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Sally, my friend Wanda sangs reah good. She also a lot bigga then meh. i tryn eat mo an mo ta get big like her, cuz she got all da friends. even my bo' be lickin' up her mor n'meh. what shuld i do ta make my bo' lick up me mo and get me sum mo fiernds?

-Missy J

Wail, Missy J, Ah know Ah'm gonna hafta say that it don't matter if'n you is fat or ( Read more... )

shiks

Dearest Sally-

How can I get my boyfriend to stop lying and cheating all the time?

P.S. You're the greatest.

Wail, first off, I'd say you gots yourself a little problem. I don't care who you is or what you does, but you ain't no doormat, and you shouldn't act like one. If'n you think you can't leave this man, like Ah suggest, then you jest ( Read more... )

Hey, y'all! Mah sister, Darlene, has fannly got herself a LiveJernal! She is sharin' a jernal at the_hamlins Look fer her posts!

plumlicoriceDear Fat Sally ( Read more... )

Anonymous ( Read more... )

peepeedeedlydee

Subject: Why?
Dear Sally,

I don't understand, but every time I go to my local church, my preacher attempts to put a potato in my intimate places! Why does he do this? Should I feel guilty for liking it? Please help me!

- hopeless unbeliever

Dear hopeless shitbag. Yor preacher ain't right. He should know he supposed to mash them dadburn potatos ( Read more... )

socratesthewise

Subject: Contemplate...
Hey, Girl. ~>^-^<~ I've been watching your journal for a while and I must admit it seems positively enlightening...so what do you believe is the meaning of life?

Kiss kiss. >.<

Wail. Ah do believe that the meanin' of life is t'be found within the soul, an' not within the world.

( Journal Entry Two )

mrfuckerI have a problem finding wimmens my size (I'm three feet tall) who will appreciate my gherkin-like lovetool. Most of the wimmens i meat pick me up and try to use mah entire body as a dildo! I'm sick and tired of it but also I do not want to masturbate to amputee porn for the rest of my life. I want a sexual relationship as well as an emotional one ( Read more... )

bran_sniffum

MY ANUS HAS BEEN HURTING A LOT LATELY. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO FIX IT? :(

Wail. Y'gonna need eight things ( Read more... )