halfway (or rather one-third way) through The Bell Jar and beginning to believe that awesome female writers seem to start with the name Sylvia. Sylvia Plath, Sylvia Brownrigg ( Read more... )

when i sit by myself and cry silent tears
are the times i miss you the most
didn't really share these tears with anyone else but you
and the thought of your absence only serves to compound everything

think i'm through and through

its as though 21 really marked the turning point of people around me.and i wish this was a happy "YAY" change but no - real, true, better change is often hard.

and it has been hard for us.but hang on, i'll always be here for you, my friends (you know who you are)

When I set my eyes on you,
You look like a kitty
And when you're in the moon,
Oh, you look so pretty

the hardest part is not being able to be there for you

drink hot steamed milk <3 <3 while reading books---finish Franz Kakfa, start on The Scarlet Letter and The Picture of Dorian Grey
then Godfather, Fight Club, Schindler's List, possibly rewatch Pulp Fiction
and not forgetting sleep. pure glorious unadulterated sleep

simple pleasures like that (:

saw something that i wasn't supposed to see
it did hurt in a way. but it reminded me of all the things that were wrong with us
i guess i'm finally ready to move on as in properly let this go and well... move on
and well it will hurt and hurt but one day i will really smile and mean it

"Look" I say, pointing in silly childish excitement. But as I turn my head to see your reaction, I see you there lying by my side, cute and crumpled with your mouth slightly open, bathed in peaceful, golden sleep ( Read more... )

i know things are different now, because things couldn't be worse than those 3 years i spent in misery trying to climb out of that hole i dug myself in. i have You now, truly.and in a way i'm more sure of what i am and what i want. but still. some days i just bury myself in bed. some simple trick to forget - at least temporarily. and then my dreams ( Read more... )