okay, so i think im going as prince to the 80's party- but i need some ideas. does anyone know where the fuck i can get, like, frilly things? or some shit? jen's gonna help me shop on thursday, but i should plan this out first. i mean, where do you go to buy a bright fucking purple skin tight body suit? its not exactly the kind of thing carried at ( Read more... )

spending all day at the library is like violent masturbation, in that i end up walking funny and pissing blood ( Read more... )

in other news, a movie about man eating slugs did better in theatres than basic instinct 2.
what does that say about sharon stones remaining sex appeal?

worse still, basic instinct 2, or, as i like to call it, "middle-aged soccer moms gone wild", did about as poorly as larry the cable guy: health inspector. i dont even want to know what that says ( Read more... )

being in dire need of pants i went out and purchased some new clothes and shoes for the first time in about 3 years, just in time to have my car battery die once and for all. the bastard had just enough juice for me to drive to a really inconvenient location way out on the edge of town before deciding to leave me stranded ( Read more... )

today i had such a loud and satisfying burp that i inadvertently drooled immediately afterwards, thereby causing dave to almost regurgitate his recently consumed mcdonalds. it may have been the most satisfying bodily emission of the week; in order to be sure, i should probably check the records ( Read more... )

i need someone to burn me some cds! i will pay cash money or perform oral sex or both. and im not even kidding ( Read more... )

is it too soon for a coming back party?

i mean, i've been home for like 3 weeks, but that's not the point. yesterday someone fronted the idea of a "junior high" party, where you dress like you did in junior high, and the whole thing seems so wonderfully embarrassing i think it has to be done. i'll need a really baggy tee and a tattered flannel ( Read more... )

sorry to all who encountered my drunken stupidity yesterday, specifically jen, dave, mary, marys downstairs neighbors, everyone at the bar, the merrill desk workers, the sweeney desk workers, jen, and everyone in between.

if you feel like calling me anytime soon, too bad. i ran up a massive phone bill in cali and had it turned off again; im now in severe financial straits, getting angry letters from people i owe money to ( Read more... )

we ran out of money, so we came back from california ( Read more... )