am i supposed to be really sad and depressed and leave really sad and depressing comments in order to get any feedback??..that's what it seems like..and even then nobody really seems to care.

later saturday i ended up going to the holyoke mall with jacquie and another alex (a boy alex who likes boys) to do not much more than i was already doing. i touched up my hair now it looks really, really hot..(really, really blonde.) i didn't do much yesterday. i walked hubert and everett (two amazingly cute boston terriers) down the street.all ( Read more... )

ok. so this is how yesterday went: jackie( i can't spell her name right) and i went to the conneticut show last night. we realized that all in all there are more good bands in conneticut than in westfield. we didn't know anyone. well, jackie met the singer of one of the bands, single bullet theory, online..myspace, so we were going to meet him.. ( Read more... )

ok..hmmm.i'm going to the show in conneticut tonight that i said i wasn't going to go to. jacquie didn't want to go by herself. hmm. i just had a hearing and eye test..i aced it. yeahhh..hmmm. im pretty hungry right now. oh man. ok... so...im going to the show. and this weekend sometime am bleaching my hair. even though i want to save some money to ( Read more... )

where to start, where to start...hmmm......nykki and i need to have a better hang out plan. i think we're supposed to hang out this weekend. hah. monday was pretty interesting though. oh man. i found some books that are quite good. the librarian ordered them so i can read them. i wish they were my own. there's like 3 books like this that i know of ( Read more... )

im hanging out with nikki today..not for a long time but thats ok, we can probably make other plans to hang out sometime after today. hmmm. i smoked yesterday..it wasn't great stuff but thats ok. i got wicked munchies after that..ummm...guys are really stupid. everyone probably knows how i fucked things up with bob and i..nothings happening with ( Read more... )

things seem to be ok. bob and i are ok. it's different..but we can still have a normal conversation. hmmm ( Read more... )

i feel worthless. it doesn't matter why. it is none of your concern. bob probably already let people know what happened. there are understandable reasons although i should have tried harder to control myself. ..should have..not could have..i didn't stand a chance ( Read more... )

everytime i seem to come on here. something cool from my lj page goes away. last time the color went from black to a greenish color which i really didn't mind. today i came on and the thing where when you go to click on something it blurs..went away. i feel like crap. i called bob's house and cell phone yesterday about a million times. i just ( Read more... )

starting today i'll be staying after everyday to do my homework. i need to get way better grades. i really need to see bob! i can't wait till i can see him again. i know it's gonna be great but when that day comes it will probably see 10x better than i thought it would be. (which is vaguely impossible because i know already that it will be amazing ( Read more... )