD READ THE OWLS SENT TO YOU BEFORE BARGING INTO OTHER PEOPLE'S PERSONAL LIVING SPACE. I SWEAR TO MERLIN, YOU WILL BE SORRY, YOU FILTHY WEREWOLF. YOU WILL REGRET NOT LISTENING TO ME MORE THAN YOU HAVE EVER REGRET ANYTHING IN YOUR ENTIRE SAD, SORRY, PATHETIC LITTLE EXISTENCE!

I don't know who made that potion intended for Potter, but whomever it was will suffer my wrath when I find you. I know you took those potion supplies...If the potion hadn't been so well made I almost would suspect Potter, himself, looking for attention... That and he couldn't ad-lib worth shite after I ran onto stage...And, now that the ( Read more... )