im back.
my drinking is dwindling
my anxiety getting worse.
it is yet again time
this is my best copeing method

( Read more... )

I feel like Im losing control and Im pissed. Im letting other people influence my behavior and I just wont have it anymore.I cant sleep and Im pissed. Im running out of goddamn pills and I know that I ought to start putting days in between them but I dont know if I can. for godsake I just need another bottle. I keep saying Im not going to be such a ( Read more... )

Ugh so I got wayy off track today. Tomarrow Im going to start again. I havent fucked up to bad but they made me eat in the hospital in order to leave ( Read more... )

Im begining to just want to give in. Im really unhappy. Super unhappy. Maybe I should just let my stupid heart fail. All this hard work feels like nothing. Like im not getting anywhere. I dont feel supported I simply feel gossiped about. I feel like I have NO ONE I can talk to hear. My problems are stupid to them. They dont understand how I can ( Read more... )

im losing it. I hate life. I'll never get below 105lbs im such a failure. I cant believe how depressed I am. some one help me

its freezing out. i dont even want to get out of bed. i dont have to be up till later but im awake and i cant sleep. im feeling down and superdepressed. its my 4th day of the plan and im doing good i think. i haved weighed myself yet its to cold although my curiousity is dragging me out of bed. fine i'll do it i'll weigh myself. i'll be right back ( Read more... )

i finally got to weigh myself. 108lbs bitches. still im gonna get down to atleast 102lbs

Im crying rigt now. I never cry. I dont know why im so depressed. Im so unahppy. I fasted agian today i stopped feeling hunger pains i bet i lost weight and yet Im not happy. my life feels like its stopping. nothing will ever stop this hurt.

YAY go me. I just did a 20 min Pilaties DVD and ( Read more... )