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(Untitled)
Almost everything I have come up with I've self-sabatoged, either by not completly following through on it or by picking things I know he can't follow through on. This means I want to fail, either because I can't handle the fact that one thing is ruining the relationship and I'm trying to make myself unhappy enough to leave, or because I want the ( Read more... ) -
Games
So I know what the games are. Besides a way to deflect my worries about money, they are a false sense of achievement. When I am truly doing well, they don't absorb me like this. Even worse, for some reason I don't think while I play. When I read, I think. Oh, its somewhere unconscious. But I know its there, because when I am done I feel different. ( Read more... ) -
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It would, no doubt, be helpful if I wrote in this before I hit the crisis point. Then you guys would have some idea of what was going on, and i could maybe catch shit like this before it turned into said crisis. Oh well, so much for self-responsibility ( Read more... ) -
Urges
I need to go back to being who I used to be. Who would have thought that concentrating so hard on staying the same would change you? I've ignored these urges to write for so long that I can't even remember how to let it flow..I have to think about it and its annoying me ( Read more... ) -
Obstacles
http://www.dailygood.org/more.php?n=3689Read more... ) -
A plan
I wonder if people want to be alone with their thoughts, but feel like they should be doing something and so play video games and then don't think? I mean, when I'm class my mind is going a mile a minute thinking about all kinds of crazy shit, and then I get home and play some WoW and your brain just kinda stops. Why can't you think and play at the ( Read more... ) -
pollen is the bad guy =/
I've been writing in here for a while now, all private because I bitch so much. lol. I miss all of you though, plus I'm sure sooo many of you are interested in whats going on in my life. Right ( Read more... ) -
(Untitled)
This'll be short, cause I'm just waiting for mom and Janet to get back ( Read more... )