The robust flavor of my spit makes me want to package it and sell it as a marinade for meats. I would call it Spit'n'Chew. It would be marketed towards truck drivers and their bearded wives. Spit'n'Chew is a hearty blend of my own spittle and sinus mucus, bits of leather, and chives that gives meat an even meatier flavor after only twenty minutes ( Read more... )

Ha-ha, my last entry was about pooping.

"I don't think you get it, Johnny Two-nickels ( Read more... )

I haven't written anything lately mostly because my intelligence level has dropped to that of a hamburger patty(uncooked). Please send any information on how I can sell my limbs or any other body parts for money. My lips are chapped.

You know what? I hate school more than anything I have ever hated in my life. The funny thing is that I've been going to school since I was five. I've never liked it. Another wierd thing about school is that it hasn't really changed at all since about 6th grade. As a graduating senior in college I find that to be a sad thing. Maybe it's just that I ( Read more... )

I am, as of now, getting rid of almost all the junk in my house. For those of you that have been to my house, you know that means almost everything. If anyone wants anything, let me know. I'd be glad to get rid of it.

I'm light headed and I don't know why. I hope I don't die. I may pass out and fall down a flight of stairs. Sometimes I want to make out with a toothless dog.

GO SEE EVIL DEAD LIVE!!!!!!

Hey! Evil Dead LIVE is April 29th, 30th, and May 1st. Tickets are $15 each. For those of you who don't know what the hell this is all about, Evil Dead Live is a live version of Evil Dead 2 with parts of Evil Dead and Army of Darkness mixed in. The show tells the story of the Evil Dead Trilogy, but mostly the second one.(which is the best one anyway ( Read more... )

I think that The amount of shit in my colon outweighs my brain. Who cares, they're mat out of the same stuff anyway.