im_a_fork
I want to know what you think about my SEXUALITY.

Am I a dinner fork or a salad fork?

Wail. Ah do declare. A simpleton could figger out by the way ya talk that you's jest a dang old flimsy salad fork... but I see a deeper need. An urge that's uncontrollable. Y'need to be dominated! That's when ya gon' find out what ya truly is. Ain't mah place t ( Read more... )

dancingdrew

Sally--will I ever find a woman who doesn't want to eat me all up?

Drew, that's jest an expresshun. Y'all from the south wouldn't understayund. Wail, let me explain. When summin' says you looks good enough to eat or that they's gon' eat ya all up, it means they's jest thank ya rail sexy, hear ( Read more... )

teaokay
Can armpits or other body orifices and cracks produce quality cheese?

Cheese. Oh, the pawr of cheese. One taaaaaaayum, I had a yeast infection and I thought it were cheese, but it weren't. But ah spread it on some crackers and it were still good!

So, in answer to yer question... no... but ye get shit jest as good!

fredericchopin
Subject: Hello!
Would you happen to know a splendid recipe for raw liver pudding? I am hoping a good batch would pep me up and cure my tuberculosis right on out.
Thanks!

1 lb Liver ( Read more... )

midnightrunning
Sally,

Who is the man I will marry?

-Midnight Running

Hunny, with yo skinny little ass, y'all be lucky to get Woody Allen on a horny day! Put some meat on yo bones and then ya might get some.

zombie_granny
Dearest Fat Sally. Will I ever meet the boogeyman of my dreams?

Did ah hear summin' say meat??
Eh.
Wail. I kin tell ya that ya gonna meet him one day in that thar graveyard on 5th and Spring, I will. Ya gon' know it's him, 'cause he's gon' have three teeth.

This is the first entry, where you'uns can post yer questions.