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Exhausted but Happy
I am so damn lucky. Tonight, after cooking and eating dinner with the family I was so tired. I wished I had a house keeper to wash my dishes. Before I can say anything else Rayn has stood up and is washing the dishes. I am so damn lucky. He is such a good kid. Right now he is thinking about being an FBI Agent. All I can think is that he will be ( Read more... ) -
Lost & Found
I wasn’t certain I would find this place again when I started looking. It’s like finding ruins deep in the woods. Ruins you used to play on. Every angle reveals a new memory or one you can’t even actually remember. You blow the dust off of it and look at it in wonder as if it were this really new totally familiar shiny bauble. You turn it over in ( Read more... ) -
Running Babble
I have been running for almost nine weeks now. I thought I would hate it when I first started, but as it turns out I love running. I like the feel of my feet hitting the pavement, my breath moving in and out of my chest. My awareness of my body heightens for the first part of the run. I am acutely aware of my breathing, the stiffness in my hips ( Read more... ) -
The world in a moment
My mind is filled to the brim with two different topics that connect at certain points, and they both want out! But the jumble in my mind is hard to sort through tonight. Thoughts dashing, dancing, spinning, and there is no control to this chaos in my mind, no order. So I suppose I will just start with the first words that fly through my fingers ( Read more... ) -
Two hours
Two hours of sleep is not enough for me to function on. I can function on five, but two is not nearly enough. And so in order to survive my day I have been giving the kids fun things to do. We cleaned out the kiddie pool, refilled it with fresh water, and then we had a water fight in which my weapon was the hose. :) You may not think that is fair, ( Read more... ) -
To toot or not to toot
So I thought you might all need a fictional story about a Mama named Andrea and a toddler named Tobin, but please keep in mind that this is all fictional. Because I don't really fart. Ever. I don't even toot. No such thing happens in this house ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
Today was not one of my better days. It ended up being a tummy bug. I had to cancel my normal Munchkin care, Rayn's playdate didn't happen here, and John had to come home and care for the kids. Rayn was so amazing. I asked him to help me with Tobin until John got home. He didn't whine or complain he played with his brother while I stayed in the ( Read more... ) -
Stress
Not feeling fantastic this morning. I think stress and a lack of sleep have caught up with me. I opened my eyes and pried my jaw open trying to shake off the last vestiges of the stress dream I was having. In my dream I was hosting Thanksgiving for 18 only to realize four hours before dinner that I only had one slice of turkey. My Mom was there ( Read more... ) -
Dreams
I had a fantastic and strange dream last night. I didn't sleep for most of the night, but then towards morning I was dozing in and out and I dreamed of a dragon who was hunting me. He was a red and fiery creature and could turn into a human man as well. I was collecting clues and trying to find him before he could find me. I was not scared, I ( Read more... ) -
Slowly crawling out of the cave
So very tired and yet I can't seem to go to sleep. I know this is usually a side effect of my depression, and it is true that I have been depressed the last few weeks. I also noticed that my posting online drops off when I am depressed. I guess it is hard to reach out to others when I want to hide in a cave. Maybe tomorrow I will have the ( Read more... )