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No One Knows
No one really knows how I feel. I assume people think I'm getting better, but the truth is, I'm just learning how to hide my emotions better. For example, I go to the bathroom to cry at work. Wipe my eyes, go back to my station and put on a smile. Today a girl noticed I had been crying. I guess my eyes were red or something. Of course I denied it ( Read more... ) -
God Hates Me
Lately I've been having this overwhelming feeling that God hates me. I've been having these terrible thoughts against God that I can't control like, "I hate God" or "Forget God". I really, really don't mean it but these thoughts have been plaguing me for a long time. God knows my every thought, which scares me to death. I'm never at peace because ( Read more... ) -
Numb
Nothing really to say today, either. I just feel empty. Even when I'm laughing and smiling, I still don't feel quite there. So I leave you with another quote:
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Sleep is the Best Medicine
Two days off of work. Going to sleep the days away.
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Quotes
No words today, but these quotes I found will speak for me.
"In a strange way, I had fallen in love with my depression. … I loved it because I thought it was all I had. I thought depression was the part of my character that made me worthwhile. I thought so little of myself, felt that I had such scant offerings to give to the world, that the one ( Read more... ) -
High Expectations Lead to Disappointment
I used to be afraid of losing my mom. If she was late coming home, I would be convinced she died in a car accident, and I would spend several minutes crying and pacing until she came home. The relief was short lived, because I would find something else to worry about. Get your mammogram, get your pap smear, lose weight, go to the doctor! The more I ( Read more... ) -
I didn't ask for this...
I didn't ask to be born. I wasn't given a choice. I would have said no. I would of begged God to prevent it. Is this some kind of cruel, sick joke? I am the most disgusting, selfish, worthless piece of crap there is. I want to die. I need to die. The people on the Internet are right: I'm just another attention-seeking idiot. I'm not going to kill ( Read more... ) -
The Ignorance is Real
I'm sick of people saying suicide is selfish.
Yes, I agree that it is a terrible thing. Although I do have suicidal thoughts every waking moment of every day, I will NEVER tell someone it is okay to kill themselves. However, the reasons people give for believing suicide is selfish are, more often than not, selfish in themselves. For example:
1) ( Read more... ) -
Goodbye 2014…
And goodbye to the old me ( Read more... )
