My computer was too busy having ass sex with other homosexual computers to function properly, so I made Justin post this journal. It seemed imperative to me that you saw these lyrics as soon as was humanly possible ( Read more... )

You know how people have those security buddies... "if we're both 35 and not married, we'll marry each other"? I was thinking, the reason you set the date so far into the future is because both of you are going to be searching for a significant other right up until the day you have to marry each other. OBVIOUSLY, you don't want to marry this ( Read more... )

sweetjesusonrye: you wanna fight ( Read more... )

Thank you to the old lady who works at the Firehouse Grill in the Student Union for depositing a good portion of her weave into Brahn's french fries at lunch today. However gross and disturbing it may have been to see him pulling baked in pieces of hair out of his food, it was still amusing. I probably wouldn't have laughed as much as I did if ( Read more... )

When I was 12 years old, my 7th grade history teacher presented the idea that Communism was not so different from the teachings of Jesus- you heard right- Jesus and Communism; one and the same. Every kid who was in a Christian religion class at the time nearly lynched the bastard, while all the Jewish kids were looking at each other saying, "Jesus ( Read more... )

Okay guys, this one is serious ( Read more... )

"Always a pair ( Read more... )

Congratulations to jazzykate, who has visited my live journal more than anyone else, including me. (amused)

Public Service Announcement: The people around you are not as stupid and oblivious as you think they might be; watch your fucking step. I have a long, long fuse with a nuclear warhead at the end of it so be careful where you create

I'd just like to squash all the rumors that Dawn of the Dead is a good movie. It's just not true. First of all, the whole idea of the movie is supposed to be that when Hell is full, the dead will roam the earth. Well that tid-bit is mentioned ONCE throughout the whole f-ing movie. "Hell doesn't sell these days". Well, I don't think I'd buy ( Read more... )

The problem with fabric softener is that it seems so harmless ( Read more... )